Category Archives: Songs

Songs, Uncategorized

Casey Einstein

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Today is both the birthday of Casey Jones (1863) the brave engineer, and Albert Einstein (1879), the Nobel Prize winning physicist and brainy icon.

There are a couple of famous songs about Casey Jones. This one is by Johnny Cash.

And there’s this not very well known song about Albert Einstein.

But there’s no song at all that combines the two of them.

Well I’m gonna tell you if you insist
Of an engineer who was a physicist
Casey Einstein was the fella’s name
With some fancy calculations, boys, he won his fame.

The Dean called Casey at a quarter to 8
Put him on a train, said “Don’t be late.”
He was goin’ to Stockholm with some other guys
And they’d all be comin’ back here with the Nobel Prize.

C. Einstein, no one else is greater.
C. Einstein, no one else can be compared.
C. Einstein didn’t need a calculator
When he figured out that E is just like MC squared.

The train set out but it was far too slow.
They would never get to Sweden for the Nobel show.
Had a speech in his pocket he might never give
Casey thought it was a good one but that’s relative.

Einstein told the fireman to pour on coal.
‘Cause the speed of light is our final goal.
There’s no speed more speedy and it ain’t been topped.
When they hit it Casey saw his pocket watch had stopped.

Casey Ein. Gonna finish his name later!
Casey Stein. See, you didn’t have to wait!
If you don’t malign or manipulate the dater
The consistency of time is open to debate.

Spelling Speed Of Light starts with S.O.L.
It’s an acronym for other shocking things as well.
Which we won’t discuss, ’cause we’ve got reserve.
But S.O.L. is what they felt when Casey hit that curve.

Now they say the train kept going and it’s going still.
Casey Einstein left the world without a final will.
All he had was just a fiddle and a coffee cup.
And a train that goes forever and keeps speeding up.

Casey E. he was born to be a thinker.
Casey E. had ideas you can’t resist.
Casey E. wasn’t nasty or a stinker.
Just a brilliant engineer and a brave physicist.

Who shares your birthday?

Songs

American Idols All

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The similarities between this year’s Republican primary competition and “reality” TV are striking. The candidates have appeared together almost weekly, sometimes every couple of days. They have been together so much the nerves started to fray long ago. They’ve been forced to compete with one another on specific assigned topics like jobs, taxes, government regulation, super-patriotism, and now we’ve reached the stage where a competitor is dropped after every gathering. They have petty gripes with one another and their spats and resentments make headlines. We’re down to four now.

Who will be The Survivor? The smart money is still on Mitt Romney, who is already looking ahead to the next contest with Barack Obama.

How will the next show shape up with these two contestants? We got a hint in Iowa and New Hampshire, when Romney fell into a lyrics-reciting phase at campaign stops. Just like prime time TV, whatever gimmick gets a positive reaction from the audience will be repeated. He did this a lot.

Well, you know where this is going, don’t you?
Obama sees it, and he laid down his marker this week.

Do you think Mitt Romney has already had his first private singing lesson? I say he has. He’d better start, because he has a lot of catching up to do. Stephen Colbert is on the campaign trail now, and he can sing harmony on The Star Spangled Banner.

Yes, no matter who winds up running, this year’s presidential election will end in a sing-off! It’s obvious. America loves music and even people who don’t vote are fixated on songs. The template was well established with American Idol. Sorting through political issues is boring and hard. Caring about good governance requires time and thought. But deciding who is the best singer is fun, and we can judge it totally on emotion. There is no wrong or right – it’s all about how the singer makes you feel! Style has officially demolished substance – now it’s time for a victory lap. Get ready for the Obama-Romney-Colbert sing-off! When will we get the first Karaoke-Debate? I say it will happen by August.

What song would you sing to get votes?

Songs

Hey Nelly, Nelly

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Last year on Martin Luther King Jr. Day we had a discussion about songs and performers who spoke to the cause of civil rights. I posted a video of a Mavis Staples song and some well-known names like Nina Simone, Pete Seeger, Joan Baez and Bob Dylan were mentioned.

