Your Name Here

Our city is doing a feasibility study to see if we should  build an event center.  We don’t have any large scale venues for conventions and such.  The city manager said in a newspaper interview that the building will be paid for by donations, and that  whoever donated the most money would get naming rights.  I hope whoever does this isn’t embarrassing or somehow notorious.  There is a music hall at the University of North Dakota named after a rather unscrupulous fellow named Chester Fritz, who was a ND native who  became a leading gold trader in the post-World War II period and made several fortunes and had a very tumultuous life.   This made me think what, if anything  I would want named after me.  If it depended on how much money I could donate, I am afraid it would probably be a memorial stopwatch for future psychologists at my agency to use during test administration.   Husband paid for a paver with his family name on it for the walk way into the local library.   He paid $500 for the honor, but most of the money goes to the library.   Wasn’t it our Jim the Baboon who has a nematode named after him?

What would you want named after you?

63 thoughts on “Your Name Here”

        1. I’m thinking something along the lines of the”Bumbling Bill Flip.” Haven’t quite figured out what it would involve in terms of physical adroitness, but you’ve gotta start somewhere. I’m clueless as to the cookie.

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        2. I like it. A bold move, though, to name a skill or a cookie before inventing it.
          As a lefthander, I am sort of by definition maladroit but as long as the skill or the cookie can be associated as closely with my talents as a eponymous conference center would be with my interest in large meetings, it all makes perfect sense.

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        3. how about a bill flop kind of like a cow flop and you could have the bill flop throwing contest throwing billy flops lik a discus while doing the billy flop as part of the required landing as the spin move takes you out of the flop circle and into the landing pit full of bill flops where you can eat them as a part of the landing
          the judges will score your moves your finish your distance and you bill flop chewing technique
          large coconut macaroon looking billy flops in the mouth from the pit
          but why bill? a gymnastics event and cookie ?
          it reminds me of that world famous product the band saw with an am/fm radio in it because… i need a band saw and i need a radio . it’s s little inconvenient to take my band saw iron the bathroom with me or to the beach but i won’t have to look for a radio while i’m sawing wood because it will be right there

          i like gymnastics and i like cookies maybe i can combine them into one fluid motion of bliss

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  1. Reading I did years ago taught me that the logging era in northern Minnesota, Wisconsin and Michigan was a wild and wooly time. Fabulous wealth was claimed by guys who broke laws in order to claim timber rights. It was a time when criminals were richly rewarded for all kinds of misconduct. The worst crooks got towns named after them. A list of town names from northern areas would be a pretty accurate list of the most shameless rogues alive when the vast pine forests were being logged.

    What would I want named for me? That’s easy. I’d love to have my name attached to a block of wild land where critters could live natural lives and people could enjoy them.

    Liked by 4 people

        1. how about having your cremated ashes turned into the plastic wood so you could be the bench with your epitaph being something about people sitting on your face or get off my back you a holes

          my whole life i never kissed anyone’s butt but now i’m dead and here we are … a little kiss on the cheeks
          forever…….

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        2. Hurtful? My comment was a response to Tim’s in that you don’t need to design the bench or the scenery, just the plaque and the plaque usually just says something simple.

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      1. Chris is a long-time volunteer with the organization Big Brothers Big Sisters. They refer to themselves as Bigs and the kids to whom they are mentors as Littles.

        Liked by 1 person

      1. I have worked in libraries, twice in my life. The time and energy they put into creating systems so that a book can be found is enormous and necessary. However, I used to fantasize about just putting a book any old place I felt like just because. So “my” library will do that. Maybe I will have only 100 books.

        Liked by 3 people

        1. Arguably, it would be easier to find a particular book you had in mind if they are filed in an organized fashion, however, if you’re like me and sometimes peruse a library or a book store looking for inspiration, I think your library would be an ideal place to find it.

          Liked by 2 people

        2. When I worked in the Grand Rapids Library, we became aware that people would hide books in the stacks that they wanted to be available to only them while they were in the library, and those folks would not check out that book (often erotic). Library habits are so interesting.

          Liked by 4 people

        3. I’m still trying to figure out how I came to read some of the wonderful books I stumbled on during my teens, and the only explanation that I can come up with is that some librarian payed close attention to what I perused and what I checked out, and steered me toward other books I might find interesting. There was no rhyme or reason to what I read, but I ended up reading books that propelled me into a universe of discovery, social justice and a passion for reading. I’m still a terribly disorganized reader. Even being an English major didn’t manage to instill enough discipline into my reading habits for me to pursue some sort of logical path.

