Today’s guest post comes from Sherrilee
Teenager and I attend a Universalist/Unitarian church in southwest Minneapolis. It’s a place with some rite and ritual, but not too much, which is just perfect for me. Like many institutions, there is a lot going on around the holidays, but my favorite, bar none, is the Holiday Pageant.
Like most pageants, we have Mary and Joseph and shepherds. But we also have wise folk, who bring frankincense, myrrh as well as diapers and other things babies need. We have the wind and also angels on wheels who delivery the baby to the manger. And because the idea is to include as many kids as possible, we have lots and lots of angels and a wide variety of manger animals. Over the years we’ve had dragons, kittens, and bees. One year a kid brought his Golden Retriever.
You have to be least five to be in the pageant and when Teenager was little, she could hardly wait to be part of the presentation. On the first Sunday of pageant sign-up I asked her what part she would like to play. She responded by asking what she could be, so I trotted out the litany of options for her. “You can be an angel, you can be Mary, you can be a wise one, you can be a shepherd….” I didn’t even get to finish the sentence before she said “I want to be a leopard.” Sure she had misheard me, I said “Did you mean shepherd?” Nope, she had said leopard and she meant leopard.
Leopard it was. I splotched golden brown paint onto a black sweatshirt and sweatpants and we borrowed a fuzzy tail and ears from a friend. I know I’m her parent, but even so, she was absolutely the cutest thing. As all the animals trooped through the sanctuary that morning, there she was, waltzing up the aisle, swishing her tail back and forth. She completely fit into the menagerie of the manger that day.
In following years, she played a wise one twice (she had me make her a Mulan costume for this), an angel and finally she was old enough to play an angel on wheels, for which she wore all black and rode her scooter. When she was 10 she decided she was old enough to retire from the pageant, so now I sit and watch other children play these parts every holiday season. But I always see her in my mind’s eye, in her leopard outfit, completely sure that she fits into the pageant as well as anyone else.
When have you been the one to add an unexpected twist?
Trail Baboon 
Good morning. Thanks for telling us about those treasured memories, VS. What a cute little leopard.
I dressed up as Santa for my children and grandchildren for many years. I tried to add a twist to the role by giving Santa a fake voice of some kind. One year I gave him a french accent. I said: “Oui, oui, I am zee French Santa”. Then there there was the hippy dippy cool far out Santa. I think the pirate Santa was a little too scary for a very young granddaughter and I had to tone that one down when I saw that she was about to start crying. I can’t remember any of the other voices I used, but there were several others.
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i can see it jim the hippy dippy santa . like ah merry chrstmas man.. hey little dudes…whats happenin…
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I suppose you could argue that I added and unexpected twist on the occasion where I, dressed in a Swedish jultomte suit, rang the doorbell of the wrong house. I’ll never forget the disappointed look on the faces of those little kids when I had to tell them I was in the wrong place. How I wish I had had at least a candy cane to give them. Thirty years later I still feel bad about it.
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how awful its grinchlike
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maybe we could go do that at michele bachmanns house?
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A few years ago at the college Christmas concerts my daughter was sitting in the booth with me during the show. Santa, who makes his appearance in the second half, wandered into the booth while he was waiting.
Daughter noticed him and kinda stiffened up but didn’t say anything. I’m busy on the lightboard so didn’t pay much attention to either of them. A few minutes later I notice her sort of bent over. When I ask what’s wrong it’s apparent she’s about to burst into tears and she’s just trying to hold it together.
We hustle out of the booth into another office and she starts to bawl. She was afraid of Santa.
The man playing Santa felt terrible of course.
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it reminds me of the wayne dyer dedication to all the scurvy elephants in the world. he misheard his teacher say that he was a disturbing element. a leopard sounds much better than a shepherd any day.
