Uncategorized

Hello Hurricane!

57 Comments
Your Weird Uncle, Hurricane Earl

I hope the newest storm manages to pass along our most populated coast without hurting anyone or destroying property, because I would like to have only fond memories of a hurricane with the quintessential hick name – Earl. I’d like to think of this as a Labor Day weekend we were forced to spend in the company of an eccentric, unpredictable but ultimately harmless goofball uncle. How can we make that happen? Alas, imagination is the only useful tool we have against the weather, and you know I have a fondness for dopey heroic poetry, so here goes …

With his one clear eye and his wavy hair
He’s a big tough muscular column of air.
You can see him for miles. He makes flags unfurl.
And the people all call him Hurricane Earl.

Earl was a youngster when he made the map.
He can blow down trees and make light poles snap.
He can shake up houses. He can break some plates.
He can cause consternation in the Eastern States.

Down in North Carolina and way up to Maine.
Folks whisper of his power and his country name.
When he sweeps on by he’ll make the ocean whirl
You’ll get soaked, Manhattan. Courtesy of Earl.

If there’s one thing you’d better not do for fun,
Don’t spit in the face of this son-of-a-gun.
He packs quite a punch. He’s not shy at all.
He’ll blow it right back at you like a cannonball.

He’s a plywood king. He sells water too.
He’ll board up your home and your business too.
Look down from space to see his jaunty swirl.
Underneath is the havoc of Hurricane Earl.

If you’re on Long Island better go inside.
If you’re on Cape Cod, find a place to hide.
Down in Washington, take a few steps back.
There’s a surge a comin’, and it’s not Iraq.

He’s a pile of wind blowing in from sea.
He’s a massive concentration of energy.
He’s the ocean’s spawn. Singular, not plural.
He’s a hurricane by the name of Earl.

The hurricane names for the next few years have already been chosen, so if you’re not on this list,your only hope of seeing your name on a chunk of extravagant weather is to attach it to something else. I think a government strapped for cash should consider selling naming rights for all the significant weather events.

57 thoughts on “Hello Hurricane!”

  1. E- names are tough. We know an adorable and precocious baby with the name of Everett. I worried about that when I first heard it, but he wears it well.

    Afraid neither the s&h nor I am on the list for hurricanes, so I chose a cold snap, because I am afraid Atmospheric Inversion Catherine won’t fit in most boxes.

    I think I did have great-uncle Earl, but my family doesn’t do whacky-we are, after all, German Lutherans. Whacky is way too close to irresponsible.

    Ditto for eccentric.

    Like

    Reply

    1. Oh, this made me laugh. Our family has also steered clear of whacky and eccentric (though we do manage some of the latter) – but more because it would draw attention, and that would be prideful, which is the ultimate sin in the eyes of my Norwegian Lutheran family.

      Like

      Reply

  2. Dale, you’re amazing – more awesome than any weather event. thanks!
    interesting, because my brother and his wife (from Baton Rouge) are here and we were talking about hurricanes yesterday as we de-stemmed about 20 pounds of grapes for grape jelly. he and his wife came to visit us in MN just after they survived Andrew in 1992. they talk about events and date them around hurricane names, much the same as we date by snowstorms, ice storms, etc. i’d much rather do snow storms and they hate the cold up here.
    for future reference: looks like one gets about a scant cup of juice per pound of grapes. and goats LOVE them stems after the grapes are removed.

    Like

    Reply

      1. thanks, Jacque and MIG – after we de-stemmed, i had a full 3-gallon stock pot of grapes. these are Valiants – pretty seedy and tough skins but make delish jelly/jam. because i had lots of things going on, i put the stock pot in the oven and just baked the grapes at 300 degrees for about 4 hours. then i dumped the whole mess (and let me tell you, there are stains everywhere) into a cotton dish towel and let it drain until this morning (taking juice off and adding it to a fridged gallon jar all along). this morning we ended up with about 18 cups of heavy, thick juice. i’ll let it sit for a day (to let the tartaric acid precipitate out) and then i just do the low-sugar Sure Jell thing, hot water bath, etc. i usually add a few apples when i am cooking the grapes but i didn’t have room this time. last year i had some black currants so i added those. but this year was a bumper crop. now to look for jars and lids…..

        Like

        Reply

      2. This sounds pretty low maintenance, so we may be giving it a try this weekend-if I can stand the idea of the oven being on-I think I now remember why I used the crock pot.

        I’m thinking maybe grape stems would make a nice packing material for a jar of chocolate sauce-we’ll see how big a mess that looks like.

