Here’s a Super Bowl poem from Trail Baboon’s rhyming poet laureate, Schulyer Tyler Wyler. A common question on the Monday after the world’s largest remaining Roman Numeraled Event is “Did you watch the Super Bowl?” I suggested that phrase as a title for the poem, and told STW he could come up with the rest as long as it doesn’t go on for too many verses.
STW said he was willing to take on this project under three conditions:
- He could base the poem on the rhythm and rhyme scheme of the song “Do You Hear the People Sing?” from Les Miserables. “I just saw the new film version and that stupid song is stuck in my head,” he said. “‘Do You Hear The People Sing’ and ‘Did You Watch The Super Bowl’ have the same number of syllables, so I should be able to do it in ten minutes flat, and maybe this will help me banish the thing from my brain at long last.”
- I would not require him to actually watch the game or know anything about it.
- I would pay him in advance.
Since I AM interested in watching the game and did not want to have to come up with a blog post for today, and since STW and I always deal in make-believe money, I agreed to pay him $1,000 pretend dollars and he got to work immediately.
For reference, here’s the original song, from the 1998 film version.
Did you watch the Super Bowl?
There was a lot of stuff to see.
There was a ton of advertising
pushing stuff that’s not for me.
There were men who came to play
fighting about an oblong ball
but what they did I cannot say
for I don’t recall.
I saw puppies and a baby.
Sloppy kissing and a car.
Some beer was drunk by people
but don’t ask me who they are.
It all was a blur, and so noisy.
I watched in a bar!
Did you see the Super Bowl?
Yes but it all went by so quick.
There was a time when I blacked out.
I’m sure the nachos made me sick.
There were fortunes that were lost.
There was a bunch of money won.
But it did not appear to me
anyone had fun.
There were folks with painted faces
wearing beads for Mardi Gras.
There were men so overweight
they needed girdles and a bra.
And that was my family, I hope that
nobody else saw!
Did you see the Super Bowl?
Well yes I knew that it was on.
And I suppose I watched a little
bit while stifling a yawn.
I am sure they’ll play again.
Two super teams will get their shot.
And which teams played the game this year
I will have forgot.
I’m pretty sure I did not get my make-believe money’s worth from rhyming poet laureate Schuyler Tyler Wyler, but that’s what the morning after the Super Bowl is for – waking up with the feeling that you’ve just thrown away a bunch of time and money on something meaningless.
And I think he was lying about not watching the game. That line about blacking out is a clear reference to the 3rd quarter power failure at the Super Dome.
What do you do when the electricity goes out?
Trail Baboon 
When we lived right on the North Shore, it happened often and sometimes for many hours or on a few occasions, days. We were fully prepared. Kept a fire going in the fireplace, then soon, and better, we had a fire already going in the fireplace-insert stove. We cooked on that stove, played family games in front of it, slept in front of it. Used kerosene lanterns and flashlights. Put the frozen stuff in a cooler outside, refrigerator stuff in a cooler in the garage. Had a battery radio. Couple of times had parties wit the neighbors. Road in front of us was was once closed for 5 days, no power fro 7 days, no school until the power came back. Kids went sliding. A neighbor took us into town to shop. Grocery store and a few others were open–the power was only off two days there. Among our favorite memories.
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Of course, metaphorically, my electricity blinks and sputters, browns out and blacks and only rarely power surges.
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Good morning. Like, Clyde, I have had the experience of dealing with a long power outage of several days when a heavy ice storm did massive damage here in southern Minnesota. We don’t have a wood burning stove, but we did manage to keep fairly warm using a kerosene heater. When our furnace went out in the winter, but we still had electricity, we used small electric heaters to keep us warm. Recently I bought a gas powered electric generator that I plan to use to provide power for the electric heaters. I don’t want to use the kerosene heater again because there is a risk of carbon monoxide poisoning when using it inside the house.
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OT At the end of the blog comments, yesterday, PJ said she would not be here for a while due to something that has made her very sad. Best wishes to you PJ, in dealing with whatever it is that made you so sad.
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Lately what I do when the power goes out is listen to Husband grump around the house about it…Thankfully, when it happens here, it tends to be in the summer time – and seems most often to be related to high-draw on the source on hot nights with lots of air conditioners running. So mostly we sit in the dark and sweat.
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Mostly I’m in the dark and sweat.
It’s day i of the actual move. We have 24 days to move 10 feet.Today pack books to sell or trash. After that, it will be easy until I get to the art part.
