Today’s post comes from Wally, proprietor of Wally’s Intimida – home of the world’s largest SUV, the Sherpa.
Hello potential Sherpa buyers! I am intensely interested in you as long as you don’t have a Sherpa Sport Utility Vehicle. Because you represent a challenge to me – I simply can’t comprehend why you haven’t bought an Intimida yet!
I see that in the wake of Hurricane Sandy and the 2012 election, east coast people feel empowered to go car buying. Not just shopping – buying! That’s how they do things out east – if the car is busted, they don’t mess around. Fix it or replace it. Boom! And what better vehicle to get as your Hurricane Response Car than a Sherpa from Intimida! The Sherpa is massive and immovable – as stubborn as Republicans when it comes to Taxing the Rich!
For you non-natural-disaster-victims (just wait!), the Sherpa is still a great buy because it can be ordered with the new Curiosity package to mimic all the great options that came factory-installed on NASA’s Mars Curiosity Rover! The Sherpa Curiosity has back up cameras, move forward cameras, coming-down-from-the-sky cameras, and just looking around cameras.
And it’s got its own Fracking Package, complete with a soil sampling shovel, a collapsible front-mounted drill rig, roof derrick and portable high pressure injection components. Now, when your Sherpa’s gas tank dwindles to “empty” in the forsaken wilderness of western North Dakota, you can roll out the necessary equipment to test, puncture, and fill the Earth with water sand and chemicals to force natural gas and petroleum out of the cracks between the shale.
And with its own onboard refinery, the Sherpa can turn that oil into fuel that will make it possible for you to leave North Dakota under your own power!
Imagine that – you’ll never have to stop at a gas pump again – just use the Sherpa’s hydraulic assist to insert your mechanical straw into the ground like you would push it through a plastic lid. Then simply draw energy out in the same way you might take a drink from a giant Slurpee! A giant Slurpee that happens to be on fire!
Your onboard shovel might also dig up signs of organic material underneath your Sherpa – something the Mars Curiosity Rover has not yet been able to do! And unlike the Rover, the Sherpa has the ability to kill everything it passes over – even stuff that was never alive to begin with, like cold, red Martian sand.
Hurricane Sandy and the Mars Lander make it official – America is car crazy again! Go out and buy one today – immediately! I mean it – don’t think too much. ACT!
I’m waiting to see you in the showroom.
Your friend,
Wally
Describe a memorable impulse buy. One that turned out to be good!
Trail Baboon 
Here goes. About 25 years ago, I’d been on Prozac for a few years for depression. One day, I decided to just quit taking it and within a few hours, I’d never felt better in my life. So good that I thought I could do anything. Like dream up a special training program for 3M and just walk in and sell it good. Other things I did during this brief period of drug withdrawal- induced mania are simply too embarrassing to share, but my “grand Prozac moment” is worth divulging.
We needed a new used car at that time, so I withdrew our entire life savings of $7500 and set out to find a car dealership to make the purchase. On the way, I passed Schmidt Music, turned around, and went into the store. I looked around until I spotted a ivory-colored baby grand piano and sat down to play. A sales associate approached me, asking if he could help me. I chirped, “Yes!! I want to buy this piano now!” That’s right; I bought a grand piano instead of a used car. Besides the pleasure occasionally playing it has brought me over the intervening years, it’s the one really expensive purchase I’ve ever made that hasn’t depreciated. In fact, compared to the only other high-priced purchase of a 2-margarita Cabo san Lucas time share, this baby grand was a far wiser investment than the time share or a used car!
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You can even take shelter underneath it in case of an earthquake! Think of the neat forts that grandchildren could make with it.
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I’m gonna remember that investment advice, and share it with Husband!
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Almost everything in our 47 years of married life. We dated for 10 days, and decided to get married, which we did 6 weeks later. I switched jobs twice that way–on our way to do something else and ended up taking a quick job offer. Which is how I ended up back in TH and then down here in Mankato. Went to look for a rental in TH and instead an hour later bought a cabin on Lake Superior. Never intended to keep the house, and suddenly had a bank loan to expand it.Bought four of our cars when we were not even shopping much less car shopping. Had my wife’s wedding ring and diamond necklace made into one new ring when we were only having the ring cut off (last month). An endless list of other things. I regret a VW bus we bought that way, only for the $; otherwise loved it.
