Shake Your Tail Feathers

Today’s guest post comes from Wally, proprietor of Wally’s Intimida – home of the Sherpa Sport Utility Vehicle.

Today is a great day to buy a new Sherpa – the largest, most impressive vehicle on the road today! Great big cars are STILL hot, in spite of what some gloomy fun-killers say about the gas guzzler being an automotive dinosaur.

Because dinosaurs are still hot too!

Recent research shows that Oviraptors, a flightless, two-legged variety of dinosaur, had all the right equipment on board to flaunt a set of spectacular tail feathers solely for the purpose of attracting a mate. Scientists lament that the fossil record doesn’t do a good job of preserving these feathers, so we will probably never know exactly what kind of sinuous tail-shaking took place on the prehistoric dance floor.

But isn’t it encouraging to know that dinosaurs weren’t all about snarling and stomping and biting the heads off of smaller animals?

Sherpa-Peacock

In tribute, Intimida introduces the Sherpa Oviraptor edition, a mammoth SUV with a set of mechanical tail feathers that can do the very same thing the dinosaurs did – put on a flashy display to draw attention to the fact that YOU are driving a car that is absolutely ASTOUNDING!

Today’s automobiles have lost the feeling of excitement that made car owners of the 50’s and 60’s hunger for bigger and more elaborate tail fins. The Sherpa Oviraptor edition brings us back to those days of provocative, sensual display.

And a special bonus – from behind the wheel of your Sherpa, you can also deploy your feathers like a drag chute to help slow you down on a steep incline or if you simply forget that you’re expected to stop at the red lights like everybody else – as Sherpa owners are wont to do.

Come on down to Wally’s today! I’m ready and waiting to get you into a Sherpa Oviraptor with a drop-dead display that matches your eyes.

It’s a mighty big, mighty beautiful car!

What’s the most showy car you’ve ever owned? Or driven?

81 thoughts on “Shake Your Tail Feathers”

  1. Good morning. I do like showy cars, but never owned one. I did ride in a neighbors Porsche once. That was a very showy car. The biggest vehicle I ever owned was an used International pickup truck. The Mazda 3 that we now own is sort of sporty. We also own a Honda CRV which might be the fanciest car I have ever owned. It is much smaller than an Intimida, but it can haul lots of stuff. What I would like to have is a small front wheel drive pickup. As far as I know all of the small pickups have rear wheel drive and don’t hold the road well on the ice covered pavement that we sometimes have in the winter here in Minnesota.

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  2. Our daughter got to ride in her uncle’s BMW convertible, but hasn’t said anything about wanting one herself. We tend to buy new vehicles and keep them for 10+ years, so it seem like we are always driving an old vehicle. The fanciest vehicle I ever drove is probably our newer Honda van. By the way, Jim, we had a front wheel drive smaller pickup and it was terrible on ice.

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    1. Good to know, Renne, that the front wheel drive small pickup is not the answer for driving on icy roads in the winter. Front wheel drive cars seem to do better in ice and snow, so I thought that front wheel drive on small pickups might make them go better on ice. We also usually keep our cars for a long time and don’t get new ones until the ones we have are nearly ready to fall apart.

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      1. The trick with the front wheel drive small pickup in winter seems to be buying tubes of sand and putting those in the bed to provide some weight over the back wheels. It’s not a perfect solution, but it helps a lot (at least according to the small pickup owners i have known).

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        1. My Honda CRV has 4 wheel drive. When four wheel drive trucks first became popular there was a joke about them which went: “With a 4 wheel drive you will just get stuck farther out in a muddy field”.

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  3. I am currently embarking on my once a decade trek at car buying. So far none of them have feathers but that may be more attractive than the other options available.

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  4. Rise and Shine Baboons!

    I will watch these answers with interest–my answer is nearly identical to Renee’s–10 yrs, rode in someone else’s, etc. My guess is Baboons are not a tail feathers kind of crowd. I would like a fun antique car to tool around in. That could be fun.

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  5. I have mostly owned highly practical cars – mostly compact cars. My current car – the silver VW Beetle – is probably the closest I’ve come to “showy.” It certainly turns heads…at least if you’re under 10 and into playing “slug bug.” 🙂 Maybe if my brother does wind up buying one of the Tesla Roadsters, he’ll let me drive that. They sure are showy. Gotta wonder, though, does an all-electric car still make a “vroom vroom” sound when you rev it?…guessing not. Pity.

