Federal regulators have busted a work-from-home-scam that did not actually help anyone work from home. The people who signed up received no gainful employment except perhaps the unpleasant job of trying to figure out where their money went. This is the type of business you used to see touted on flyers stuck to telephone poles – back before the internet became a worldwide staple-ready blank space.
The notices usually said something like this:
Work Without Leaving Home!
Earn Unlimited Dollars In Your Pajamas!
This idea of making a living without having to leave the house has always carried a special allure for me because I am a natural introvert and a lifetime member of Persons Anonymous – a social support group for the low and no profiled. We attract and retain members by having it as a defining article in our charter that we never actually meet. But if we ever did get together, I’m certain the Persons Anonymous membership would discover that we, as a group, have been disappointed by “work from home” scams at a much higher rate than members of the general (sociable) population. And chief among those disappointments would be the realization that “work from home” is not the same thing as “work alone” or “work without having to interact with other people”. Some of these “work from home” scenarios involve making cold sales calls, or answering the phone, or dropping your pajamas on the floor and picking up your money on the dresser.
In fact, this past weekend’s arrests may confirm that the only way to truly make money in your pajamas is as a sleepwear model. The sole requirement – that you look fetching in drawstring pants, appealing in a terrycloth bathrobe and ravishing in adult onesies – an easy reach for Baboons, especially when they do your hair, apply the make up, and turn on the fans.
But of course you’d have to leave the house to go to the shoot.
Drat.
What business have you (or would you) run out of your home?
i have run a business form my ho,e for most of my life. i sell stuffand need and office but no one ever comes there.years ago when i was ging through a divorce i was in an office building with a reception room and an office . i had a bathroom down the hall and access to a loading dock for shipments of samples and products. i drove past apartment complexes on my way to the office and when it became apparent i was going to need to find a new place to live i was able to move into a 1000 sq ft one bedroom apartment with an area that they thought would be the dining room that held my desk erfectly. right next to that was the kitchen and living room. around the corner was my bedroom and bathroom and dwn the hall was a pool raquetball court underground parking and a party room all for the same price as the little reception room and a small office.
prior to that my dad and i had shared an office with his former partner and shared a secratary and warehouse because it was a carryover from their former partnership. when taht dissolved it didnt make sense to pay a lot of money to put on a suit and drive to an office. i still slipped on a sports coat when i went on sales presentations but i put togetehr a lot of quotes and answered a lot of phones in my pajamas
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today i have a warehouse to ship big stuff out of and it works out well for me to have a place to store the 1000 or so hats i have for sale on ebay. it came with an office but i told them i didnt need it . i still do a lot of my stuff in the living room rather than the warehouse.
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The 1000 Hats of Tim … Didn’t Seuss write that?
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One of my favorite childhood books. The hats at the very end were spectacular.
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I would not be a good work-from-home candidate. I am by nature a shy person, but an extroverted shy person. I need to be with people. When I was between jobs a few years back, I wound up making regular coffee dates and appointments to go out and do informational interviews sometimes just for the human contact. There are days I could work from home, but go into the office anyway simply to be with people.
I am presently running a Girl Scout cookie franchise from my dining room table, but that is only temporary work, though the pay is delicious. I have grand dreams of writing the Great American Novel at my dining room table, but that’s hardly a legitimate business proposition (and more of a pipe dream at this stage in my life than anything I could actually get done…). Hmm. Girl Scout cookies. If I buy up enough stock, I could create a black market for them long about August when a frozen Thin Mint is just about the perfect food…hmm….
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Oh Anna, I , too, am an extroverted shy person. I need people around. When I was at home this past week it was just me and my dad at home, and he sleeps a lot, so I was more or less by myself most of the time. It was nice for a few days, but I was ready for some company by the end of the trip. I don’t think I would like to run a therapy office out of my home. I like my clients but i really don’t want them or their relatives to know where I live
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I agree with your choice of perfect food–love those Thin Mints.
At first when I read, “Extroverted Shy Person,” I thought What? Then I realized this is a perfect description of me, too.
Anna, Renee, and Jacque forrn a new personality configuration “ESP” No wonder we know what will happen next!
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My wife is introverted gregarious. No, seriously. She is.
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I like ESP for “Extroverted Shy Person”. Clyde, your wife needs one more letter for her acronym. Maybe she could hang out with some other IG’s and kick around a few ideas. RIG – Randomly Introverted Gregarious?
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I like Fully Introverted Gregarious or Wisely . . . or Dourly . . . What about Zany Introverted Gregarious-Zestfully Awkwardly Gregarious
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Well done, both of you!