Near the end of the string, Barbara in Robbinsdale came up with this unexpected one – Shawn Phillips, and a folk song I had never heard before – Hey Nelly, Nelly. BiR was kind enough to give us the words, also.

Hey Nelly Nelly, come to the window
Hey Nelly Nelly look at what I see
He’s riding into town on a sway back mule
Got a tall black hat and he looks like a fool
He sure is talkin’ like he’s been to school
And it’s 1853

Hey Nelly Nelly, listen what he’s sayin’
Hey Nelly Nelly, he says it’s gettin’ late
And he says them black folks should all be free
To walk around the same as you and me
He’s talkin’ ’bout a thing he calls democracy
And it’s 1858

Hey Nelly Nelly hear the band a playing
Hey Nelly Nelly, hand me down my gun
“Cause the men are cheerin’ and the boys are too
They’re all puttin’ on their coats of blue
I can’t sit around here and talk to you
“Cause it’s 1861

Hey Nelly Nelly, Come to the window
Hey Nelly Nelly, I’ve come back alive
My coat of blue is stained with red
And the man in the tall black hat is dead
We sure will remember all the things he said
In 1865

Hey Nelly Nelly, come to the window
Hey Nelly Nelly, look at what I see
I see white folks and colored walkin’ side by side
They’re walkin’ in a column that’s a century wide
It’s still a long and a hard and a bloody ride
In 1963

I was a fan of this song before it even started because half the writing credit goes to Shel Silverstein. You can see that sly, bald devil at work as the lyrics set in context the long, long process of moving towards justice. And he gets Abe Lincoln into the starring role without ever mentioning his name. Ah, the power of a hat.

There are few things less fashionable today than earnest folk songs about changing the world, and there are even fewer songs that mention historic dates in a way that would be meaningful to anybody. “Hey Nelly Nelly” manages to do both, and it would be completely unknown today if not for a handful of recordings by Judy Collins. Still, you have to admire Silverstein and co-writer Jim Friedman for giving it a try.

What song do you know that almost no one else remembers?

Songs, The Baboon Congress

Over the River

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Today’s guest post is by Clyde.

When we were raising our children, we lived in Two Harbors and my parents lived above the east end of Duluth, only about two miles from Hawk Ridge. Among the four ways we could drive to their house, our favorite was to take the Seven Bridges Road.

Here is YouTube of a song about the Seven Bridges Road:

In winter the Seven Bridges Road was plowed only part way up the hill. Thus for our traditional Thanksgiving Day drive to my parents house we would always take the Seven Bridges Road, assuming that it would ere long be closed. And a family tradition was born to sing as we passed over each of the seven bridges “Over the river and through the woods to Grandmother’s house we go.” As our children matured, one would always ask, “What’s another popular Thanksgiving song?” A question which still lacks an answer.

Why is that? Why are there not many popular songs for this second most American of holidays? Everything seems right for songs: the season, the purpose, the mood, the many items associated with the day. But no songs have arisen.

Also, serious writers of serious music, i.e. classical, often embody popular songs, i.e. un-serious songs, in their serious music. Have I missed it, or has no one used Lydia Maria Child’s “Over the River and through the Woods” in this way?

Another mystery: Her poem which provides the words to the song was called “A Boy’s Thanksgiving Day.” Why is her poem of her childhood memories called “A Boy’s Thanksgiving Day”?

Here are her words:

Over the river, and through the wood,
To Grandfather’s house we go;
The horse knows the way to carry the sleigh
through the white and drifted snow.

Over the river, and through the wood—
Oh, how the wind does blow!
It stings the toes and bites the nose
As over the ground we go.

Over the river, and through the wood,
To have a first-rate play.
Hear the bells ring, “Ting-a-ling-ding”,
Hurrah for Thanksgiving Day!

Over the river, and through the wood
Trot fast, my dapple-gray!
Spring over the ground like a hunting-hound,
For this is Thanksgiving Day.