Does this apply? My wife could not get pregnant. We were within 6 months of receiving a child when she was suddenly, surprisingly pregnant. Almost took the adopted child, too. This was back before there was a shortage of children to adopt.
I had a colleague who was the grandmaster impulse buyer. He could go out to the grocery store and come home with a horse, when he lived in town and had no place to keep it. Any big used old used thing, like a garage or an old boiler, he had to have on sight. He once owned three long campers for that reason. One way and another he almost always came out ahead and he sure had fun.
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My current vehicle is a Scion XB, you know the little black box on wheels. This I researched and picked out carefully. But the test drive was to see how easily my wife could get in and out of it. Best car on the road for that!. But when I park in parking lots, every other car is an Intimida. Backing out is sheer risk. I park beyond where most cars are parked, but when I come out , especially this time of year, I have a 3/4 ton extended cab pickup (the most popular vehicle in Mankato–not kidding, salesmen will tell you it is) on one side of me and on the other side a big SUV or extended van or service truck. Even when we park in the handicap spots we are surrounded by over-sized monsters.
Upstairs to ride my intidating non-intimida stationary recumbent bike, on which I will this morning reach 5800 miles for the year, total of all bike riding. More than two hours of sleep would make the prospect of the ride more fun.
Crawl out bed and be a zombie, Babooners!
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What will you hit in December for miles to enf the year? 6000 too easy 6500 is pushing it.
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In theory, right around 6200, except I will lose several days now, for Christmas and some driving of Sandy to various places.
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Very impressive Clyde. Good job!
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I’ve been slipping on the exercise front. I bow down to your diligence.
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Great job bicycling, Clyde!
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Good morning. I am usually careful about what I buy. I do have a lot of stuff that I thought were good purchases and they weren’t. In a book store my careful buying habit can sometimes disappear. Some of those books bought on impulse turned out to be not so good.
I almost always check out the books in the gardening section. I usually know what I am looking for when it comes to gardening books. I do have one very good gardening book that I bought without knowing anything about it. This book is Parsnips in the Snow by Staw and Swander. It is a collection of stories about gardeners. They picked out some excellent gardeners to interview. I read this book many years ago and I have forgotten most of the details of the stories, but I know I found them very interesting. I usually only read a book once only, but this is a book I should read a second time.
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Greetings! I usually try to avoid impulse buys because of money issues, but this summer I did it. Jim was getting ready to return to college and we had just gotten his loan (which was to go for living expenses). We were at Office Max looking at tablet computers and fell in love with them. Loved the Asus tablet so much, we bought 2 of them (on a great sale, BTW). It does practically everything a desk computer does along with all the Droid mobile apps you can get for phones, take pictures, listen to music, watch Netflix, read Kindle books, etc., and it’s only 1/4″ thick! Amazing device. Yeah, maybe I should have spent the money more wisely, but it gets used so much more than any other computing device at home and I totally enjoy having my “own” device because Jim uses his all the time as well for school. Definitely a good purchase.
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Morning all!
I’m off traveling again so have been off-Trail the last few days. I’m sure I probably have an impulse buy that worked out, or even didn’t work out, but I’ll have to think on it for a while. Like J & J, I’m not a big impulse buyer… money is always chronically short around our place. I like to say that my picture is in the dictionary margin next to the word “house poor”!
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Way OT: has anyone here ever gone to the Arboretum Tea? I am thinking of taking Sandy. Wanted more details than they give. It’s on several times.
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I went last year, Clyde, with three female friends. It’s very nice. What specifically are wanting to know?
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Was it open serving, buffet style? Are you there for the whole time. How loud does it get? Was everything gluten based?
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It is not a buffet. They bring to your table a tiered serving thingy that has the treats allotted to your table. As to the gluten issue, I suspect that if you tell them ahead of time, they can accommodate you, but I don’t know that for a fact. The tea is held in the main dining room, I didn’t find the noise level disturbing at all. It was a very nice meal, in a nicely decorated room, really a lovely affair. Hope that helps.