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Some of the permanent employees at my current assignment have laptops and can work from home when the weather is bad. I’m quite envious. I could do part of my current job from home, but I’d have to haul letters for mailing to the building a few times a week, unless they gave me my own metering machine or several sheets of stamps at a time. I don’t know what business I could run from home except for writing, and being a poet usually gets you a handful of copies of whatever magazine your poem is in, not cold hard cash. A friend of mine is a fantastic bookbinder and works mainly at home, but she also teaches at workshops around the country and meets with clients at their houses. Also, her workshop is in the basement, so pajamas would probably be pretty chilly to spend the day in. Probably no colder than I was this morning, walking three blocks from the train to the office…
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Good morning. I operated my own crop consulting business from my home. Most of my work was done out in farmers’ fields with some work done out of the office that my Dad built for me in our basement. I did a lot of my work at home on the main floor of our house because I felt closed in down in the basement. However, my office equipment, supplies, and records were kept in the office. I had hoped to develop my crop consulting business into a full time job. That didn’t happen and I ended up looking for a full time job away from home.
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RISE AND WORK FROM HOME BABOONS!
Like Anna, I am not a candidate to work from home all the time. I like it for 2-3 days, then I am crawling the walls. I do work from home on Fridays, where I can work uninterrupted. At the office, if my door is open, there is immediately someone in the doorway. However, my work habits at home are terrible–I start with honorable intentions, then throw in a load of laundry, then I clean something, then I unload the dishwasher…..and soon the day is gone, the house is tidy, and the work tasks remain undone.
If I was selling stuff from a home office like tim does, I would STARVE!
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Dale, interesting selection of careers–radio personality–for an extreme introvert. How did you pull that off?
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I’m not sure that is uncommon. Maybe it is like the stutterer who can’t talk but can sing (John Gorka) or act (James Earl Jones). And then there is Garrison Keillor, a shy guy who can’t stop talking.
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Steve is right, Jacque. I think radio attracts introverts. There is just enough of a curtain to hide behind, and truth be told, the very notion of a Public Radio Personality (PRP) would seem laughable to people who don’t listen. Public Radio’s reputation in the real world is that we are bland – the opposite of what you would consider a personality.
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Sorry to break it to you, Dale, but you and Jim Ed were NOT bland. I knew that you were a character when you came back from your first vacation after starting the Morning Show and showed us, the radio audience SLIDES of your vacation.
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Darling Husband is an Extreme Introvert – but will natter on with folks who call to do surveys or to talk to us about their candidate of choice. He will talk to total strangers for hours if they know something that he is interested in. Put him in a room full of people at a party and he will go all clammy and be stymied about what to say or do (he’d much rather be at home by himself with his computer for company). Put him on the phone with one of those party people and he will be contentedly entertained for hours (or at least a good 30 minutes). Just as good: find someone who he can pepper with questions about something science-related and tuck them off in a corner and he’s good for the night.
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Well, we have discussed the work we might or might not do, but what about the pajamas?
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Morning–
Farming- the ultimate ‘work from home’ business! Pajamas?? Well…. not really recommended work wear unless it’s got the reinforced knees and steel toed footsies. And stain/grease resistant would be a benefit.
I have an office down in the basement. But mostly the accounting bookwork now is done with a laptop and a plastic bag on the kitchen table. Files are still down in the basement office. Along w/ last years plastic bag. (One of these days I need to get that organized…)
Taxes for farmers are due 2/28. But since the majority of my income isn’t from farming anymore I get until 4/15 like everyone else.
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Although I guess it depends on what you’re wearing for PJ’s.
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I once had a seasonal job with the IRS, taking phone calls from people looking for forms and publications. I had a computer and a phone with headset in the dining room. It wasn’t the most exciting work, but as a temp job I found it wonderful. I didn’t have to leave the house on days when the weather was cold or snowy, although I usually did go out for a walk around lunchtime. On my afternoon break I’d start something like a bolognese sauce, or meat loaf and scalloped potatoes, or chicken tikka masala, and then the house would smell wonderful during the last couple of hours of my shift.
It was also the best-paid job I’d ever had, not counting self-employment.
My least favorite rule was that you weren’t supposed to have pets in the room with you while you were working. They didn’t want the callers to know that it wasn’t a call center they were talking to. It was one of those “this call may be monitored for quality assurance” situations, but I reasoned that if Sammy meowed while I was on the phone, and there happened to be someone monitoring, they wouldn’t know whose end of the call the meow came from unless the caller mentioned it. So I took a chance.
I had actually hoped when I took the job that the cats would find it a nice opportunity to snooze on my lap during the day, but that didn’t work out. Turns out they’ll do that if I am working quietly on a computer, but not if I am talking on the phone.
I worked in my pajamas once or twice, but most of the time I got dressed before my shift.
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A drone repair and maintenance business might be a winner in the 21s Century. Drones that only needed a tune up could fly themselves to my garage, and those unable to fly would be hauled in by bigger drones. The best part would come the moment I hand the drone its repair bill. Because a drone isn’t human, it would either not understand the concept of overcharging, or if it did, the complaint would come in the form of a monotonic diatribe from a little speaker box with a voice sounding like either Stephen Hawking or Siri.