        Like

        Reply

      3. I simmer mine on the stove top with just a little water, then put the grapes through an old-fashioned colander with a wooden pestel. Very fast. I did wild grapes this year and the jelly is wonderful.

        Like

        Reply

    2. So how do you make your jelly, barb? My grapes are ready to go too. Last year, I cooked mine down in the crockpot into a sort of grape butter, that while a good thing, was not what I was going for.

      I’d love to send Dream and the gang our stems, but don’t think they would transport well.

      Like

      Reply

  3. Rise and Shine Babooners:

    My favorite kind of storm is not listed: Blizzard. So I’ll have to vote for something I don’t want (much like a real political election I guess). Blizzards are attractive to me because they can close everything up tight without inflicting any real damage. Yet you’d best understand they can be fearsome.

    Meanwhile we are off to Lake Superior for several days. I will check in from there. I am anticipating the cool weather. The heat/humidity thing melts me.

    Like

    Reply

      1. jacque i am with you i chose the tornado because a cold snap just won’t do it for me. blizzard is what i was looking for. i am heading to winnepeg tomorrow for a football ditty with the baseball sons football team. forecast high 60!!! we will give that a try for a football game. i’ll bet the boys are thankful

        Like

        Reply

    2. Jacque: are you veterans of northern Bayfield County, or is this trip a first? Don’t answer me. I just want to be sure you know about the remarkable Big Top Chautauqua up that old mountain south of Bayfield. The show tomorrow night should be excellent. If you are still there on the 10th, “Riding the Wind” is running. I’ve seen that show maybe eight times and cannot wait for #9. But I bet you know all about the tent show, Maggies and the other joys of Bayfield. Have a wonderful time.

      Like

      Reply

      1. We are vets of the area. I first travelled here in 1989. I like to get here at least every other year. We are headed to the Chataqua tomorrow night. It is cool here. Rain is predicted tomorrow–drat.

        Like

        Reply

  4. I’m not on the naming list, but I really didn’t think I would be. My dad is on it twice (Bill and William – he goes by both) and my older brother is on it as well. It’s strange how they repeat the names every six years. There are enough names in the world to use new ones every year. Oh well, maybe they just don’t want to work that hard.

    As for the poll, I chose a good ole thunderstorm. I love storms, especially when I can sit up and watch them. Last night, I woke up at 2 am to rain just pouring down. I had to get up and close all the windows. I don’t enjoy it when the storm wakes me up, haha. I’d rather go to sleep listening to it. I always look forward to the relief the storm brings from the oppressive heat, as well. This weekend looks beautiful – mid 60’s and sun 🙂 Perfect for Labor Day weekend.

    Like

    Reply

    1. It seems unfair that there should be BOTH Bill and William, and no Alanna.

      If I remember correctly, once a really severe storm occurs, the name goes into retirement and a new one has go get in the rotation.

      I can’t help but feel this is encouraging storms to bad behavior, but I can’t explain why. I think it might be a sort of Lutheranism meets Hinduism problem. I’ll drink more coffee now, I am not making sense.

      Like

      Reply

  5. Greetings! I chose thunderstorm because I love the drama, thunder and lightning surrounding a good storm. Plus, you usually have cooler, less humid weather after one. Although that has not always been the case this summer, it seems.

    On that list of names, I saw Josephine — my “almost” name. Story goes that I was supposed to be named after my grandfather, Joseph — but they went with Joanne instead. Whenever we visited, my stoic German grandfather would call me “Yohanna” once he figured out who I was of his dozens of grandchildren.

    On that same web page further down on right is the list of retired names. The name “Joan” was retired in 1988. Guess I won’t be hearing my name attached to significant weather anytime soon. Sigh …

    Like

    Reply

  6. Good Morning to All

    I choose to be the name of a squall, a storm of short duration that is very windy. I think that is the best fit for me. All of those other weather events are more destructive than I hope would fit for me, but I will have to admit that I might get too hot or too cold at times or become inverted. I hope one of those heavy duty storms, like a tornado, is not the kind of storm that fits with my name. Some you, who are more dramatic than I am, might prefer to be the name of one of those more spectacular types of weather.

    I have a friend named Earl who is, in some ways, an unusual rural type of person, but not really a hick. I think there was a famous basketball player known as Earl the Pearl. Then there is the old rock song with the line ” they sometimes call me Speedo, but my real name is Mr. Earl”.

    Like

    Reply

    2. I think the most hick-ish boy names in this part of the world are Duwayne and Leroy. The two cops in Lake Woebgone have for decades been Gary and Leroy, I think, but Gary just isn’t a farmer name.

