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Remembrance

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I came of age in the sixties, when it was all the rage to be un-patriotic. It felt like blinders had come off for the first time; we didn’t want to accept the perfect glowing images we had grown up with but were seeing America in all its stark reality.  This got ugly fast, of course.  Vietnam vets got the brutal end of this, as if risking life and limb wasn’t enough, but you had to put up with immature folks back home ridiculing you for your service.

Then the pendulum swung back after 911. In shoring up our solidarity we reverted back to flags and flag decals everywhere, freedom fries in the congressional cafeteria and presidents decried if they didn’t have their flag pin in their lapel every time they stepped out.

I feel smack in the middle of this spectrum. Having traveled quite a bit, I feel quite strongly that there are few places where I would prefer to live.  Religious struggles, authoritarian regimes, overly controlling policies (think.. it’s a crime to spit out your gum), racism/sexism practically built into the system – all of these things make me think I’ll just stay here, thank you very much.  On the other side of this fence is my feeling of disquiet about our current political crisis; it’s embarrassing when I travel.  (Except when I go to London, as their problems are pretty overwhelming right now as well so they’re not as quick to judge.)

But in general, I’m glad to be an American and will fly my big flag this weekend and stick my little flags out in the front garden. No picnics or parades, but a quiet weekend of gardening and weeding and thinking of those who have fallen for me.

What are your plans for the weekend?

62 thoughts on “Remembrance”

  1. we looked up the weather and sunday is the correct together to do the family get together in the backyard so that is what we will do. the invites have gone out with the food list published. brats and baby back ribs, veggie brats and hot dogs, corn on the cob, green salad, potato salad, watermelon, beans, shish kabob, frozen fruit salad, off the top of my head along with the fun group games we play. my sister got a new jack russel terrier who is really cute but my dogs would like to eat him so we need to work on acclimation, my grandkid is the center of attention these days and he is great. daughter is home from college so the only one missing is the son in arizona. its a fun family get together.
    other that that i have 3 cars to repair. 2 are in progress with parts that need to be put back together. watch the twins, (ljb we can party this year) ride my motorcycle and do my business homework trying to get caught up.
    yesterday it turned from 45 and rain in the morning to 70 and rain in the afternoon to 70 and sunny in the evening.
    today it starts out being motorcycle weather and i am going to do my best to find time to enjoy that.
    i still have residual anti flag feelings from the 60’s. i am not a flag waver.
    i have a flag shirt i bought in the 60’s i still pull out for the forth of july, maybe i will wear that too.
    i talked to my wife about moving to canada or simply traveling the world as a retirement program but she wants to hunker down in her own little corner of the world and rock in her rocking chair. america may be a great place to be from but the ugly american persona is more than i can stand. we are pigs in general and the rest of the world looks pretty good when you look at options for day trips. central america is supposed to be a hot commodity to retire where the dollar goes so far the difference is noticeable.
    if i can set it up so i can have a home base and travel the world i will let america solve its own problems while i say i am form there. my political views have always been appreciated in every foreign country i have ever visited. loving clinton and obama and not living bush or trump are welcome discussion bases to start from.
    i am very concerned that we are a country of alt right supremacists more than we knew but i am glad to be aware. kepp your friends close and your enemies closer is a good philosophy, better to be aware that the elephant in the room is a scary ugly horrible person than to be pollyanna thinking he is just like me only not voting for hillary because he is confused. trump still has 38% approval rating…. how can that be?
    40% right 40% left and the 20% in the middle make the decisions. meanwhile the courts the borders the front page news is all we her about and its all horrible. america is the worst possible choice there is … except for all the others.
    we will heal up and fix the screwed up stuff but its hard to watch,

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      1. cards against humanity is the funniest game i have ever played
        it reminds you of trivial pursuits but with smut and poor taste as a given premise
        there is a game of looking at odd pictures and writing a caption for them. very interesting
        then there is a game where you pick a word from a deck of cards face down and put it up on your forehead forveveyone but you to see. they give you clues and you name the word. good humor but my son in law who is an english as a second language has to be factored in so his stack of words gets edited.
        charades and draw your clues a couple of card games and a new dice game are mindless fun games that don’t penalize people who suck at strategy or memorization kind of stuff.
        the gauge always seems to be how hard we laugh. my son wins at lots of games do we delight in messing him up my moms is reaching a iq meltdown so some games are ones she should be on a team for. it an ever transitioning game. i love horseshoes for summer get togethers chip the golf ball into the laundry basket bocce ball
        it goes on and on. new dog ( sisters 10 week old pup) and new kid( ari just turned 1 ) don’t effect choices yet but they too effect (what’s the affect effect rule?) the game choice length, time take etc.
        we don’t always play a game but likely 75% of the time we will

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        1. Yes about cards against humanity… played out at Stepson’s… : ) And is the one about pictures & captions called Dixit? Some friends are bringing that one over tonight.