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    1. I’m thinking that for what you end up paying for a Tesla, you should be able to get the sound feature added without too much trouble

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  6. As a young man, I fell in love with sports cars. It was all theoretical, as I had never touched one. I thought I had a chance to buy a Sunbeam Alpine, but couldn’t quite come up with the cash. That’s when I decided the sportiest thing I could afford was a motorcycle. And that terrified my mother, driving her to desperate measures.

    She and my dad sat me down and said that they had decided to buy me a car. They mostly wanted to keep me from getting the motorcycle. They couldn’t stomach the idea of a foreign car (which were pretty rare then), so they bought the closest thing to a “sports car” made in America — which was a white 1967 Corvair Monza Spyder convertible. And that became my first car.

    The ’67 Corvair wasn’t the “unsafe at any speed” econobox that Ralph Nader hated. It was actually kinda sexy, with a gentle Coke bottle shape, a European style shifter and a turbocharged engine. To me, it was not quite a sports car, but a touching example of how much my mother cared for me. And in its own way it was “showy.” I loved that car right up to the day it burned up in my parents’ driveway. Corvairs weren’t really sports cars, but they sure made an impressive bonfire when they burned . . . which was rather often. So many Corvairs burned up that my car, had I been able to keep it, would be a collector’s item today.

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        1. Corvairs like mine had a design flaw that didn’t get corrected when they fixed the problem of the car flipping over on hard turns. Specifically, there was a tunnel from the engine in the back up toward the front of the car. Electric lines ran through there, right next to gas lines. For some reason the electrical lines tended to short out, and then you had a spark right next to a gas line. Poof! Call the fire department!!!

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  7. I’ve been enamored with Corvettes ever since I saw my first one as a kid in the 1960s. Being the frugal old miser I am, I’ve never even considered owning one, so I did the next best thing: rented one for a day to celebrate my 50th birthday (can you say”MIDLIFE CRISIS?”)

    We were in Palm Springs in April and we took the car to Temucula over the back highways. SHe was a silver convertible with black top, so naturally we had to drive some of the way with the top down. I was too afraid of damaging the car in some way to rev up the speed to respectable Corvette speed, but on the way back we hopped on I-10 for part of the trip and I did manage to edge it up almost to ninety mph for a few seconds.

    What a thrill I had driving that baby! Had the most comfortable car seat I’ve ever sat in. I felt like I was sitting in my Mom’s lap getting a hug from her. The power of that engine was something to behold, too. Accelerating from 0-30 on city streets took about 2 seconds. I’m sure it would have been instantaneous had I floored it, but I wasn’t looking to spoil the day by getting a speeding ticket.

    Cost for that day of indulgence was about $450 + gas (not even a tank). It was worth every cent. I got the Corvette jones out of my system, lived in a fantasy world for 24 hours, and didn’t have to worry about insurance or dings or envious cretins doing nasty things to the finish like keying one side or the other.

    Now i’m happy as a clam driving around my 1991 Toyota Camry with 225,000 miles on it and covered with bumper stickers–sometimes the wife thinks they’re the only thing holding the body together, but the stickers are only on the bumpers … so far …

    Chris in Owatonna

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    1. Glad you had the opportunity to have the Corvette experience, Chris, and glad you survived it. Husband’s boss bought one a few years ago, but got rid of it after he came close to killing himself in it. He couldn’t resist the temptation to test the muscle under the hood.

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      1. Muscle cars are definitely scary. Maybe too much power if you’re not used to it. Very easy to tap the gas and be going 20 mph over the speed limit, plus the ride is so smooth, you might not realize you’re going so fast and misjudge a turn.

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  8. Morning all. I’m in the same class as Renee and Jacque… I buy them new and then run them until they start to fall apart. My Honda Civic made it to 15 and my current Saturn is almost 10. The Teenager cares about cars, but about all I can muster is remembering where I’m parked.

    That being said, whenever I have to go to Hawaii for work, I always rent a red Pinto convertible and drive it all over the place. Since there aren’t that many roads on the islands, it’s the only place I drive without getting lost when I travel for work. I think of it as the perk I get for all those air miles!

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    1. Pinto made a convertible??
      My wife’s first car was a lt blue Pinto. I put a bag of calf feed in the back for weight in the winter and after that it always smelled like molasses. Not such a bad smell…

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      1. Maybe I get a Mustang? Some kind of horse….. this is exactly why I shouldn’t take part in any discussion of cars!!!