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Helps a lot. My wife loves high teas. She went to four or five in England, including Herrods. My daughter and I gave her a surprise high tea here, with 13 of her friends, our daughter, and granddaughter Lily, then 7. It lasted 2 1/2 hours, 23 courses. One of the highlights of my wife’s life, and Lily’s. So I think I will see if we can get in next Thursday. I will just have to bet she will not have an attack. It’s me who does not do gluten and avoids loud noises, not her. Thanks.
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Just had another “problem.:” Just missed having to go to the ER. Guess I better not order tickets.
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Seems to me I just saw one of those driving down the road yesterday. Wally’s Intimida West-pretty catchy name for a new dealership! I was wondering what that new construction right across from our vet’s office was going to be used for. Now I know. Thanks, Dale. Even though we here in the West have all the oil as well as a refinery in Bismarck, gas is much cheaper in Fargo. I don’t get it. I suppose our terrain in winter with no snow resembles the surface of Mars. God forsaken? Well, I don’t think I would say that! The god of the Republicans is in the oil patch with bells on (at least the Republicans think so).
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OT, sorry, but speaking of the oil in ND reminded me. A student here at the college has dropped out because he’s out in ND painting houses and making money hand over fist. Doesn’t want to come back to school here until the money runs out there.
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i met a guy in flooring who says he doesnt have time for anythig because he is so busy with flooring products . i suggested he go to the oil fields and he hadnt thought of that before. i bet he will be there before long
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There are rumors galore in the oil patch that “Obama is going to shut down the fracking”, a rumor I believe is spread by the oil companies to instill fear and pro-Republican sentiment in the oilworkers. It was especially rampant before the election. I think it is highly unlikely that fracking will be stopped. More regulated, maybe, but not stopped.
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UND is now studying whether injecting carbon dioxide would work for fracking as a less toxic alternative to the chemicals.
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How would they generate the carbon dioxide and where would it end up if it was used for fracking? Fracking is a way of extracting more oil which will increase global warming when it is burned. Carbon dioxide is one of the primary greenhouse gases that is created by burning oil which increases global warming. Using carbon dioxide to do fracking seem like it might result in an additional increase in the release of this greenhouse gas if using it for fracking actually adds to the release of this gas into the air. To solve the problems of global warming we need to use less oil and not do things like fracking to extract more of in from the ground.
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I agree with you Jim.
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Didn’t all those episodes of Star Trek where civilzations messed with their planets in this way and then had to live w/ the disasters it caused teach us anything?
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the tea party has proof those episodes dont exist
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As I’ve mentioned, you always have to be a little careful when buying original artworks off of ebay. But, occasionally, I roll the dice on what could be a ‘hidden gem’ and it is usually an impulse type of situation. It almost has to be because there are so many people looking…
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Did you see the small article in yesterday’s Pioneer press about the woman who bought a Calder lithograph valued at $9,000.00 for $2.34 at Goodwill?
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i did. nice piece too
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Yeah, I saw that. Nice!
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Aaaaaaaaand speaking of which… Just impulse bought a charcoal sketch that supposedly/hopefully is an original done by Collier’s/Esquire cover artist/cartoonist Jaro Fabry. The seller says it was done for sculptor, Paul Kasper, in 1942-3. It ~looks~ like an original and his work. We’ll see how it looks when it gets here…
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cool
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Morning–
I’m just not an impulsive type of guy about anything… ‘Impuslive’ for me means I only thought about it for an hour and not two hours.
Either that or I’ve forgotten it!
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I’m with you, Ben. Impulsive behavior is extremely rare. I have to consider every pro and con along with all alternatives before I decide anything. One of the cons for purchasing anything is that it costs money!
This tendency prevents some actions that may be regrettable but probably prevents some wonderful surprises, too.
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I’m close to being the same as you, Ben, mainly for the same reason that Lisa stated. I do go a little crazy and stray off into the impulsive area on rare occasions.