Over the river, and through the wood—
And straight through the barnyard gate,
We seem to go extremely slow,
It is so hard to wait!

Over the river, and through the wood—
Now Grandmother’s cap I spy!
Hurrah for the fun! Is the pudding done?
Hurrah for the pumpkin pie!

Why the dearth of Thanksgiving songs?
Go ahead. Write one.

Songs, Uncategorized

In Dublin’s Fair City

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… Where girls are so pretty,
I first set my eyes on sweet Molly Malone!

So goes a famous old Irish song, done here on You Tube by The Dubliners.

I thought of this song when I read yesterday that the spread of Zebra Mussels across Lake Minnetonka appears to be steady and unstoppable. Infestation is probably inevitable, though there have been efforts to slow the advance of this invasive species by encouraging boat owners to drain, clean and dry their boats before moving from affected waters to clean ones.

Ah, well.

At least when Minnetonka’s docks and shores are completely encrusted with sharp shells, we can sing to our new overlords about their relentless advance.

I love to go boating,
A-drifting and floating,
On summertime days in the suburbs out west.
The lakes get quite rowdy.
They’re frothy and crowdy.
With Zebra Striped Mussels, Alive, Alive-O!

Alive, Alive-O! Alive, Alive-O!
They’ve got Zebra Striped Mussels, Alive, Alive-O!

On Lake Minnetonka,
They drop so much stray junk ya
can’t even see water beneath the debris.
The piles are fantastic
They’re discarded plastic
And Zebra Striped Mussels, Alive, Alive-O!

Alive, alive-O! Alive, Alive-O!
They’ve got Zebra Striped Mussels, Alive, Alive-O!

So thanks to the sportsmen,
The starboard-and-portsmen,
Who go lake-to-lake with their vessels un-drained.
They’re spreading and trading,
Wholesale propagating
Those Zebra Striped Mussels, Alive, Alive-O!

Alive, alive-O! Alive, Alive-O!
They’ve got Zebra Striped Mussels, Alive, Alive-O!

Do you pick up hitchhikers?

Poems, Songs

Welcome to Slippery Slope, Mr. AutoPresident!

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There has been some tooth gnashing over President Obama’s authorization of the signing of the Patriot Act extension with an autopen. This machine long ago took the place of the chief executive’s hand in dealing with routine correspondence, but apparently this is the first time a mechanical device has been used to turn a bill into a law.

A legal opinion written by lawyers with the Bush (2) administration was used to justify the move.

Even so, Obama will be criticized, but that’s not the greatest risk. The greatest risk, as anyone who has worked in a factory knows, is allowing a machine to get a metal and plastic toe in the door when it comes to doing an essential part of your job. History tells us where that leads – sometime in the future our President (whoever it may be) and the autopen are bound to have their John Henry Moment.

When John Henry got into the White House
Famous ‘cause he worked so hard,
He arrived with much renown, he had people all ‘round.
He was popular and held in high regard, Lord Lord.
Popular and held in high regard.

When John Henry reached the Oval Office
Surrounded by women and men
He said, “Now I’m feelin’ fine, I got papers here to sign”
They said, “All of that is done by auto pen” Lord Lord,
“We don’t need you with the auto pen.”

John Henry said to his people
“While it’s true my arms are sore,
I won’t let them wires and wheels fix my presidential seals,
Bring us bills and I will sign them all and more, Lord Lord.
Bills to sign and more and more and more.

So John Henry signed with his left hand
Autopen signed with the right
Though it didn’t have no arm or no presidential charm,
It signed every bill that he did through the night, Lord Lord
Both of them signed bills all through the night.

When they found them there in the morning,
It was dark and cold and damp.
Just a gizmo and a bloke, blood and oil and sweat and smoke.
One was broken and one died of writer’s cramp, Lord Lord.
What a way to go, from writer’s cramp.

The moral to this story
Is to do all you can do.
But there ain’t a man alive who can challenge and survive
when machines arrive to take the place of you, Lord Lord.
When machines arrive to sign then you are through!