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        1. I’m sure you mean Mustang. They’re still made. The Ford Pinto ranks high in any contest for the worst car ever made. The particular weakness of the Pinto was a gas tank located right by the rear bumper, a gas tank that could explode if struck.

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        2. Big difference between a Pinto and a Mustang when it comes to cars. Guessing you’re driving the Mustang. Pintos are the ones that could explode in a ball of flame if you were rear-ended as I recall – Mustangs are the sporty little numbers that were really popular in the 60s and 70s and were recently re-designed and have been out again for a few years. My brother had a ’66 Mustang hard top (not a convertible) that he sold before I was old enough to drive it. It should have been mine – I was born the same year as the car, after all. Maybe I’ll forgive him in another 20 years or so for selling it…maybe.

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        3. When I get my 1968 Candy Apple Red Mustang convertible, it will be the flashiest car I will have owned. Next to it, the Mercedes 450SL (maroon) I plan to own will look downright sedate.

          Lest the Mustang think it can rest on its laurels, however, there is also a pink 1956 Studebaker Flight Hawk on my shopping list.

          But first, I have to build the correct climate-controlled garage…….

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        4. MID, those three cars you mentioned are right up at the top of my list. I would also add in one of those Little Deuce Coupes.

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        1. I would be the first person to tell Beth-Ann that I should be the LAST person she should consult on cars.

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  9. I’ve driven mostly Honda Civics for as long as I can remember. They are economical, reliable and practical but they will go faster than you can believe in a very short period of time. It isn’t wise to use cruise control in the winter and my rule has been to turn it off and leave it off but I have been making some use of it on the way to Northfield from Waterville. I don’t want another speeding ticket and the roads have been dry. Cruise control and AC came with my 2002 Honda Civic EX which I bought used in 2007. Those are the fanciest features I’ve ever had in a car. My friend has a Subaru with heat in the seats – sigh…

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      1. did you know you can buy a new saab for almost nothing. the cutting loose of saab form gm laft the cars on the market in no mans land. i told my son to buy one. timing is a once in a lifetime opportunity. they are great cars for no money right now and you already have the mechanic.

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        1. I had a used Saab 900. 1979 I think. That was also a fun car with the key between the seats and the hood opened to the front and the left windshield wiper moved 180 degrees while the right only went 45 degrees which I thought was the funniest thing I’d ever seen.

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        2. where exactly is this noman’s land you speak of, tim? Serious inquiry here, my benighted Buick is working my last nerve.

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        3. my son bought a bmw in june or july. at that time saab gahad just been cut loose and the new ones wer 4000 dollars because there was no parent company anymore for warranty etc. i told him to buy one. ill research for you and see what i can find out.

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  10. The “fanciest” car I’ve ever owned was a 1973 Mercury Capri; a sporty little dark green number with tan leather seats. I loved that car. I drove it until the hinges to the driver’s door rusted so bad that the door literally fell off one day when I opened it. I bought it brand new, the only new car I’ve ever owned, and it disintegrated into a heap of rust in less than ten years, but it sure was cute while it lasted.

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  11. well my fancy car fettish has followed me through life. as a high school kid i drove a vw bus which was not a good glamour vehicle but was the correct car for me at the time but as a jr in high school my mom got a 70 t bird. wow what a piece of sex on wheels i loved it. hippy in a dream machine was a fun role in the 70’s then i traded the vw for a fiat convertable which was all sex no logic it was broken al the time and no mechanics in minnesota, then a 73 buick riveria with the duck tail back was a great car for the young man about town. my company bought a white lincoln town car back when they were monsters with the black windows and the sun roof. it was like driving the living room around. when i was in high school my drummers mom bought a sexy little 72 volvo 1800. a 2 seater volvo had in the line for about 20 years. i told her to take good care of our car and she did. she called me to be sure i still wanted it and about 7 or 8 years ago i bought it from her with under 100,000 miles on it. sweet car sits in my garage. i dont think i have put 1000 miles on it. and i also have the old dream machine of my youth the jaguar vander plas with the little walnut tables that fold down for the people in the back seat to set their stuff on while the driver is taking them down the road. i drive a hybrid by day but i am an automitive sex fiend by night.

