2021, Family, home, Kids, Mysteries, Uncategorized

Lipstick

47 Comments

Most mornings YA and I share our schedules with each other.  Not specific details down to the hour but general “what I have on my plate for the day” schedules.  On Saturday morning, YA told me she was going to the gym and running a couple of errands.  

I was finishing up cookies and after about an hour I realized that not only had she not left the house, but that I could hear the hair dryer running upstairs.  I was a little surprised as I would never shower and do my hair and makeup (not that I ever wear makeup) before going to work out at the gym.  I always save the shower for AFTER the workout.  I shook my head at what the younger generation gets up to.

It occurred to me that every generation shakes its head at the younger one but then I thought about my mother.  When I was growing up, my mother’s standard lipstick color was flaming red.  If she ever wore another color back then, I wasn’t aware.  And she did not go out in public without it.  I have a very clear memory (probably because it happened so often) of her applying a fresh layer of lipstick in the rearview mirror of the car before getting out to run whatever errand was on her agenda. 

So here am I, stuck between the rearview mirror lipstick application and the showering before the gym generations.  I’m guessing that YA probably has a long list of my actions that she just doesn’t understand.

Any habits of yours that another generation just doesn’t get?

47 thoughts on “Lipstick”

  1. I cannot think of a time in my life when it was not clear to me that my parents found me to be “a mystery, wrapped in an enigma”.

    They clearly had no idea who I was/am and had no problem with saying so. I never questioned why they did things the way they did, because I was taught from birth that the way they did things was “the right way”. By not doing things “the right way”, I was being deviant and would surely be sorry eventually. Why would I not just consistently do things “the right way?”

    I have trouble with the idea that a child of mine really does not care that much how he is dressed. I do understand that it’s just not that important to him. Spending his last year of college and starting his career in the thick of a pandemic is doing nothing to make that a priority. 😀

    I am sure there are plenty of things about me that have him just shaking his head, but he does not let on. I am amazed to find he sometimes even asks for advice. I did not see that coming.

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      1. Tell me about it, and I even ended up having him here for the better part of a year that neither of us was expecting.

        He is now gainfully employed with his own apartment in downtown St Paul (his roommate is a running teammate)!

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  2. My parents did not have expectations beyond doing our part of the work, not flunking in school, and being moral and decent. I did all of that and said little. I think they expected us to not be much like them. My parents reluctantly let me play football, fearing injuries. They came only to the final home game of my senior year, parents night. They were surprised and a little proud, which they even said.
    Mt parenting model was similar. I encouraged my children to find their place, to read widely and think. There were a few specific things we hoped, and for the most part they did those things. Clothing and makeup were never an issue. Music was fine because they listened to many genres and neither likes loud noise so the volume was never an issue. (More on that later, maybe.) We had some difficult moments with our son. (More abvout that later, maybe
    Announcing my new moniker, developed in an attempt to get logged in on mobile devices:

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  3. My parents’ habits and beliefs were a product of their experience and their upbringing. I never had a sense that there was any depth to those beliefs, that they had ever questioned or examined them. They were nice people, but not ones I would engage in deep discussions. I never considered myself to be like them and never expected they would understand my authentic self.

    I have enough trouble understanding the habits and beliefs of a large swath of my own generation (and conversely they fail to understand me) that I pay little attention to younger generations. As the supermarket tabloids remind me, there is a whole world of personalities and controversies about which I know nothing.

    As I have, at this point, become a quaint and inconsequential nonentity, I doubt that the younger generation spends any time at all trying to understand me.

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  4. I remember my mom doing the same thing, though she did change shades of red depending on the outfit..

    I remember myself shaking my head at some of Joel’s music, but then he glommed on to some of the 70s groups (Grateful Dead, Led Zepplin…) and we were fine.

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  5. Closing doors behind me when I enter or leave a building!

    I grew up when there were not very many automatic doors compared with the number we have today. But old buildings usually have old manually operated doors that need to be pulled shut. My favorite coffee shop is a prime example. As I sit there writing on any given day for 3-4 hours, fully one in five people will NOT close the door behind them when they enter or exit. Why is that an issue? In warm weather, flies and other bugs get inside and detract from the eating/drinking/writing/ experience. In winter, an open door lets in cold air!