Scenario 1: (Voice of S. Hawking) “Two hours of labor to fix the electro-gyro-guidance-propulsion module??? I developed my theory that black holes emit radiation in less than two hours! My dead grandmother could’ve fixed it in half the time.”
(Me) “That’s because your dead grandma would have had the common sense to check the powerquark laser steering fluid level on a regular basis. Take it up with your drone master, bud.” I shove the pricing chip into the drone’s payment transmitter and chew on the stub of my noxious cigar.
Scenario 2: (Voice of Siri) “I couldn’t find anything about electro-gyro-guidance-propulsion modules in your area, but here are some nearby options.” She bats her eyelashes and generates a few electro tears that trickle down her cybercheek. “Couldn’t you give a poor dronette a break? Maybe we can work out some sort of deal?”
(Me) “Sorry, cupcake, you ain’t my type. You remind me of my high-school English teacher. Couldn’t stay awake for ten minutes in her class.” I shove the pricing chip into the dronette’s payment transmitter and chew on the stub of my noxious cigar.
Chris in Owatonna
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Very interesting, Chris! I think you have a good starting point for a new TV mini series. The guy chewing on the stub of the cigar talking to the voice from the drone reminds me of some of the characters found in those series.
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When do you think this stuff up, Chris?
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Barb,
I think the *cough* inspiration comes from extreme fatigue and the slap in the face this weather gave me last night when I returned from a trip to Phoenix. Plus, I recently got an iPhone and have been forcing myself to use it so I can learn what its best uses are. I asked Siri and she helped my group find a fantastic Cajun restaurant, Pappadeaux Seafood Kitchen, yesterday on the spur of the moment. Pretty cool even for a non-techno-geek.
Chris
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Love the idea, Chris. Maybe in the future a sky full of drones will deliver all the supplies we need to work from home, and they will take away the finished products. And you can do the repairs after they collide overhead and fall to the ground in pieces (with pizzas, which they will also deliver)!
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There are those that relish the idea of delivery of goods by drone and a sky full of drone deliveries: “Like skeet shooting with prizes!” they say.
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And I’ll bet the pizzas will still be delivered, late, cold, and with the cheese stuck to the top of the box. 🙂
Chris
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I actually run my little stamping business out of my home. Emphasis on the “little”. This involves way too many rubber stamps, scads of paper, ribbons, ink pads and tape. But since it’s a teeny business, I can manage it out of the house.
At my regular office, everyone except me is all wired to work from home. But this is all working on their own time as our company abolished telecommuting about the time that Yahoo did. I don’t want to work at home… and I don’t think I’d be that good at it. It would be way too easy for me to say “I’m going to go plant the side garden… I’ll catch up later” or “I’m going to finish reading this last two chapters… I’ll catch up later.” Then I’d be catching up at 2 a.m.!
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The pits is when you try and run a business from home AND you still have to go out to work. Did this with my one wall of books in the shop of a friend (Barbara’s Books) back in the 90s, and again doing downsizing with people in early 2000s (Space Wizard). First time I was happy when her shop folded and I could stop spending seemingly all my time on the books. Second time I never really registered it or anything, just eventually found that I was doing more counseling than anything…
So I never got to work in pjs.
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I did that for a year or so, BiR. My work-at-home part involved recording narration for a radio series called Brain Talk.
I’d spend a day at the office and then come home and go into my closet to record the voice over for this short feature. Then I’d send the audio off to the producer who put it all together. My time spent on it was only around an hour, once a week, but it paid as well as a full day’s work!
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It is interesting to see how many of us are shy introverts, although some of us disguise that better than others. I never chose to work at home. But if you are fired it is better to say you are working at home than to admit the harsher truth. I had no trouble finding the discipline to work at home (which is sometimes described as “working halfway between your refrigerator and your bed”). My problem was loneliness. People don’t generally appreciate how many of their friends are people they work with or encounter while on the job. The longer I worked at home, the more friends I lost (death, moved to another city, etc). And there wasn’t a workplace to give me contacts that could turn into new friendships. I didn’t meet a lot of people in my basement during the 25 or so years I worked there.
I anticipated some of that when I began working at home. What I didn’t anticipate is all the ways working at home contributed to my divorce. Working at home sure feels good on those nasty days when ordinary folks have to commute to offices, driving in bad traffic and wintry snows. On the whole, I would have been happier working in an office with other people.
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True, Steve. There are places set up specifically for people who could work alone at home, but need the energy of an office with co-workers about to stay engaged and sane. Co Co in St. Paul’s Lowertown is one that comes to mind.