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  12. Morning–
    I read this earlier and spent some time thinking about various vehicles I’ve driven over the years. Like most of us, I couldn’t really come up with anything ‘fancy’ fancy. Various trucks and tractors but none were the newest and / or shiniest.
    Can ‘showy’ mean ‘eyesore’?
    I had a postal jeep once, (maybe 1979 vintage?) that I bought third or fourth hand. It was painted dark green. Drove on the left. And the doors slid open and the back door had a bungee cord on it or it would pop open when you hit RR tracks. Flat, steel dashboard and certainly no frills; the radio (an add on) was down between the front seats and it had GREAT speakers; which I only recently took off my TV set.
    I used it mostly when I worked for the Ag Department measuring grain bins and fields. And if you went over about 55 MPH it swerved back and forth so bad it made you sea sick.Took it on I90 once and up to 70 MPH and it was the scariest 5 minutes of my life.
    A rock hit the oil filter knocking a hole in it and I wrecked the engine… but that sure was a unique car while it lasted.
    My first car was my Grandma’s 1967 Plymouth Valiant. No heat and the door locks didn’t work but it was built like a tank. A great first car.
    Now I’m in a Ford Escape with 120,000 miles on it. And my farm truck is a big red 4wd Dodge pick up w/ a V10 engine in it. Almost as bad as the Intimida… but I bought it used in 2000 and that’s what it came with. I only drive it when I have to. Maybe next year I’ll trade it in for something that gets more than 10 MPG.

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    1. on a farm ill bet that truck gets used correctly. my office partner inherited the dodge v 10 and the 7 mpg killed him. 700 miles round trip to his cabin cost 100 gallons of gas. it had a plow and a hitch capable of pulling trees out of the ground but he traded it for a different vehicle capable of pulling a monster boat spring and fall.

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    1. meant to put that up with the others but this was a special car that deserved to be places alone. it was wide enought o lay dow cross ways in the trunk. it went 100 mph with no problems. it was meant for luxary but i went on mountain trails too. 73 riv i drove from 75-78 canadian rockies, california and on to the world of rock and roll and business. a fine line but one that had to be drawn.

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  13. My ‘Mid-Life Crisismobile’ is a 1996 Honda Del Sol. About the same size as a Mazda Miata but fewer were made and they’re harder to find. 2-seat hardtop convertible (the top actually goes in the trunk), gets good gas mileage, you can fit stuff in the trunk (even with the top in there), and it is funfunfun! to drive. Found one with only 50,000 miles on it out in Bangor, ME. Flew in, checked it out, bought it, and drove it back. Small, low, and quick enough to be fun but still somewhat practical and not a ‘cop magnet.’ I only wish it had a/c but I still love it.

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    1. That “not a cop magnet” is an important qualifier. Sounds like a nice car; don’t know that I’ve ever seen one.

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  14. When I joined Wasband in NYC, 1974, he was driving a ’66 Porsche 911. I could drive a stick, but it took me a while to get the hand of the Porsche. Was easy to slide into a parking space on Brooklyn’s side streets IF you could find a place… we usually took the subway if we were going somewhere in the city.
    http://www.bing.com/images/search?q=1966+porsche+911&id=82BCE6D7EF06B1530905C6D51E5D63590F4F5A75&FORM=IQFRBA#view=detail&id=82BCE6D7EF06B1530905C6D51E5D63590F4F5A75&selectedIndex=0

    That’s the sexiest car I’ve driven, but my true love was my ’72 Beetle my dad bought and then I paid him back…
    http://www.bing.com/images/search?q=1972+beetle&qpvt=1972+beetle&FORM=IQFRML#view=detail&id=614686F7F6D9F8AC14CEA7C068A8D978D222DAD4&selectedIndex=21

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    1. I loved Beetles when I was a little kid–someone in our neighborhood had one that was painted sky blue with clouds all over it. By the time I was old enough to drive the VW Beetle was long gone, and when they brought them back, they came back modernized and too expensive. My ex-hippie friend had a VW bus in the day, and they even replaced the engine themselves a couple of times. I think she still has the classic repair-it-yourself manual stashed away somewhere.

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  15. The coolest car I’ve ever ridden in was a 1930s sedan. I don’t remember the make or model, just your typical “gangster car” like in an Edward G. Robinson movie. Black, with horsehair seats, not the most comfortable ride, but what style! The friend who owned it was a transplant from New Orleans and not well versed in winter. He was quite chagrined when he was proudly showing it off right after buying it, only to be informed that he’d probably want to buy a cheap second car and keep the antique in the garage lest the salt and other chemicals eat the poor thing alive. I’ve mostly fallen out of touch with him so I have no idea whether he still owns it or not; I suspect he may have sold it before he left for grad school, alas.

