Today’s post comes from idea man and marketing expert Spin Williams, who is constantly trying to stay ahead of the future at The Meeting That Never Ends.
I’m excited, because giving management advice is always a money maker! That’s why we love, love, love this New York Times article about unhappiness on the job.
It has started a new conversation that’s going to make it possible for us to charge clients some hefty fees! And the basic premise is SO TRUE – everybody is depressed about the way things are going at work.
That’s right – everybody! That’s why I believe we’ve reached an economic and employment tipping point. Everything in the workplace is about to go topsy-turvy, which sounds like a great calamity but it’s actually a wonderful money maker for us if we can spin it right and get enough CEO’s into panic mode!
A couple of years ago in the Bad Old Days when there was no money, I was one of those managers who thought the disgruntled employee set was a bunch of selfish crybabies. Setting up daycare centers, fitness clubs and free transportation for the workforce made no sense to me. “Employee Coddling” is what I called it – a misguided HR strategy that I thought would totally undermine the bottom-line focus of successful corporations.
After all, the business model we inherited from the 19th century is built on exploitation of labor. Every mogul has been taught to consider the workforce with this thought in mind: “If they’re not miserable, we could be making more money!”
But now we know businesses that help employees feel valued and successful are the ones that prosper most. It seems employee coddling can be good for the bottom line! In fact, this particular quote in the New York Times story really hit home:
A truly human-centered organization puts its people first — even above customers — because it recognizes that they are the key to creating long-term value.
Of course! Everything you thought is now the opposite. The employee is now the customer, and a modern workplace should sell their employees the feeling of being valued. Here’s where the math comes in – we’ll create a package of automatically deductible employee fees.
- Workers can buy a thoughtful boss upgrade.
- They will be charged a sane workload assessment.
- And their pay will be docked for the meaningful work surcharge.
And the best part is – if we can get back half their wages through these fees, your business is suddenly breaking even!
This is a genius idea because Americans are so moved to do work that improves the lives of others. So in the future, we advise smart companies to hire people to play the role of grateful customers to help employees feel even better about their jobs!
Yes, I’m promoting the idea that employees will become the firm’s actual customers, and their current customers will become their employees. In a weird way, it all makes perfect sense, and it’s inevitable!
You probably need our management advice to deal with it. Don’t say I didn’t warn you!
Future Ahead, Over and Out,
Spin Williams
What is it worth to feel happy in your work?