Today’s post comes from formerly reputable journalist Bud Buck, now mired in entertainment and personality news.

Fans of The Sun are aghast at what she has been doing in recent weeks – and NOT doing.

“I’m worried about her,” The Moon told me recently. “This was supposed to be her year to cut loose but lately she’s been really boring and that’s just not like her.”

In fact, observers had predicted that 2013 would bring one flashy outburst after another from the celestial orb, always a daily favorite for those who can’t get enough of watching the stars. The Sun’s behavior has been tracked so extensively that patterns have started to emerge clearly showing a boom/bust cycle of outrageous activity followed by relative calm. The Sun had been on an upswing as recently as last Fall when a widely publicized incident caused considerable chatter.

“For no apparent reason she expelled at least two plumes of superheated gas in a really random, almost casual way,” said a passing asteroid. “We were appalled. You can’t eject stuff like that in a crowded solar system and expect that no one will notice.”

While there were no injuries in the November incident, it was reported as a precursor of outbursts to come. But lately The Sun has settled into a low-activity phase that has some observers predicting we are in for an extended lull. Some have even wondered if the recent “coolness” of The Sun might foretell a chilling effect that could counteract Global Warming.

Others discount that theory.

“Of course The Sun is hot,” explained Venus, also smoldering. “But everyone overestimates how important she is. Global warming on Earth is caused by a build-up of man made pollutants – the Sun has very little to do with it. She only wishes every little expulsion of hers would get noticed.”

But the consensus seems to be that the new quiet spell is only another moment in a changeable series of phases for The Sun.

“I wouldn’t call it ‘settling down’,” said Curiosity’s Mars Rover, which recently had to go into a form of mechanical hibernation to wait through an increasingly rare Solar Outburst. “She’s always going to be The Sun, so there’s unlimited potential there for explosive, really fiery displays. But I watch her all day, every day, and aside from the occasional tantrum that spews a bit of electrically charged hydrogen and helium, she’s been pretty quiet.”

Others worry that this is just a pre-storm lull.

“I wouldn’t put it past The Sun to be holding back – saving up material over time for an upcoming night of extreme craziness,” said another experienced star watcher, the Hubble Space Telescope. “Understanding,” he added, “that when you’re the sun, it’s never really night.”

Describe your behavior in its wildest, most unpredictable phase.