when i was a younger man the temptation of being the one to add a different twist was a majotr part of the fun of life. the group of guys i hung with in schol were imaginative and we came up with wonderful stuff that required an excessive amount of detail work to pull off in order to make an unexpected unexplainable statement to the word. there are groups out there today that continue the tradition. i remember reding about a group in england where everyone synchronized their watches and at precisely whatever o’clock everyone took of their shirt in a department store. i believe it was all men so the topless issue was inappropriate not illegal, well we did similar things like the time we went to the airport with movie cameras and guitar cases and had a scene where the rock star would walk out to the gate and then turn around and begin walking back to the terminal whereupon the movie cameras and microphones would pop out of the walls and begin interviewing the rock stars and the whole idea was to get reaction of those walking by and see if they could figure out who the rock star was. remember when you could walk to the airport and watch planes landing just because thats what you wanted to do? ( and we used to have to get up to change the channel on the tv set too kids). we had other odd bits like ordering many different types of potatoes as a group. we would go into a restraunt pre chosen by the number of potato optione offered (baked augrautin twice baked american fries hash browns and everyone would order only potatos and then we would all ask for separate checks and pay in canadian money. hardly earth shaking but it was a hoot. we kayaked one year in goodwill store pinstripped suits up on the brule for pictures. 20 guys in suits in their kayak ( they got tucked into plastic bags as the day wore on but the first hour of the day we were making fashion statements for sure.)
great pictures of teenager.
happy holidays gang. enjoy the day.
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The incident of the guys going suddenly shirtless in a department store was stage in an Abercrombie & Fitch somewhere out east by the local chapter of the Cacaphony Society. What made it especially hilarious was that the store, consistent with its marketing image, had hired buff young males to pose in key areas of the store. The Cacaphony members were neither buff nor young, but they were numerous and it tended to dilute the impact of the marketing effort. Stories about Cacaphony Society pranks make very entertaining reading. I believe they once flooded a Best Buy with shoppers dressed in blue polo shirts. At some point, it seems, store security gets involved and it all becomes very silly.
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Wish I had known about the Cacophony Society a long time ago.
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Me too. (Now I know why spell check kept underlining Cacaphony) should have investigated, I guess.
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hadn’t even noticed, bill.
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thats the one. i had heard about them a couple of times and i always laugh and think its nice that there are other twisted minds that like to have fun out there. thanks bill i would never have come up with it.
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Well, tim, Bill beat me to it, but today’s question seems tailor made for you! You’re a cacaphony society in and of yourself 🙂 but it is more fun to share the moment.
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I love the way you think, tim.
I’ve managed a few things like that. A friend once suggested we deliver a basketball to the one lingerie shop in Rochester. So, clad in hard hats and carrying clip boards we went in, handed it to the clerk, marked her off the check list, said thank you and walked back out.
It saddens me that this is the guy now who won’t return a phone call or email. We get a Christmas card from his wife, but I can’t tell you how many times I’ve called and emailed him and he’s just busy I guess; no reply. They live in NY state so haven’t seen each other in many years.
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send him a basketball ups with a hardhat and a clipboard. he’ll respond or you can write him off once and for all
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Another unexpected Christmas present! Thanks Sherrilee and Dale. I adore this blog; these Christmas pageants sound magical. Love that the kids get to decide what animal they will be, and I think the leopard is a very nice touch indeed. And, I might add, that leopard is the cutest damn leopard I’ve ever laid eyes on, small wonder that has stayed with you, vs.
Right off the top of my head, I can’t think of a single occasion where I have been the one to add an unexpected twist! That’s alarming, not to mention a really sad commentary of how predictable and compliant I have been most of my life. I hope that once my morning coffee kicks in that I’ll think of an occasion or two where I might have added an unexpected twist.
Det er næsten Jul, se at komme ud af fjerene, baboons.
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de har brug for at sove bare lidt længere. vil det være langs nat venter på santa
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Nå, ja, jeg glemte i farten at vi er i Amerika. Her kommer julenissen ikke før imorgen tidlig. Hos os kommer han i aften.
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thats den eneste måde han kan få det hele gjort. han havde at fortælle europa, at de får gaver juleaften eller der ikke ville være tid til at levere alle de vigtige gaver i amerika
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SNORT, that’s all I can say to that, an emphatic SNORT.
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Ingen tidslomme kontinuum?
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parallel univers ville være praktisk nej?
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Rats!
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So, Jane, is tim’s Danish spelling as creative as his English?
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His spelling is fine, it’s the sentence structure that’s a little goofy, but it’s good enough that I can figure out what he’s trying to say in most cases.
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måske dens fordi jeg er nødt til at oversætte til swahili først, derefter til dansk. min danske lærer var fra afrika
in swahili
labda kwa sababu nina kutafsiri kwa swahili kwanza kisha kwa denmark. mwalimu wangu wa denmark ilikuwa kutoka africa
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So, tim, are you fluent in Swahili? Interesting concept, using Swahili as the facilitator of translation from Danish to English or vise versa.
