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Buried Treasure

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Here’s a note from Tamara Kant-Waite, past president pro-tem of the Future Historians of America:

Dear Prospective Primary Sources,

The last time I wrote it was to encourage you to treat everything you touch as if it could be a valuable future artifact – something to be cherished and studied and puzzled over by the scholars of nexter-year. I’m back to make the point again because the future of our representation of the past is at stake! Our precious objects have lives that run parallel to our own, but many of those smaller metallic trinkets will last a lot longer than we do.

That belt buckle you’re wearing, for example. To you it may be a mere link in the ensemble that holds up your pants, but to Future Historians that hunk of metal could represent a tremendous breakthrough. A buckle that’s not at all like it was just found buried in Alaska and is being touted as proof that people migrated across a land bridge that linked present North America with Siberia! Imagine! Who knows what YOUR belt buckle, found 1,500 years from now, could prove? It might become the only piece of evidence that ancient upper Midwestern peoples who traded in the industrial/retail area near the Woman Throwing Hat Statue migrated, perhaps on a daily basis, out to the suburbs.

It’s hard to tell what parts of our built up and manufactured world will last, but real things tell stories. So spend some time today paying attention to the genuine objects that surround you. And then take some of these precious items out in your yard, and bury them.

Why? Because they will be received as gifts by Future Historians who may otherwise be condemned to sorting through our permanent e-mails, perpetual Facebook pages and indelible tweets. That’s bound to be dreary work. Which is why these yet-to-be-born historical investigators will silently thank you for your blessed offering of something tangible to examine.

Yours in the Fullness of Time,

Tamara

She has a point, but it’s hard to guess which of my most durable things might make a worthy discovery for the scholars of tomorrow. It would likely be the most mundane thing I have, which does not narrow the field much since everything I have is mundane.
A nail clipper, perhaps?

What will the archeologists find most interesting when they sift through the site of your house 1,500 years from now?

56 thoughts on “Buried Treasure”

  1. Rise and Shine Baboons!

    I have often thought that archeologists will be so puzzled by all the little, durable plastic bags full of dog poop in my garbage cans. Can you imagine the questions?

    Why were they preserving dog poop?
    What did they do with it?
    Was it supremely valued given all of the plastic bags of it we found?

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    3. Clearly it is a highly valued ritual object as so many households had these objects, though not all. Was it more prized, however, than the box of un-bagged feline poop found in basements and other tucked away places in homes across the country? Only future historians will be able to determine that…

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  2. Good morning to all,

    We have two 6 inch tall ceramic pigs sitting side by side smiling at each other and holding books that sit on a shelf in our kitchen. Maybe future historians would find these to be interesting. Could they figure out something about our culture if they found these items? Probably it would be a signal to them that we are rather strange people. I guess they would be right about that.

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  3. Morning all. I’m sure future historians will spend way too much time trying to figure out the large collection of paper punches that I have in my studio. They are all pretty heavy, made from metal. Besides the typical circles and squares, I have frilly border punches, snowflakes, flowers, birds and spider webs.

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    1. VS, would future historians have any change of figuring out that your objects are paper punches? Paper may fall out of use in the future. The idea that anyone would punch shapes out of paper might be hard for them to understand if they aren’t familiar with the uses of paper. Due to the large number of punches that you have, you would probably be seen as one of the leaders of some group that used these objects that they can’t explain.

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  4. Someday an archeologist will unearth a bin full of cloth dolls with different skin tones, brightly colored hair and clothing in wild patterns. Clearly totems of some sort, perhaps one for each day of the month, plus one in the traditional green and red of the ancient Christmas holiday. Extra clothes, doll-sized school desks, a bed, tents, animal “familiars” and other additional items made of the same brightly colored cloth clearly indicate some sort of Cult of the Groovy (a name partially still visible on a small tag attached to one of the dolls) that involved re-enacting portions of a child’s day. All of the dolls are smiling, so clearly the Cult of the Groovy is about happiness…but to what end? Why?…

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    2. my daughter played with the barbies in the tub and did little plays with them but evidentally part of writing dialog oddities was the ritual of chewing on their hands so when these barbies are found they will all have bathtub hair no clothes and hands that are chewed to a pulp. what an odd people these are. they are different form the others on the planet we have discovered earlier…

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  5. They will think we were a cult of Santa Clause worshipers where many people met to eat off all those sets of dishes and to bow down to the over 100 stout, bearded, red-dressed Baals.
    They will perhaps pre-date our actual time, being misled by the age of the furniture.

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    1. No doubt they will note, in contrast with my neighbors, the peculiar absence of signs of pets.
      What will they make of cans of unopened Caffeine-Free Diet Coke cans appearing in odd places all throughout the rubble.

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    2. Having been to your home, Clyde, I can confirm that you do have a very large number Santas and I think most of them are ones you carved and painted yourself. They are very nicely done. I do wonder why they are found so many places in your house. Are you one of Santa’s workers displaced from the North Pole to Minnesota?