The John Henry song sure comes in handy at a time like this. I love to re-write it – some of you may recall I’ve done it before. But why not take advantage of every opportunity while I can? Because it’s a repetitive activity, I’m sure someday there will be an app to do it for me.

What arts and crafts project could you do over and over and over without tiring of it?

Songs

Song and Dance

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It could very well turn out this Friday that the never ending struggle for control in Washington will express itself in a federal government shutdown of uncertain duration.

The key factor in any political battle like this is, of course, who gets blamed for it.

This is the same old song and dance, so naturally it made me think of an old song and dance from the Broadway musical of the mid ’60’s that starred Angela Lansbury for so many years – Mame!

Yes, it’s an extremely dated reference that would be lost on anyone under the age of 50, but here’s a special ironic bonus – the original book, play and musical had a strong depression era theme of resilience in the face of financial catastrophe!

Video of the signature song as performed by Ms. Lansbury isn’t available on You Tube, but here’s a case where a fan valiantly tried to match the official soundtrack with some jumpy images of the show.

I hope there’s enough there to remind you of Jerry Herman’s catchy tune so you can sing along with new lyrics for the 112th Congress, as all its members attempt to leave people on the other side of the aisle holding the bag.

You caused the government to shut down. Blame!
The major industry in this town. Blame!
Our Medicare’s suspended,
And Medicaid is out of money too!
There’s nothing in our pockets
except a governmental IOU.

There’s just one thing we have to assign. Blame!
It must be yours ‘cause it can’t be mine. Blame!
There’s no recourse and nothing to
do except connect this to a name.
We’re handing you the title, gents.
Making this yours is vital, gents.
You’ve taken our entitlements! Blame!

You’ve cut things far too close to the bone. Blame!
You’ve spent too much. It’s time to atone. Blame!
Our brilliant plan will fix it
Unless you thwart us like you always do.
We can’t be held responsible
‘long as we can pin this mess on you!

There’s nothing left that we can discuss. Blame!
Let’s point our fingers, sputter and cuss. Blame!
We’ve shaped a simple narrative
Making you the villain in this game.
Consider yourself battled with …
Our hearts and brains are addled with …
We’ll see that you get saddled with … Blame!

Is it ever polite to point?

Songs

Bubby Fakes a Stand

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Today’s entry comes from our perennial sophomore at Wendell Wilkie High School, the one and only Bubby Spamden.

Hey Mr. C.,

I’m wondering if we can get some labor unrest stirred up here in Minnesota just like they have it in Wisconsin. I’d really like my teachers to go AWOL for a few protest days at the state capitol.

What a great deal for those students next door – they’ve already had two days off with the promise of more to come! PLUS, after a day of playing video games in your PJ’s you can turn on the TV news to see your English teacher freezing on the steps of a state office building, waving a hand lettered sign and screaming for the Governor’s head. I’ll bet when that teacher gets back to the classroom she’ll be too hoarse to do anything but have hours and hours of quiet reading time – which is my favorite kind of in-class assignment. I love opening a big, soft book and then putting my head right down on it so the words can soak into my brain.

And speaking of going AWOL, how about those Wisconsin democrats who got to go on a road trip to Illinois? They’re hiding in a hotel somewhere, but nobody knows which one. And now Wisconsin’s State Troopers are looking for them! If I were on the lam in northern Illinois, I’d pick a hotel with a water park and hot waffle machines in the breakfast bar. I had no idea being a member of the state legislature was so cool! I thought it was just boring meetings all day long – kind of like going to class, but with voting.

What a great learning experience. I demand equal treatment with the students in Wisconsin! Please, make it happen here!

In our Life Choices class on Friday, I told Mr. Boozenporn that I would have really, really respected him more if he had gone to Wisconsin to show solidarity with the public employees there. It looked like he was actually considering it for a moment, but then he switched the lesson plan and spent the whole hour talking about labor history and he made us watch videos of Pete Seeger! And he says he’ll bring in his Weavers records on Tuesday!