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    1. I think I test-drove a used third-gen Mustang when I first got my license. It was red. It didn’t run well. I ended up driving my dad’s old car, a 1984 Tempo, until a woman strung out on cold medicine ran into my passenger door and the insurance totaled it. After that I got my faithful Honda Civic, who will probably be the last car I ever own.

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        1. I’m driving the last car I’ll ever own, my beloved 2002 Outback. I’m aging at a far faster rate than the Outback, and there are more spare parts that I could plug into it than spare parts for me.

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        2. I hope to get at least another 70,000 miles out of her, but yeah, I want to give up driving. Other drivers are starting to really scare me; it’s not easy driving a subcompact in an SUV world. Not to mention that it’s unlikely I’ll be able to afford both a car payment and insurance when Kuro dies. I am the antithesis of mechanically minded, so a cheap used car would probably be a disaster. My roommate has never had a driver’s license thanks to her eyesight, so she’s opened my mind to the carfree lifestyle. Neither of us ride bicycles, which would make carlessness easier (besides her vision, we both have balance issues), but I’ve been casually eyeing cargo trikes.

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  16. My favorite car was a Buick Skyhawk like this:
    http://www.mikedunton.com/h-bodies/1979_skyhawk/index.htm
    Same color too; just like this one. I knew that car intimately. And I mean it that way. Put two clutches in it (because I messed up the first one), worked on the engine, fuel lines, brakes. That car taught me a lot. Plus, it was a chick magnet. I mean, look at it; with that sloped hatchback?? I met Kelly with that car. 🙂
    After that went to a Eurosport and eh, it was just a car.
    http://www.cardomain.com/ride/2430332/1986-chevrolet-celebrity/

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  17. The hottest car I ever drove–not “showy” but HOT–was a Subaru Impreza WRX. It comes from an odd category of automobile: the wolf in sheep’s clothing. Subaru Imprezas have been prosaic little economy cars with a curious pop-eyed expression. But the WRX model of Impreza is so much fun to drive it is sinful. If you stomp the accelerator you get slammed back against the seat like that machine they used to subject astronauts to high G forces. At the end of my WRX test drive I smiled sadly and walked away. I figure I’d have gotten a speeding ticket at the rate of one per month.

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  18. Like several other Baboons, I don’t have great additions to this topic. I am a drive-them-into-the-ground type.
    My first car was a bright orange Beetle (’70?). I did love that car even without heat or working windshield wipers or windows (that led to a very scary moment on the I94 bridge over the Mississippi when a big truck threw a windshield full of slush on me. Windshield wipers were no help and I couldn’t even open the window to wipe off. I could only see behind me in the mirror so I looked in that useless direction as I blindly made my way over to the shoulder. Whew!)
    I’m currently driving a 15 year old Civic which has been berry berry good to me.
    I’m thinking of a Prius for my next but my sister has heard that they are low slung and not good in snow. Has anyone here heard about or experienced Priusses-in-the-snow?

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    1. That’s three of us posting today with 15+ year-old Civics (mine will be 18 in a couple of months). Maybe we need to start a club…with jackets!

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    2. We’ve had a Prius since 2008 – haven’t had unusual trouble in snow, and there was snow for the first coupla years there…

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      1. I like the look of the current Chrysler 300. Didn’t realize there was a prior version. Shouldn’t be surprised, I just didn’t know. Kinda cool!

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  19. Showiest car I ever owned? ’67 Olds Cutlass Supreme, ’68 Ford Falcon with a vinyl roof, ’84 Buick Century station wagon, ’93 Ford Escort wagon, ’95 Ford Escort wagon. Take your pick.

    The Falcon was kinda sporty and may have been considered a little showy when it was new, but it was slightly past its prime when it came to live with me.

    The showiest cars I have ever driven have been the vehicles I get from HourCar – I have a membership to get me through times when my own car is ailing. I have driven several Priuses, hybrids and hybrid electrics, including one that is bright red. They are very fun to drive. I can’t say how they are in snow and ice, though – never drove one in bad weather. Maybe next time we have an ice storm I’ll give it a try.

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