    Most of the slack jaws are younger people, but enough baby boomers are guilty of the crime that I don’t think it’s a generational thing. I have no explanation other than obtuseness or selfishness or cluelessness or plain old lack of understanding of the operational complexities of doors. work. Pull to open; pull to close. Yep, that’s pretty damn complicated rocket science.

    Chris in Owatonna

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      2. I have also entered a restroom to find that a faucet has been left running full blast. The person who turned it on probably assumed it would go off by itself.

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  6. I don’t remember big issues with my son about clothes. Once we baby boomers had taught the world that denim jeans could be worn anywhere, there wasn’t that much left to fight about, IF your child was a boy. Now I understand that having girls is an entirely different matter.

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  8. My upbringing must have been quite similar to mig’s. My parents were the correct, role model parents – until they weren’t. (When I was a senior in high school my dad decided that whisky would solve all his emotional problems. It didn’t.)

    I was always a little bit deviant and I remain stubborn about “normal” behavior. My dad was angry with me a lot but my mom was mystified at why I refused to be her “mini-me”, later she was annoyed, later still she wanted to be like me – completely independent. For example, I have never had kids which means that I don’t have a generation to be perplexed by my habits. Many people whom I have just met will ask me about my kids in the most friendly and usual way. When I provide the answer I am stared at as if I’m something growing on a Petri dish.

    Sometimes I am lonely, but not often. I thrive in my solitude like moss growing on cool stones in a damp wood. I’m grateful for the peace it brings. Some things are more difficult due to being only one person and not having help but I wouldn’t trade it. Most people don’t understand this at all. Most people need others around them, some people need a lot of others around them. I’m better off as I am and every day I’m grateful for some of the choices that led me to where I am today.

    I have never worn lipstick.

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    1. I have not worn make up for decades. I actually threw away all my make up out in one great snit after watching a television show with an aside comment that women worldwide spend more money on cosmetics every year then is spent on the space program. I don’t know if it’s true or not but it struck a chord and I decided I didn’t need to be part of that insanity.

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  11. Rise and Shine Baboons,

    I really do not want to cover the territory of my mother and feeling unseen. Tooooo much. My son used to wear a fez in high school. He was 6’4” tall and skinny. The fez made him look like a bean stalk. When he was tired of that, he switched to a beret which was good looking on him. I did not ever understand the fez. Self-expression, I guess.

    OT, COVID is not the only nasty bug out there. After Thanksgiving I contracted a virus that has sidelined me for 10 days. Husband also got it but he is back on his feet as of yesterday. I have had 2 negative COVID tests and a negative strep test after finding my throat covered in blisters. That now has subsided, leaving me croaky and tired. I wore a mask almost everywhere. Apparently the biotic culture is rebounding this year after our first year of social isolation.

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  12. Greetings Baboons! I have missed you all! I’m home on a random day off so I popped in. I love lipstick and wearing makeup. I remember my mother doing the same thing — a quick application of lipstick before heading out. But it was probably gone after kissing the foreheads of 7 kids. After she left, we would compare the amount of lipstick left on our faces to determine who was most favored. A silly game as Mom loved us all dearly.

    I don’t understand all the stupid video games my kids (and husband) play nonstop. That to me is just a total waste of time. I just enjoyed watching “Downton Abbey” again on Netflix in preparation for the movie coming out in January. Sigh. Such a lovely show on many levels.

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    2. A daycare provider for my son when he was 1-3rd grade had a terrific birthday tradition. She would paint her lips bright red, then kiss the birthday child on the cheek leaving a lip print. Then she would take a picture of the child with her and send it home. The kids LOVED this. (She also had summertime food fights at the outdoor picnic table featuring jello, peas, and pasta.). Those kids would do anything to cooperate with her activities because it was so much fun for them.