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Nice j’Awl.
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Anyone care to translate? Can’t stand to be left out of the snorting.
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My snorting was in response to tim’s assertion that the reason Santa delivers gifts in Europe on Christmas Eve is so that he has time to make it to the US with the really important gifts on Christmas Day.
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PJ, it appears that Santa managed to find you in time to deliver your “really important” gift — the yellow plastic rose!
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You got a point, Robin. I should be grateful.
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i need help with my french onion soup. its flat as can be. onons olive oil butter and bay leaves with a cup or two of red wine. no zing at all. any suggestions? ill bake the cheese on it for the bonfire tonight but i would like to spruce it up a bit
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Garlic and salt. If you have a Parmesan rind that will help. If you don’t have one, I do. Just toss it in the pot.
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i may stop by thanks
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No Gruyere cheese or garlic?
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i went to by gruyere and emmenthaller yesterday for my fondue tonight (thats our tradition) and it was 17 dollars for 7 ounces at cub ementhaller was 10 dollars for 7 ounces. what the hell is going on. i bought jarlsberg instead but im disappointed. i wnder if they didnt just crank the price for the hoildays for all the yuppies who buy what the recipe calls for no matter what the price. trader joes didnt have it so im looking for future cheese shopping locations.
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Try Costco. They ere giving samples of a nice Gruyere yesterday that was cheaper than that!
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i was there looking and didnt find it.
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they had it 10 a pound
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Garlic and black pepper would be my choices……….
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Did you carmelize the onions really slowly with a bit of sugar. IF not you could make a batch of well carmelized and stir them in
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Good idea!
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the premise of my french onion soup is three times the onions carmelized for the first day till they are so sweet it makes the soup special. today its flat. even with a second dose of garlic and bay leaves port wine. oh well thats it for this batch but thanks for the ideas.
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Would a homemade vegetable broth like they have in the Greens Cookbook have helped? The broth can make all the difference.
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most people use beef broth for that reason but its never ben an issue for me . its always rich and wonderful so maybe its something i did in the carmelizing,
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I’m off to an ugly sweater brunch and white elephant gift exchange breakfast with a bunch of female friends. Catch y’all later.
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great tradition
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Daughter found what she thought was an ugly Christmas sweater of her dad’s to wear to school for Ugly Sweater Day last week, and to her chagrin found that people really liked the one she chose. She is very distainful of my Norwegian sweaters, and I told her that someday they would be fashionable and she would have to get some for herself when that happened.
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Husband wore a beautiful, Norwegian style sweater, hand knitted by his mother, to his company’s ugly sweater day last week. He needs to hang on to for another decade or two, and it’ll come back in style. But what’s another decade or two to an already 50 year old sweater?
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Those are really knit to last, aren’t they? None of this “buy a new sweater on sale every year” stuff. When your Norwegian mother or grandmother knit something, they didn’t fool around.
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I’m back from the ugly sweater/white elephant breakfast. Lots of fun, but wouldn’t you know it, I ended up with the gift from the only person in the group who interprets white elephant to mean something truly ugly and worthless, a yellow plastic rose.
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Rise and Shine Baboons!
I am the one who adds unexpected touches in my own quiet way. This was the source of significant embarrassment to my mother who was a traditional kind of gal who did not want any ad libbing or new programming. Only the script for her.
As a blond, blue-eyed 4year old pageant angel, I picked my nose. As a clarinetist, I added vibrato. As a student I added entertaining doodles to my notes and homework. Once while playing the bass drum in a street polka band, I decided to drum on the off-beat to see what would happen. What happened was the band director nearly blew his hat off!
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great ideas all
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Jacque, Jacque, Jacque, try to behave!!!
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When Daughter was about four, they placed her right in front of the microphone at a church pageant, and it was irresistable to her, and she got closer and closer to the mic until it sounded like she was the soloist with a large back-up choir. I kept signaling to her to back away, but she ignored me so her dad and Ij ust slouched down in the pew hoping no one would remember she was ours.
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The band was marching to a different drummer, as it were.
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I added an unexpected twist when I was born. My parents thought they couldn’t have children, and mom initially thought I was gall stones. My, were my parents surprised.
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Unexpected twist? Geez, that should be my middle name. Hyphenated, of course.