          We got to learn (well, start to learn) Rook last night. My mom was able to play Uno or Crazy 8s until just a few years ago…

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        2. I used to play Rook with some friends some forty years ago.

          Now the card game that is all the rage in one circle of friends is called Hand and Foot.

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  2. We are in Brookings getting to know our grandson. We last saw him at Thanksgiving. He is now 1 year old. He is fun. We will hit the greenhouse here looking for a few plants, heip son plan a salsa garden, and sbop in Sioux Falks. Just leisurely.

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  3. I will spend the weekend cleaning, prepping the house, being invaded by fourteen of Daughter’s friends, celebrate her 15th birthday (which is today, but murder mystery party with sit-down dinner and sleepover is tomorrow…no, I’m not sure where I will put all of them…), then clean up after said invasion. It will be a lovely time – nothing like the sound of friends laughing together to ease whatever ails you. Come Monday afternoon I may just nap…but today I will enjoy the sunshine while I vacuum and clean the guinea pig cage and bake a cake. 🙂

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      1. Plain devil’s food (at the request of the birthday girl). I did shave some rose chocolate onto the top – because I’m really not capable of “plain.”

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  4. Glad you’re safe back at home LjB. It’s been pretty quiet here without you.

    I plan to get out today.
    I mean they intend to let me out today.

    And just because “Go Big or Go Home’, one of our dogs, Humphrey, went to the vet yesterday because he wasn’t quite right either. They think it was just something he ate.
    He’s coming home today too.

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        1. liposuction for solution?
          what was the cause?

          i get real frustrated when they focus on the symptom and don’t dig to figure out cause to find remedy

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    3. Glad to hear you’re getting out, Ben! I was going to check in with you to see what was happening, but hadn’t gotten to it yet.

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      1. Took most of the afternoon, but finally got home about 5:30.
        Sat on the front steps and let all three dogs climb on me.

        Good to be home and looking forward to sleeping in my own bed tonight.

        As for the rest of the weekend, more laying low and keeping my leg up.
        I can walk as much as I want. (Which with the foot originally wasn’t my best thing) otherwise keep it up.

        Thanks for all the good wishes! I do appreciate it.

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        1. The checkout process can take a loooong time, in my experience. Keep recovering and doing what you need to to get better.

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  5. I plan to do some yard/garden work today (would rather sit in the yard and do nothing but someone’s got to do it). Maybe shop at the thrift store on Sunday for summer clothes because I need more things that fit my new body. It’s all part of the process of getting things in order and getting prepared to move to Rochester.

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    1. i can take you tuesday to my special goodwill that has unbelievable quality in their offerings and big selection too. won’t be until 4 or 5 if you’re interested

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      1. I’m usually too tired by that time of the day to do much, tim. You should have my phone number, you can call or text me. Tell me which Goodwill it is and I’ll see if I can fit it in sometime in the next couple weeks.

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        1. it’s at 394 and 494 near ridge dale
          i’m in better shape for 930 pick up
          and 11 return to you house other weeks if that works better

          my daughters say savers is having a 50% off sale
          i’m not a savers guy . they love it

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        2. Thanks, tim. Now that I know which Goodwill it is, I’ll try that one sometime. I went to the Savers sale today and found a few things but need some more. I used to have a Savers about a mile and a half from my house, but it closed because their rent went up. Kind of maddening because it was so darn convenient, both for shopping and for donating.

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  6. Pretty low-key weekend here. So far we’re celebrating the return of warm weather – ahh, and a sunny day – by taking our friend W to the Farmers Market. Tonight we get to go to a pot luck with UU friends. Tomorrow we’ll picnic somewhere, again with W, and maybe do a game night with people we’ve been trying to do that with for a long time.

    Some gardening – would love to thin out the hostas on the north side. Last night hurried to dig out a bunch of plantain under the clothes line, while the ground is wet.

    Just went do to the river, which is VERY high again – there are benches at the lower part of the levee that are under water again. Some oat house people have to row in and out of there places, as no access by car. And more rain expected Monday…

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  7. Except for a brief moment immediately following 9/11, I’m not much of a flag waver. I find both my spirit and body so battered at the moment, that
    this song pretty much sums up how I feel:

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  8. Memorial Day and Veterans Day are two observances that I’m ambivalent about. Patriotism, under the best of circumstances, is suspect, and we’re not exactly in one of this country’s finer moments right now. I’m not buying that our past or present military forces, were necessarily fighting for our freedom. And if DT follows through on pardoning a number of veterans who have been convicted of war crimes, we have hit a new low.