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  13. I just want to say how much I appreciate the song up top. The Who are one of my favorites. I’m looking at the poster of Pete Townsend in my office as I type. We were all so young…

    Just added some files to a ‘group project’ from class. The first and only one we had to do as a group and it just reminds me how much I’d rather work alone. Four of us in a VR lab (Virtual Reality) flying around the world looking up all the things we’ve learned in geology class. One kid wore the headset and ‘flew’. Actually too fast; SLOW DOWN AND LET US PICK OUT THE THINGS WE’RE LOOKING FOR! I was on the computer recording things and directing him. One girl was marking up the images we saved, and the other kid… well… he made a group text chat that no one has responded to but me. The girl submitted a bunch of marked up photos. I submitted a bunch more… we’ll see what the other two get up too. A paper due Sunday and final on Monday and that’s it.

    ….what was the question? Why I have a problem with the younger generation? Haha-

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  14. Struggling to make this work in these devices.
    As a high school teacher you go with the flow and even perhaps appreciate kids for what they each are, as long as they do not interrupt learning, or perhaps embrace generational differences.
    At this point I am wondering if I should have tried to shape my son more, considering how he struggles as an adult. But doubt I would have succeeded. Inter generational issues for me are more about DNA I passed onto my kids, or my wife did. I passed on high sensitivity issues to both children and 2 of 3 grandchildren and also depression to the same 4.
    I did not comment on day Steve died. That morning we got results of lots of study and tests done on 9 year old grandson. He has major issues, for several reasons, not only my genetics. But it was hard being hit with both things that day. Then last Thursday his classmates reported things he mutters to himself about self harm. Ironic for me. My second novel is about people not accepting adolescent depression. Then here is a 9 year old. Lots of reasons for this too.

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  18. HS students are always looking for their group, their niche, their interest group, their place. Most students without that place, almost all, are very unhappy. When computers came into school, first in rudimentary form that required intelligence and reading and experimenting. Thus a whole new niche developed for students, many without a place. Computer games are like that , within reason . How is that terrible, yet watching all the sports stuff is ok. Or building a music collection and going to concerts, or all the other places people enrich their lives, within reason, and find friends, and keep their mind active.

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  19. my parents were very good and excepting of my ways from the time I was two and going forward. they treated me like I had a reason for my eccentricities and always allowed for them
    during high school I had the curious habit of sleeping until 30 seconds before it was time to walk out the door but I had a routine where I could roll out of bed slide into my jeans my sandals and my shirt on the way out the door without needing more than the 30 seconds to do that my mom was the art teacher at my high school so I rode with her until I was old enough to have a car and after proving that 30 seconds was all I needed it never came up again today it takes me 45 minutes if i’m flying. shower tea cats dogs fish and now i grab a couple eggs and a adder of taters, chili or something with some bulk to give me fuel to launch into go mode
    I do have some quirky stuff I can’t be around crunching of potato chips or ice and that makes life a bit challenging sometime especially visiting the in-laws
    my kids were always pretty good and didn’t shake their heads too hard at my stuff and I tried to give them all enough free reign to be their own person as well
    my first son insisted on wearing kelly green pants with white shoes and his tension release was sucking on the sleeve or neck of his sweatshirt
    My daughters idiosyncrasies were that she would walk into a room kick off her shoes stick her thumb in her mouth and be happy as a clam wherever she watch she would I have a curiosity about life that would keep herk up until the rest of the house needed to go to sleep and then she would reluctantly go to sleep this is kind of followed her through life the next kid was into everything he played baseball basketball football hockey soccer cello trumpet guitar karate and swimming and was pretty good at most of them he now sits in the basement with playstation and podcasts and has a huge social life on his monitors down there

    the next kid loved whatever was presented as long as she got time to do her pretend play acting either in her room or in the backseat of the car or she would have a little one acts that she would conjure up and share with herself
    The last kid knew what she wanted went for it until she got it and she still does her quirk is until she is ready to go public she likes to have it be her own solo creation

    now my grandkids enter and the poor little suckers , they think everything i say is the correct take on the universe and quite honestly i feel the same way about what they bring
    ari wakes up flying out of the gate ready for whatever comes his way
    denver is the happiest being on the planet. almost makes you wonder how that’s possible.
    what has he got to be so happy about. then that makes you wonder if ari has just cause to be that enthusiastic about his day
    we all come at it differently and my way is right for me and my favorite thing is learning about how others figure out and respond to their calling
    ain’t life grand
    today’s quote
    we might know more than we know we know

    wouldn’t it be grand

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