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  6. OT I have a gift for my beloved baboon tribe. Typing at this time of day is not comfortable, so I’ll do this gift instead. Like most good gifts, it features chocolate. Katherine Hepburn’s recipe for brownies is perfect in every way.

    Kate’s Famous Brownies

    Ingredients:
    2 squares (1 ounce each) unsweetened chocolate
    1/4 pound butter
    1 cup granulated sugar
    2 eggs
    1/2 teaspoon vanilla
    1 cup chopped walnuts
    1/4 cup all-purpose flour
    1/4 teaspoon salt

    Directions:
    1. Preheat the oven to 325 degrees F.

    2. Melt unsweetened chocolate and butter over very low heat in a heavy saucepan.

    3. Remove from heat and stir in sugar.

    4. Beat in eggs and vanilla.

    5. Quickly stir in walnuts, flour and salt.

    6. Spread the batter in a well-greased 8 x 8-inch baking pan. Bake for 45 to 50 minutes. Remove the pan to a rack to cool.

    Yield: 12 brownies

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  7. Greetings! I have often thought of this very question. Future historians will undoubtedly marvel at the rubble of our house. All manner of cables and cords that don’t connect anything. At least 4 complete computers and several other individual monitors, mice, keyboards, dead hard drives, etc. 3 telescopes that aren’t used — including one very nice, rather expensive one. A complete drum set, 2 acoustic guitars, 1 electric guitar, 1 bass guitar, a keyboard and a flute. And of course, at least 3 different kinds of exercise equipment — barely used. All manner of semi-fake martial arts weapons.

    One could surmise that we were a musical family of scientists — like the von Trapps — yeah, that’s the ticket! And they would be so wrong. Only Ben plays all those instruments. What else could you assume from this assortment of stuff?

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  8. I think they will be puzzled by Dala horses, Dala Chickens, Dala Pigs, and the 5 tomtens with pointy hats and luxurious beards. They may also wonder about the multitude of nail clippers that are in every nook and cranny of the rubble; did they hide them from themselves? why are they in such odd, inaccessible places making them hard to find? why so many in home with only three people?

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    1. Renee, I once read that the most desirable list in the world is that of who has purchased nose hair trimmers via mail order. The explanation is that a person who is embarrassed by nose hair and buys something to trim it anonymously is a perfect customer for mail order houses selling anything. Such a person is vulnerable to many kinds of sales pitches.

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    2. Renee – my dad could not keep track of nail clippers for anything. To this day I’m sure that he would pocket them and then lose them in the real world. One Christmas I bought a cardboard pencil box (like we all used to have as kids) and then bought 25 nail clippers and 25 ball point pens and filled up the box. It gave my dad a good laugh and the added benefit of a couple of years before he ran out of nail clippers again!

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  10. good morning All – in between trips to the buck (Mr. T is mighty happy these days) i’ll add some items. in my Mom’s house every single lamp shade was stuck full of little dress pins – not the pretty ones with colorful heads – just little pins. stuck everywhere on lamp shades and very often in the arms of any stuffed chair or couch as well. also – shards of toothpicks everywhere. she liked to chew on them and then spit the pieces out (she, of course, denied this vehemently).

    good travels to the sick kitty (Krista’s or Crow Girl’s??) – our Julius went thru that two years ago. the decision to put him down came easily – he was miserable and so were we, watching him. wishing sick kitty and all kitties (even the nutty ones) peace.

    better get out there.
    happy day to you All.

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    1. Barb, I sympathize with your thinking in the second paragraph, but with a bit of uneasiness. I’m really glad I don’t have an “owner” like a pet does. Any owner watching me struggling up and down stairs these days would surely think, “Poor old thing! Looks like it is time to put him out of his misery.” 🙂

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      2. I hope you’re doing okay, Steve. It’s good to hear from you when you’re able to type. Please don’t hesitate to ask for help.

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      3. “Don’t hesitate to call for help?” Gee, that is tempting. I have a bag of trash that needs to go to the garbage cans, plus two screen windows need to be replaced with storms. Would you want to drive up from Waterville to tend to that? 🙂 Your reward would be free room and board here, although you’d be aghast at what I’m eating these days!

        I am tempted to try to have some kind of party when my daughter and grandson will be here. There are so many of you she would enjoy meeting.

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      6. Seriously, Steve. I would come and help if you need it – or if you need any meals to get you by. I suspect you are a much better cook than I am, though.

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      7. Accch! Me and my big mouth. I was just kidding, Krista, but Sherrilee made me such a sincere offer that I’ve decided to take her up on it . . . not because I could never get the storms up but because if she comes over we can have a party. As for my cooking, I’ve solved a lot of problems by discontinuing the bad habit of eating. My evening meal tonight will be one Honeycrisp apple. Washing up afterward will be SO easy!