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My unexpected touch comes from the world’s coolest grandson. My daughter Molly gave Liam (2 1/2 yrs old) a creche this week to help him visualize the Christmas story. It has a little manger and the figures of Mary, Joseph, Baby Jesus, a mess of Shepherds and the three Wise Guys. The shepherds have several sheep, and I think there is a donkey and maybe some camels in there somewhere.
Molly watched Liam playing with this but didn’t notice at first that he was adding to the creche cast of characters with toys he already owned. Then she saw a strange figure hanging just behind the manger. “Good god, Liam, what is THAT? That looks like your grizzly bear!!”
“He heard the angels say Baby Jesus was here,” Liam explained. “So he came to see.”
Liam’s grizzly is a ferocious figure that is standing.upright, his paws held out ready to strike, his great jaws open to reveal all those teeth. He lurks behind the manger, his head turned to view the scene. The sheep sleep with their feet curled beneath them. The donkey looks bored. All the people are looking at Baby Jesus, not the grizzly. From his discrete position behind the manger, the bear shares in the moment, and he really doesn’t look so badly out of place. He has, as Liam said, just dropped by to see this marvelous little figure on the straw bed.
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Love that picture, Steve. At our daughter’s house, the plastic dinosaurs are part of the entourage at the creche. Adoring dinosaurs. Some of them have big teeth, though.
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This actually represents progress in Liam’s view of the world. He has tended to demonize and fear bears and sharks and probably some other predators. Big teeth or no, when a kid puts a mighty predator in a creche and says the critter just dropped by to pay regards to Baby Jesus, that seems like a victory over a kid’s personal demons and the emergence of a more tolerant world view.
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A grizzly at the Nativity seems perfectly appropriate. Love it.
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the bear represents the tea party upset over the 46% who need hand outs like places to sleep for those excess population who have children even though they cant afford it.imagine needing public assistance and good will from strangers. who dare they?
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ach, I want to make a leisurely day of it and just read the last few entries, but I have got to get off this computer and get the skillet cookies made to take to my aunt’s tomorrow.
For those of you who have no idea what I am talking about, skilllet cookies are little balls of dates, rice crispies, coconut and walnuts (my recipe comes from an old Lutheran Brotherhood cookbook). I have to make them if I want to eat them, as I have never encountered them outside my extended family. Grandma always made them, as one of my aunt’s had celiac sprue, and in the olden days, when I was but a maedchen, rice crispies were what there was that was gluten free.
I’ve also got a batch of 50’s era German-American stollen going (as opposed to the Dresdener version with almond paste). It may not be “authentic”, but there is enough milk, butter and egg in there to truly soothe the troubled soul.
Merry Christmas to all Baboons Great and Small!
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I am making the Dresdener version today!
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Recipe?
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Dresden Stollen
1 c mixed glaceed fruit
1/2 c light raisins
1/2 c currants
1/4 c diced citron
1/2 c halved glaceed cherries
1/4 c dark rum
combine above ingredients and let fruit soak for at least an hour
1/4 c. warm water
2 envelopes of yeast
1/4 t. sugar
place the above together in a large mixing bowl and let sit 5 minutes until foamy
1 c warm milk
5 c all purpose flour
3/4 c softened butter
1/2 c sugar
1/2 t. salt
1c sliced almonds, lightly toasted
1 small can of almond paste
stir in milk to yeast mixture and add 2 c flour. Beat well. cover and let rise for 10-15 minutes, until puffy. stir down sponge and add eggs, butter, and salt. Ad 2 more cups of flour, and mix until a soft dough is formed. turn out on a floured surface and knead in about 1 more cup of flour a little at a time, then knead for about 5 minutes until smooth and satiny. sprinkle fruit with 2 T of flour, mix in, then knead the fruit and almonds into the dough. This will be a sticky mess, but it eventually turns into a solid loaf. place dough in a lightly oiled bowl and let rise, covered, for 90 minutes.
Punch dough down, and cut in half. Form each half into an oval 12 X 8. Brush with melted butter. Put thinly sliced rounds of almond paste on the longest half of the oval closest to you. Fold the oval in half lengthwise. Press top edge into bottom to seal. place on large baking sheet lined with two sheets of parchement. cover and let loaves rise for 1 hour.
Brush loaves again with butter. Bake in a preheated 375 oven oven for 20-25 minutes until loaves test done. Brush again with melted butter, sprinkle with powdered sugar, and drizzle with brandy. Let cool. Repeat with more butter, powdered sugar, and brandy.