      Incidentally, anyone who is a Garrison Keillor fan should know there is a 90-minute “American Masters” show on him tonight on TPT. It’s good.

      Another Earl song: the Dixie Chicks’s song “Goodbye Earl.”

      Like

      Reply

  7. Thunderstorm Steve reporting in here. I want to be a weather event that waters peoples’ gardens, not a notorious storm that kills people and makes a mess of the natural world. Easy call, that one.

    My cabin has a screened gazebo closer to the lake than the cabin itself. I often slept out there in a sleeping bag (for warmth on a cold Lake Superior July night!) and hammock, swinging in the air while the big lake sloshed and gurgled around our rocky shore.

    One night my daughter and I were treated to a light show from lightning bugs dancing in lazy patterns around the gazebo, flashing lurid messages to each other with glowing butts. Then they got tired and pooped out, flickering lazily.

    Then a thunderstorm rolled in from the West, first striking along the Minnesota shoreline (which we can barely see from our place). Lightning flashed erratically up and down the North Shore, followed by that lovely thumping and sputtering sound of distant thunder. I’ve always thought distant thunderstorms look and sound like Civil War cannon battles, but I’ve never seen or heard that, so what do I know?

    Suddenly our fireflies woke up to the fact that the night wasn’t over. When they saw the shuddering light from Minnesota they couldn’t help themselves: they had to get out and dance again, once more flashing invitations to each other. It looks so poetic, the displays of fireflies, but I am pretty sure they are just saying, “Hey baby, come on over here! Mine is bigger than his!” Men! They are the same everywhere.

    Then the racing storm lashed into the South Shore. We could hear it coming a mile away, a wall of wind that rushed toward us in the dark like a large animal. And when it hit, the wind set the trees thrashing like buggy whips, and suddenly we could barely hear anything else. Rain wasn’t far behind, and all over our world the wind-driven rain soaked thirsty trees.

    It only seemed violent. The storm was nothing to fear, just an especially dramatic summer storm that pruned the forest of weak trees while feeding the healthy ones with pure, bright water. Molly and I swung in our little hammocks, safe and dry in the night air, while the sweet chaos of the storm swept over us and moved off to the east toward Madeline Island and the lesser Apostles with its life-giving rain.

    Like

    Reply

  8. Wow! There is a Sally potential hurricane lurking out there. They never used to get that far in the alphabet, but with global warming I might get my name attached some year in the future. My given name is Sarah, but I’ve always been called Sally – an old fashioned nick name for Sarah and what my wonderful great aunt was called. If Sally ever is retired and replaced by Sarah I could have a second shot at a storm. Hope the oceans cool down though and we don’t continue to go into the second alphabets.

    Like

    Reply

  9. I’d be good with a cold snap – an excuse to hunker down with a mug of hot cocoa, a good book, a dog curled up next to you, maybe a fire in the fireplace. Plus, I love how the snow sparkles in the crisp, bright winter sun. Admittedly by February I’m usually quite done with winter, but up until then, I’m a fan.

    And I guess I missed my storm last year – Ana (one “n”) was on the list for 2009. Guess she came and went without much mention. My Norwegian Lutheran ancestors would be so pleased (but not proud – that might be a sin).

    Like

    Reply

  10. I chose thunderstorm since blizzard wasn’t on the list. Ice storm and range fire could also be possibilities for naming, but they are nasty and destructive and I wouldn’t want my name associated with them. We have had so many more ice storms around here with resulting power outages that we are having a cast iron gas stove installed in the family room. It is turned on with a with a remote starter just like a TV remote so it can be turned on even when the power is out. Lucky Jacque going to Bayfield! I am staying home, and my husband is traveling to Pine Ridge this weekend with two Indian friends (Arikara and Hidatsta) to play gospel, blues, and rock and roll at a local church. My husband plays keyboards and harmonica. Our friends are quite evangelical and fervent members of the Church of God but are willing to put up with a repressed Lutheran as long as he can wail on the harmonica.

    Like

    Reply

  11. Morning–
    I didn’t make the list either, so I voted Thunderstorm, they are fun, noisy, flashy events…
    Although, as Jim said above, squall is probably more fitting for me if I get mad; ‘flash’ and it’s over–
    Lunch today with my wife and mother-in-law. Should be a very pleasant ‘warming event’ with no dramatics…
    In regard to yesterdays snake issue, I did tell my wife about it; mostly because I wanted to show her the shed skin. Daughter thought the skin was gross and my wife was only sort of tolerant of it… the fact that she didn’t actually comment on its’ proximity to the house should not lead you to think she isn’t already imagining snakes in the basement. WE are the ‘indoor’ people, any other vermin, animal or critter had better be ‘outdoor’ if they know what’s good for them. Period End of Discussion.