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Wally used to sound vaguely like a car dealer in Two Harbors, who happened to be a very moral car dealer, very nice man, who had the slightly lisping lilting quality JEP gave Wally. But the joy was that it was name after him and thus was called Bacon Motors. Fun to play with Bacon Motors, especially since Mr Bacon and all his many Bacon kin were devoted Seventh Day Adventists and did not eat pork.
Bacon Motors would work as a name for a Sherpa dealer.
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My son has a funny create-your-own-credit-card-picture covered with sausages. My vegetarian DIL carries the same card but thinks that the irony is funny. She’s not a vegetarian for ethical reasons (just doesn’t like the taste). If she were an ethical vegetarian, she would probably not find it funny at all.
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You’re right, Clyde.
And it exists – in Forest Lake!
http://www.baconsmotors.com/
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Wow. I should have looked. But in Forest Lake no less, a town in which I bought two cars, but long before this place opened. Could easily be a relative.
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the problem with my impulse buys is that thye are all great but what the heck do you do with them? i have a warehouse full of good deals i need to deal with. be careful what you wish for. i got another good deal just last night on ebay i will set in the stack next to my other good deals
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If the new Sherpa ever broke down and caused you headaches, you could curse it by calling it a fricking-fracking Sherpa!
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Well, there is another f word could add into that name. I guess we don’t use that f word here.
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In the latest version of the SciFi channel’s remake of “Battlestar Galactica”, their bad, bad swear word of choice was FRACK and all other forms of the word.
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It was in the original series too, though then it meant “sh*t” or even just “rats”, instead of substituting for the F word like it does in the most recent series.
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OH, shards.
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A Lou Grant show was based on a real court case about a play on trial for indecency. The question at hand was how indecent were the words. So that everyone did not have to say the words, the judge produced a list; then everyone could just look at the list and refer to a number. It produced many funny lines. People were calling other “a real number 5” and to “just go 7.” Or asking people if they wanted to “9.” A witness in court, chosen to be an average citizen was given the list and asked what her reaction was. She said something like “Well, 1 through 4 aren’t. 5, well my kids say that. 6, my husband says that all the time. I don’t like 7 to 10. 11, my husband and I do that. 13, can you do that?” The publisher called Lou and another editor in and asked them what 28 was and they had to in embarrassment admit they did not know what it meant. It was one of the funniest shows ever put on TV.
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And they spelled it “frak” instead 🙂 I find myself saying this and then I’m surprised when I find out how many other people have watched BG.
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I do impulse buys all the time, and they turn out fine mostly – but they’re mostly in thrift shops…
Gotta run – last day with out of town guests.
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I got a coupon for a free book from Shutterfly. So I spent the afternoon putting together a collection of some of our favorite photos from the North Shore, family and scenery. Since so many of the pictures were not of the highest quality, I made them small and got an amazing number in. I was doing it only for us, but it did not cost that much to do two additional copies for my two children. My daughter is a whiz at Shutterfly. Cranks out fun books. Makes us a calendar every year, and always some other fun thing, last year a small sketchbook for me and a prayer log for Sandy. It is am amazing age.
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I bought my dog, Bailey, now gone, on impulse. I did it for the worst possible reason. I had been assaulted by the last man I’d dated and hadn’t gone out with anyone for a couple of years. A very nice guy started asking me out and I liked him but I was really nervous and panicky – no, I was downright neurotic about it. Tom called me and asked me to come over for a bonfire one Saturday night. I panicked and made up the first excuse that came to mind, “Oh, I found a puppy and I’m going to go pick him up tonight.” I had been looking for a dog after the troubling incident and had read up on the Cavalier King Charles Spaniel breed. I’d found a breeder in Wisconsin and was considering it but I probably wouldn’t have behaved so impulsively if Tom hadn’t asked me to come over. I really wasn’t ready to date so that was for the best. I don’t think I needed to actually go pick Bailey up in Wisconsin and pay for him – very impulsive, even for me – but I did and I’ll never regret it. He was the sweetest, most loving dog anyone could ever have. He loved me unconditionally from the moment I brought him home and he died in my arms of complications from a defective mitral valve.
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Best kind of impulse buy. I have several impulse acquisitions like that, but of the feline variety, and not involving any monetary exchange.
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