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Mmmmmmmmm
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Now that i am in the thick of baking this, it may take up to 40 minutes for this to bake.
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Definitely worth every minute!
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Bill and I are recalling an occasion when we were members of a Living History group (a Civil War era civilian re-enacting group). It was at our annual Christmas party when Bill and two other fellows dressed up in brocade robes and extravagant head garb, draped themselves in beads and amulets as the Three Wise Guys and sang a wonderful medley — the best part of which was “Three Little Maids From School Are We” sung to the tune of “We Three Kings”.
“Three little maids from school are we,
Pert as a school girl well can be,
Filled to the brim with girlish glee,
Three little maids from school!
Perfect for three crusty old bearded geezers 🙂
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Morning-
My family Christmases rotate around the family in the area. A few years ago when we hosted I said the theme would be ‘Our German / Irish heritage circa 1895’. Now my family doesn’t do ‘themes’ or ‘games’… we’re mostly Norwegian. We have fun, but we’re all practical you know. Pick up chairs and wash the dishes while others play.
But I gave it a theme. And there were some Irish cookies and someone wore green and that was about the extent of it and that was fine.
Next time our turn was up the theme was ‘Christmas Under the Sea in King Arthur’s Court!’ I wore some fake chain mail. Someone bought fish crackers and my brother had a Beanie baby shark in his pocket.
Again, just about what I expected.
So this year my sister is hosting. I asked about the theme and she decided it should be ‘snowmen’. Again, pretty much silence from the family. But we have some ideas… (not having Christmas until the 29th).
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I am prone to tinkering with recipes and monkeying with cake mixes. One of the better results was a dark chocolate orange cake with cinnamon and a bit of cayenne pepper. I brought it to a work potluck. Everyone saw “chocolate Bundt cake” – no one expected the cayenne. It was, however, gone before left that day.
The other twist that comes to mind was from my years as a village idiot at the Renaissance Festival. I created a character named “Jenny” who mostly behaved like a five-year-old and had a five-year-old’s mindset (played with toys, ate all foods with her fingers, etc.). She did, however, have the vocabulary of a college-educated grown-up…and finding just the right time to slide in an especially juicy word was a ton of fun.
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I did not say, but should have, that is one darn cute leopard. Every Christmas Pageant should be so lucky to have such a darling critter in their midst. 🙂
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Ditto
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Amen, Anna. Sherrilee, a great post and darling daughter. As someone who was the perennial sheep in those pageants (it was the 50’s and we didn’t step out of the box very often), I applaud your little leopard’s aplomb and her mother who sewed and sponged her heart out!
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Completely OT but we have heat here!!!!!!! It’s been two days… had to go out and get a heating pad to keep the fish alive!
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glad to hear it. sorry to hear it
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Off for our annual holiday eve w/ dear friends. I’ll check back in later!
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I was the anon onion comment before. I had friends who family belonged to a liberal church. Everyone had to be in the pageant and pick their own role. It was a little too loose for me but I enjoyed the year when we came as the stable draped in brown paper. IT hadn’t been done before and the liberal adults were worried about the change 🙂
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Now my doily is the right color but Beth-Ann is not populating well-must be on the naughty list for sure.
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welcome ba merry christmas
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Back from the wilds of Nowthen. I received one of those quilted pie/baked goods carriers — just like the one that Linda always brings and that I’ve been so jealous of. Woo hoo!!!
And the house is WARM. Double woo hoo!
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Was your furnace out, Sherrilee? Besides food, a working furnace is most desirable in winter and I don’t know how you were managing without heat.
We’re watching “It’s a Wonderful Life” and baking blueberry muffins and rice pudding for tomorrow’s breakfast with our girls’ families and granddaughters. Also reading my mother’s memoirs which she’s begun writing at 99 yrs old. An amazing life. All in all a somewhat teary Christmas eve, but lovely and peaceful nevertheless. Merry Christmas!
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It turned out to be the thermostat (which is what I had thought all along, but you know that technicians rarely listen to single female homeowners). First technician diagnosed something else, part was ordered but never arrived. After strongarming power company, they sent a second technician (they wanted to just wait for the part to arrive — turns out the part was actually never ordered). Second technician confirmed MY suspicions.
Thanks goodness for the fireplace during the day and at night, the old-fashioned space heater and 8 layers of blankets. As I said, fish was the recipient of a heating pad to keep him alive!
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Merry Christmas Baboons! Have a peaceful day.
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