    Enjoy the day!

    Like

    Reply

  12. I voted Atmospheric Inversion because I like mysteries and I’m not even sure what it is. And neither Abby nor Barbara show up on the lists… boy, there are so many retired names, and I’m glad not to have my name there: “This is done when a hurricane cause so much death and destruction that reuse of the same name would be insensitive to the people who suffered losses. ” Uffda.

    Mario (visiting step-son) and the girls tented out night before last, woke up for the storm and had “a little party” out there. He does it well so they won’t be afraid — makes it very exciting…

    NOW we get the beautiful weather sans humidity, after my out-of-towners are gone. Have a glorious day, Babooners.

    Like

    Reply

  13. inversions always bring up the same picture for me. i was in livingston montana around the christmas holidays and it was colder than the dickens. i was alone but with many friends form previous visits in the local area. the temp hit 20 below and the car i had flooded because the fuel injectors didn’t wor properly at that temp. i had to take out the spark plugs and do a bunch of stuff to get the car running and i guess others wondered what is was so hell bent on getting out on a -20 day. the car finally started aand i headedout to the ski hill about 12;00 and when i got there i had the whole place to myself. the beauty of the story is that there was an inversion at the mountain and it was 35 degrees up just a thousand feet or so, all the skiing i wanted to do was up in the banana belt. had a great afternoon and was sweating like a pig from dressing for the tundra when actially it was more like omaha with big hills.
    the thunderstorm went unnoticed and taken for granted in my life until my sister moved back from 5 years in napa. she missed the thunderstorms dearly and pointed out how special they are. i had always gone out and encouraged my kids to go out and play in the rain if it was tolerably warm. nothing better in the world than taking a shower in the yard with warm water or cooling water on a hot day.
    see ya all later babooners

    Like

    Reply

    1. Tim: good story about skiing in freaky good weather.

      My daughter Molly lives in Portland, where rain is a chronic soggy fact of life in winter but she never, ever gets to experience a thumping thunderstorm that makes houses shake and clears the air.

      Good for you, encouraging kids to play in the rain.

      Like

      Reply

      2. I am said to live in the Banana belt of North Dakota since it is usually 20 degrees warmer here in the winter than in other parts of the state.

        Like

        Reply

    1. Found out something interesting about mosquitos during last night’s soccer game. There was this cloud of dragonflies zipping around well overhead on the hilltop I was watching from. I was informed that they were feasting on mosquitos! True enough we all sat comfortably under the dragonfly canopy.

      Like

      Reply

      1. Thanks for explaining this, MIG. We had them – I described them as a Herd of Dragonflies at dusk last week. I thought (hoped) maybe that’s what they were doing. Will invite them back!

        Off topic (still) – I filled my birdfeeders early, a couple of days ago, so the little girls could hopefully see them. I see the cardinals there, but I’m not hearing them at dawn anymore, just mostly the bluejays. 😐 Anyone know if the cardinals are just being “seasonally” quiet, or why else I’m not hearing them?

        Like

        Reply

      2. Barbara: cardinal singing is associated with mating and territorial claims. That’s behind them now.

        It is easy to mess with their heads in mating season by doing even a crummy copy of their song (which I hear as “What Cheer? What Cheer?” followed by a sort of British twit string of “what what what what?”). Take a stab at whistling that call and you will be surrounded by angry red birds. They are so cute when they’re mad.

        Like

        Reply

    2. Yes, dragonflies are well-known mosquito-control machines. We’ve had lots of them this year, as well as many species of butterflies. In June there were red admirals all over the place. They were on roads and trees and buildings.

      Hummingbirds are migrating right now. I’ve had three hummingbirds fighting over prime positions at my hummingbird feeder. They are wonderful to watch. Monarchs are migrating too.

      Like

      Reply

      1. MIG- thanks for the dragonfly info… herds of them around here too and swarms (?) of barn swallows too… never thought they were after mosquitoes but it does make sense now that you mention it…
        We love the barn swallows… first time I see one in the fields in the spring I call my wife to let her know and we have a little cheer. It’s interesting; I’ll see just one scoping out the place and two days later there will be swallows all over the place.. Love it!

        Like

        Reply

  15. Hey, a Google search reveals a Hurricane Connie in 1955 – Cat 4 storm but it weakened before landfall, so it mostly dumped a bunch of rain on the East Coast.
    I also love a good storm, the beauty and power, and the clean earth feeling later. Some great writing today, ‘Booners, thanks for the entertainment!

    Like

    Reply

Leave a reply to Ben Cancel reply