    We will be celebrating tomorrow with a bunch of old friends – and I do mean old – on Ann’s front porch (weather permitting), but I’ll miss the annual get-together of the Eddies and friends on Harriet Island. That gathering was a favorite of ours for so many years and for so many reasons. A rag-tag bunch of neighbors who embodied acceptance and tolerance, and a fair amount of irreverence for “the establishment.” Wonderful memories.

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    3. I’m ambivalent, too, PJ. It seems that often patriotism is defined as never questioning the policies and actions of this country, which shouldn’t be the case. And I admit to having doubts that all our wars were fought to preserve our freedom. I’ve never been much of a flag-waver.

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  9. Busy day today. Funeral this morning and then a boat load of yard work including weeding, cutting the grass and chopping / digging up a hydrangea. And of course the ongoing battle against the Creeping Charlie. And some time in my studio.

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    1. I don’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of keeping up with the Creeping Charlie, Creeping Bellflower, Wild Columbines, and Wild Carrot, to name just a few of the wildflowers thriving in my yard. So, I’m taking a page from the playbook of a local “natural yard” gardener. Learn the botanical names of these intruders, and focus on the benefits they provide in terms of habitat and sustenance for butterflies, birds, and bees. A bouquet of wildflowers can really be a lovely thing. Right now Lilies of the Valley are blooming, and although they are invasive, I love them. Peace.

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      1. Well I do have to say that the Creeping Charlie smells wonderful, but that’s all I’m willing take care of it in the positive department.

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    2. try vinagar and hot sauce watered down and applied only on the desired weed rubber gloves and a bucket with a rag or paintbrush or tip depending on level of ocd involved

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  10. Rise and Shine Baboons,

    I am back from Iowa and our Cemetery Decoration Extravaganza. We shed a few tears at the graves of dad, grandparents and Aunt and Uncle, all who we miss so much. We saluted our Veterans of the Civil War, WWI, WWII, and Korea. We decorated Uncle Roy’s grave against the advice of our Aunts who said, “Well, we just have to stop somewhere.” (He died in 1918 of the Spanish Flu after taking my schoolteacher Grandmother back to the school for the work week. He became ill on the way home and never recovered. After he died, the family had to leave the farm and they moved back to Town. They never forgave him.). So we told our family stories.

    My mother is failing a lot now. She cannot remember where the gravesites are anymore, and she is forgetting some of the people, as well. That is sad, and I think she feels insecure because of it.

    Today I am in the garden trying to plant the rest of the garden—It is so wet! Tomorrow I think I will cook ribs and make rhubarb pie. Our rhubarb is the very definition of vigorous.

    Edith and Ben, welcome home. Edith, your photos on Caring Bridge are spectacular. I love the one labeled “Reflections.”

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    1. my brother and his wife were down in the Ringstead area of Iowa late last week hitting the cemeteries.
      Kelly needs to get over to Wilbert and Ceylon area cemeteries of MN (around Fairmont) but she’s been a little occupied with me lately. 🙂

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    2. Thanks, Jacque. I feel like I’m just taking snapshots now so that I don’t get too rusty, but am happy that other people like my casual shots.

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  11. I had a project today that was kind of fun. I installed an electronic deadbolt on my back door. The kind where you punch in a code to unlock it. I had been looking at them for several years in hardware stores, but they always cost about a hundred dollars, and that seemed a little spendy. Then last winter I was at Home Depot and saw one on a display, a special purchase or something, for $35. so I jumped at it. I didn’t want to install it when it was cold out, though, because you have to have the door open.

    So today I got it done. I’m terribly pleased with it.

    I also brought some cut lilacs to the cemetery where my mom is buried yesterday. And today I paid a visit to my aunt Roberta. Both days I did a lot of yard work, too. Tomorrow I rest.

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  12. Didn’t even get on the trail yesterday. Was so busy. A lot of yard work and some Farmers Market. YA and I finally won the battle of the hydrangea bush. A friend planted a hydrangea bush many years ago right along the fence line and the concrete line of my neighbor’s driveway. The hydrangea was never happy. Never. It rarely got white blooms, didn’t have the right pH or acid or something in the soil no matter what I did. And it couldn’t be trusted to stay on our side of the fence which drove the neighbors crazy. So I’m finally YA and hacked it all out over he last two days. It was a lot of work. We’re leaving the area mostly empty for now but I did plant a peony in the general vicinity. Not up against the fence or near the concrete!

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        2. Many people make the mistake of planting peonies too deep. If the buds (eyes) are more than an inch or two under ground, they will not bloom.

          I had purchased myself a beautiful and expensive tree peony four years ago. The first year it had only one gorgeous flower. The second year it had two. Last spring it had three, and then husband ran it over with his lawn mower. Don’t know that I’ll ever forgive him, or that I’ll live long enough to see it ever recover enough to bloom again.

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