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      8. Steve – i’ve often said i hope that, when i’m miserable as Julius was, that someone would be so kind to help me out. we need kind, watchful crows.
        one winter day, long ago, i was watching one remaining Red Poll sitting on a feeder – all puffed out and looking weary. all the other Red Polls had left for the north that late winter/early spring. this one, obviously, was not flying anywhere soon. it wasn’t eating. it was just sitting. in less than a minute, a crow flew in to the nearby tree. and in less than a few seconds, the crow flew over and picked the Red Poll off the feeder and flew away with him. i remarked then that i thought humans needed a kind crow at times.
        this is not to say YOU need a crow, Steve. i think the crow would know that you are alive and kicking (if not literally, then at least mentally) and enjoying your life. a kind crow would know that sort of thing.

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      9. I’m not sure I understand the story you tell, Barb, but you make me afraid of sitting around “puffed out and weary” or a big black bird will swoop in to carry me off. Yikes! That’s another good reason to have Sherrilee over!

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      10. the story means that the crow was merciful – that Red Poll was going to sit on that feeder (puffed out means sick or cold and it wasn’t that cold) – and i often wonder why humans (like my Mother, for instance) have to suffer so long in no state of health or mind when often in nature there is a merciful crow (or coyote or ….) to help shorten that suffering.

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  11. Considering how in this age every act of communication is kept in at least one from, we will exist, if it at all, far more in the historical record, specifically the digital record. So imagine 1500 years hence an electronic archeologist finds the Trail Baboon in a digital midden. What will he make of us? What will or should he learn about the larger culture?

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    1. I’m pretty sure he won’t be able to understand the Baboons at all…thus declaring us totally crazy – or else he will think we are absolutely brilliant, and kind to boot. There can be a fine line between insanity and brilliance.

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  12. If there is anyone left 1500 years into the future I hope they will have solved many of the problems that we have today. Assuming that at that time in the future things are in better shape, they would probably look on Babooners as an interesting segment of a society that is having trouble dealing with it’s problems. Hopefully they would see that the Babooners had a good sense of humor regarding the screwed up world in which they would see us living.

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  13. Well, I have some of the bagged waste matter as described earlier today by Jacque. It tends to pile up in a sealed container for a couple of weeks and then be taken away by a large, noisy truck to a place where there is much more of that type of thing. A place where no one – past or present – wants to be.

    I think Future Historians would be curious about the number and variety of hook-like tools they’d find in the remains of my home. There are at least a hundred of these. Most of them are made of metal. The newer ones are painted but the older ones (from my grandma) are plain silver metal. Some of them are small and have a very fine hook while others are quite large and have an enormous hook. Some of the old ones from my grandma are made of yellowed melamine; some newer ones are made of neon-colored plastic. There is one ivory one.

    The yarn might not survive the ages, but if it did there would be questions about the mix of yarns, threads, flosses, needles, beads of all sizes and varieties, fabrics and musical instruments all mixed together and scattered around the house. What kind of scatterbrain lived here?

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  14. Keys that don’t unlock anything, small tags engraved with pet names and phone numbers, wheat pennies.

    Maybe they will find my cell phone charger – no amount of sifting seems to turn it up for me; superior archaeological skills must be required.

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    1. The future historians will be led to my home by the scattering of small round pieces of metal engraved with the same number as they find on the front of the home and the small out-building in back. The pieces with be found throughout the immediate area, all leading to the same place. They will most likely conclude that house was a center for knowledge or perhaps a safe haven, as all the numbered tags will lead there.

      Our Fair Twixie can lose a collar like no other cat. We did find a cat collar this fall while raking, but it wasn’t hers. (no tag, so no way of knowing whose it really was). By rights, we should be raking up at least 3 of hers from this year alone.

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    2. We gave up on cat collars when our terrier used to drag our cats over the laminate floor by their collars. The cats were really good natured about being slid along the floor but we thought that it just encouraged the dog to use the cats as mops.

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  15. Scissors…we must have at least 30 pairs of scissors and most days all I can find is the kitchen scissors. Where the heck are all of them? I’m sure the future historians will ponder the meaning of so many scissors in one house.

    And books. I’ve been told that books are becoming obsolete, but you wouldn’t be able to tell that if all you had to go by was my house.

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  16. Throw rugs. My sister remarked when visiting that she’d counted 22 throw rugs, if you count the basement. We have hardwood floors, but why would I have so many throw rugs? And they may wonder why there is a tape measure in nearly every room, not to mention the scissors mentioned above! Will they be able to figure out what a letter opener is, if we eventually go paperless. And On the window sill here by the computer is a little brass thingy, not unlike an old skate key. I don’t even know what it is.

    When Joel was 2, I made (sewed) a set of colored felt Care Bears from a pattern I’d bought – I’m sure (if they still existed) those would mystify the FHA people like the handless Barbies and Cult of the Groovy (love the name) dolls.

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