          Liked by 2 people

  2. Husband is musing on this. A fancy outdoor offset grill, perhaps, named “The Kiffey Grill”. Kiffey is his nickname. The fuel would be either wood or charcoal, not pellets, with a chimney.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. We used to joke about naming a theater after the founders and us. It became quite a clunky acronym (other than our name). But something like “The Hain-SkaLaHoffZen” theater.

    Liked by 4 people

  4. I worried that anything named after me will be in trouble when it turns out that at some point in my life I did something that will be considered a horror a hundred years from now.

    But if I must, I’d like to have a library kiosk that serves warm cookies named after me.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. the sherrilee would be the kiosk in all libraries where warm cookies are served and your list of books on hold is updated automatically
      children would be rewarded with a special bonus cookie every 10 books (small cookie ) or every 50 books (very large cookie)

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I thought of another one: a peony—a lush, dark red peony that is fat and sassy. There is a pinkish iris named “Beverly Sills” which I just love. I had one for awhile.

    I had PT today—in two weeks I reduce the appointments to once a week. Yeah! My motion is increasing and my walking gait, while slow, is almost without a limp.

    Liked by 4 people

  6. Ooh, a flower, that’s a good one. I’d have to ponder what kind, I love so many of the old fashioned ones. Perhaps I’d go for an annual seed packet of wildflowers: Maggie’s Meadow Mix.

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    1. We don’t dislike you, ipb, I think we have a language problem. Mostly we don’t understand you. Or perhaps it would be more accurate to say, I don’t understand most of your posts. What is your native tongue?

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      1. Are you a teacher of some kind.. when-ever I read too my friends – at learning value, anything’s more money,, Activist, writing, screenplay, advice those damn on-line magazine’s English/ jew- just born in Hawaii- disabled, enjoys different languages & try’s hard every time I write — encouragement over money that’s not working – people telling me I’m not disabled – smart; yet- just not college wise.. Holocaust writing.. Noemi’s Nov. death is coming up & someone else on sunday

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      1. trying but my computer freaks out– You can respond to any of my writing.. Never ment to make anyone mad & that’s what it sounds like. Enjoying all your writing & putting all comments in quotes of mixture’s { not my fault disables enjoy encouraging life }

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      2. grow up i’m writing – not in a way you like – don’t be so mean too me.. I wrote something called Chameleon

        Phenomenon words are empty like a chameleon
        Elegance
        Over Darkness
        ‘’I enjoy this ‘’
        Hurt another, my imprisoned video, jealous cuz’
        our life grew stronger
        Chameleon
        A gecko
        Thought-ful demons riddle in my head, strategist, activist, writer, holocaust – sly
        with blackmail & a broken heart.
        Don’t just troll us
        we hide thoughts
        Regret soaks in
        Works hard; lack of affection
        ( Perfection )
        Aggravations too eerie
        Chameleon

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    2. I don’t think it’s that no one likes you it’s that your offerings generally don’t look for a response and they have absolutely nothing to do with the topic that our group is discussing

      you seem to be an abstract expressionist poet who enjoys random thoughts and directions however hoping for a response from our little group is expecting an awful lot

      if this is the way you deal with everyone all the time I can understand how it must feel like you are an outsider truth be told you are an outsider I assume you’ve chosen that role and it shouldn’t surprise you at the reaction or lack of reaction that you get with your thoughts

      Being a poet is not easy and expecting people to get it is a problem that a lot of poets are challenged with good luck going forward and if you choose to continue to post non-related poetry I’m not sure the response will change much we’re on the trail

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      1. please learn how to respond less hurtful, I just wrote something for all aries phycological a – whole’s called – Chameleon
        we have more the fun scandavien – dip s…
        Phenomenon words are empty like a chameleon
        Elegance
        Over Darkness
        ‘’I enjoy this ‘’
        Hurt another, my imprisoned video, jealous cuz’
        our life grew stronger
        Chameleon
        A gecko
        Thought-ful demons riddle in my head, strategist, activist, writer, holocaust – sly
        with blackmail & a broken heart.
        Don’t just troll us
        we hide thoughts
        Regret soaks in
        Works hard;lack of affection
        ( Perfection )
        Aggravations too eerie
        Chameleon

        Like

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