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I am working at Co Co in Lowertown right now! I love it! (Although I sometimes work at the Co Co offices in Mpls Downtown or Uptown.) It’s perfect for me. At home there are too many things I would rather do, and too many things I should be doing. I don’t get much done there. OTOH, I’m reading your blog when I should be working!
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I hear you, Steve. I work at home and find the isolation to be the biggest downside. I resolved that by going out regularly to work (anywhere I can get wi-fi can be a workplace) at a coffee shop or even the library to see and hear others and communicate a bit. I find the background noise more stimulating that the dead quiet at home.
Chris in Owatonna
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I wish I could wasit in waiting rooms at my house. Between appointments right now. But will be done before blizzard hits.
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The storms seem relentless in the middle third of MN these past weeks.
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Unlike the rest of you, this is my LAST Mn winter! That allows me to be relaxed in spite of how awful it has been.
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Baboons do not gloat.
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No new snow in this it says but lots to blow around in very high winds. It is very cold out there right now. Sitting in B&N warming up waiting for new prescriptions to be filled.
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I don’t know where I read it, but I have read in several places that being introverted does not mean that you don’t like to talk…you aren’t necessarily shy if introverted or not shy if extroverted.
Anyway…I tried selling used books on the internet from home for a while. Big mistake. Liking books and liking to see people find the “right book” did not make me a good business person. Most of the work was at best extremely boring (entering information about the books) or terrifying (anything to do with money or legal aspects of running your own business). And there was no satisfaction of seeing how delighted people were to find the book for which they were looking…no interactions between me and my customers, since I did it all through abebooks. It was a huge relief when I decided to quit.
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Good to know, Edith! I had considered trying something like this at one time.
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It is also really hard to make any money when you are competing with those people who practically give away books (asking price $1 or less plus shipping). Most shoppers will go for the cheapest book even if the description is described as “Standard Used Condition. May have library markings” (which means they just copied the same description for all of their books) while I tried to actually look at each book and describe its condition accurately.
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I’ve worked from home for almost 30 years and I love it. You can’t beat the overhead or the 20% of your home expenses deducted from earnings. On snowy days when clients have to cancel, I’m not left worrying about paying the high rent for an office AND I can just do all my favorite activities (what I’d be doing on off-hours anyway). Also, there’s no commute or dressing up. It’s pretty ideal other than the compelling thought of having others with whom to interact. Since I’ve rarely had a job in the real world, however, I’m not very familiar with what it’d be like to work with others.
It’s worth noting that the kind of work I do involves dealing with intimate stories and emotions. Who needs what used to be called “soap operas”? I have humans coming to me and sharing the challenges of their lifetimes. I just don’t think it’d be the same if the work was telemarketing. I have great passion for the privilege of going on the journeys with people who are distressed by where they find themselves. For me, there’s no desire to retire. Ever (unless dementia sets in!). When I don’t have clients coming, I can lay out in the sun or clean a closet. Or, take a nap.
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Congratulations on making it work at home, Crystalbay. Naps should always be an option, wherever you work. I can’t tell you how many office problems would have been solved if I could have told a particular person to go take a nap.
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Have you done much sunbathing lately?
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I think I’ve talked about this before, but for several years back in the ’80s, Robin and I had a home business manufacturing props for commercial photographers. We also had kids at home and full time jobs, so most of our work took place between the time when the kids went to bed and about 1:00 AM.
This was before photoshop was available, so photographers needed “real” props in their photos. Our specialty was small seasonal fruits. Whenever a photographer had a job that required fresh raspberries or blueberries or cherries or strawberries and thosw fruits were for whatever reason unavailable, they would contact us. We had a limited stock of those on hand and could ship them FedEx or deliver them in person if the photographer was local. We also rented our fruit, the day rate being about 25% of the purchase price. Our fruit was sufficiently photo-realistic that we were able to develop a national reputation. I also did special orders and in the time we were doing it, I produced artificial peaches (whole, halved and slices), apricots, lima beans and acerola cherries. I also built artificial beds of glowing coals for photographers working on barbecue shots and once I built a chocolate volcano that spewed chocolate chips.
It was just too much, though. The money was pretty good for a cottage industry- the materials were cheap, mostly wax and polyester resin, and the fact that a multi-thousand dollar photo shoot hinged on the availability of the facsimile fruit we provided meant we could pretty much name our price. But, as I said, it was always on a rush basis and we were working through the night so we decided to close it down.
These days photographers would achieve the same thing with stock photography and photoshop, so we got out at a good time.
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Bill, I hope at least once you got to go into your day job and tell your co-workers “I’m beat. I was up all night making fake apricots.”
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And that the yellow pages people created a category just for you: “Rentals – Faux Fruit”.
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I for one am happy to know a good source for adult onesies. Thanks, Dale.
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I’ll have you know it’s hard work being a pajama model!
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