Not what I had in mind.

Your friend,
Bubby

I told Bubby I was impressed that he was following the news so closely, but distressed to discover that he only sees these monumental policy struggles as another possible way to skip a few days of school. I like Mr. Boozenporn’s approach. Subjecting helpless high school students to skinny banjo players doing pro-union songs is more subversive and possibly more effective than marching on the capitol.

I have it on good authority that these are two of the You Tube videos Mr. Boozenporn showed yesterday.

What’s your favorite song about work?

Songs

A Spot of Sun

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I haven’t heard any complaints about warmer temperatures over the past week, as the sun shows its power and begins to melt our winter’s snow (to make room for our spring snow).

Now comes word that the sun is also spitting out increased amounts of charged electromagnetic particles (a Coronal Mass Ejection) in keeping with a predicted rise in turbulent solar weather that is expected to peak in 2012.

Over time, this could cause some disruption in our systems. Communications failures are possible. Navigation might be affected. There may even be power outages.

Great. Now we have to think about solar weather on top of our existing obsession over the more immediate and understandable local weather. Eventually there will be songs.

Oh the weather up there is spotty
Yeah, the Sun is one hot toddy.
And your eyes will melt if you stare.
Let it flare, let it flare, let it flare!

Oh the scientists are detecting
some Coronal Mass Ejecting.
Let’s put on our lead-lined underwear,
Let it flare, let it flare, let it flare!

When it finally settles down
2013 or 14 or so,
If enough of us are around,
we can re-fixate on snow!

Oh it doesn’t show signs of slowing.
Should the northern sky be glowing?
With charged particles in our hair!
Let it flare, let it flare, let it flare!

This is just a start, of course. Can you picture Gene Kelley dancing to “Singing in the Flame”?

And for those who enjoy a good informational science song, they don’t get any better than this one from They Might Be Giants.

The sun is our friend. A really, really volatile and intense friend who will burn you if you’re not careful.

How do you manage your exposure to the sun?

Songs

Hum For Your Health

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Some recent studies have indicated humming could be a technique to combat chronic sinusitis.

What’s the connection? Researchers found that humming apparently increases the flow of air in the sinuses. This was deduced in one study by measuring the amount of nitric oxide in air exhaled by people who had been humming. Nitric oxide is produced in the sinus cavities (who knew?) and a sharp increase in the amount coming out of those hummer noses led to the conclusion that the sinuses were getting extra ventilation when subjects engaged in some closed-lip karaoke.

What the studies DIDN’T report – the nature of the tunes being hummed. Can you force enough air into your sinuses with classical, or would the blues do a more effective job? How about heavy metal? Can you hum that?

Personally, I would go for the ventilating power of a big Broadway number like the title tune from Oklahoma. Although you’d only be humming it, you could imagine these rhino-centric words as a form of self-medicating parody.

Aunt Eller:
There’s pressure in the cavities behind my nose.

Andrew:
My face is achin’. I cain’t get a grip.

Laurey:
Might be comin’ down with somethin’, I suppose.

Curley:
Probably a case of that postnasal drip.

Company:
Nasal drip!
Nasal drip! Gonna be a trip!
Gonna give you headaches. Headaches and secretions.
Just like Alexander
Gave to them Phoenicians.
Feelin’ like your skull is in a workbench vise,
Plenty of pressure. Ain’t so nice.
Plenty of coughing. I feels hot.
Plenty of pain and plenty of snot.

Sinusitis! Inflammation. Constant pressure. Pain!
Where the mucus flows out of my nose
And it soaks the ground like April rain!
Sinusitis! Decongestants? Go ahead and try!
Cause ya cain’t replace yer throbbin’ face.
It’s enough to make ya wanna cry.

We know this is all in our head
And it makes us all wish we wuz dead.
And when we say
Yeeow! Ayipioeeay!
We’re only sayin’
Leave me alone Sinusitius!
Sinusitis, go ‘way!

Do you like to sing or hum to yourself? Out loud?