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Hope the move goes as smoothly as possible – I’m sure it’s hard to shed more “stuff” – especially your art things.
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I look forward to the lights going off for a while, since I want to feel the satisfaction of using our remote-starting gas stove to keep the house warm. We had it installed after a three day power outage in 2005, but we haven’t had a power outage since!
Hope you are doing ok, PJ.
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I’m deeply concerned about her, but her note does not seem to welcome contacts from us on this. It leaves one confused about how to be a friend in this case.
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Morning–
I’ve got a big tractor driven generator but haven’t needed it in several years, thankfully, knock on wood.
They say to run them for a few minutes every 6 months to keep it working and I haven’t moved this out of the shed in those several years so not sure it still works. I should look into that…
Way back in the old days, if the power went off at milking time, Dad would park the truck in front of an open door with the headlights shining into the barn, and hook a garden hose from the barn vacuum line to a valve he had installed on the truck engine and we could still milk that way. Slowly, but it could be done.
Once we got a pipeline milking system that didn’t work anymore and that’s when we got the generator.
I think after the 1991 ice storm our power was off about two days. So I’d run the tractor long enough to milk and do chores and get supper made, then turn it off at night for a while.
We have electric heat so would be cold with out electricity. No fireplace either. Dark I can manage. Cold….not so much.
Take care, PJ.
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I curse the darkness, then light some candles (after cranking up the combination solar/crank flashlight so I can find the matches needed to light the candles).
Chris in Owatonna
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🙂
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Hee hee – that adage makes me think of the classic Peanuts cartoon – Linus, carrying a candle, tells Charlie Brown that it’s better to light a single candle than curse the darkness. Charlie Brown says, “That’s true, although there will always be those who will disagree with you.” The last frame shows Lucy in the dark, shaking her fist and yelling “YOU STUPID DARKNESS!”
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We used to get a lot of outages here, mostly in warm weather or during storms. I had an argument once with a NSP representative who finally admitted that older neighborhoods (mine was developed in the 1920s) are troublesome for NSP since people keep adding air conditioners, and unless NSP is paying close attention the neighborhood that was getting enough power soon becomes underpowered. NSP knew how to calculate the electrical needs of new neighborhoods, but older ones “creeped” up in demand.
When the power disappears I get panicky. I mostly dread losing the internet and e-mail, my two main connections to the outside world. For the most part, I get by with a camping lantern so I can read and battery driven radios so I can listen to MPR.
One power outage rattled me badly as I kept discovering new ways I rely upon electricity. I remember panicking and thinking I should use the toilet while it still worked. And then I remembered that while I depend on electricity for many things, my toilet is not powered by electricity!
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yes I watched the super bowl
i was there when the lights went out
i was rooting for san fransisco
they were playing so bad it made me shout
then the second half began
cousin jericho ran the ball
one harbaugh having fun
and the other had no fun at all
then down in just rebuilt new orleans
we saw the power fail
Ii the same place that katrina
held those folks as if in jail
but now these captive dandies
jjust ordered another ale
then the lights returned once more
and my niners began to play
i happy for the change of fate
on this super bowl sunday
they made a valiant effort
fought the noble fight
but the team from baltimore
hung on to win that night
but the thing that’s most remembered
is that the lights went out
and they didnt run commercials
even though thats what they’re all about
cause the sponsers pay 4 million
not during pee breaks theres no doubt
and the super bowl has passed now
only one commercail worth a damn
chryslers ode to farmers
with paul harvey from the can
it came late but it was powerful
it tugged at my heart strings
this super bowl was super
the ad one of its strongest things
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Nice summary, tim. I haven’t watched a SB in decades but son#2 and I decided to watch this time. It was an exciting game. I didn’t have any knowledge of the teams and who was expected to win (I like to root for the underdog). Son#2 thought that SF was favored so I went for the Ravens.
You’re right that the farmer ad was the best thing; so unusual for an ad.
http://youtu.be/AMpZ0TGjbWE
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thanks lisa it got me again.
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this gravitar isnt working so here i go back again
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As some of you may be aware, my daily life revolves around my constant laptop use: emails, posting on several different forums, and, of course staying on top of the news hourly. Being so attached to this virtual interplay with life outside the cottage has allowed me to be ridiculously sedentary and, with the exception of several hours of highly vigorous dancing on one week end night, has become the center of my daily routine. I worried about what I’d miss for six days while on the cruise, especially in the political realm.
Upon a long day of air travel and layovers, I was far too exhausted when I got home to do anything but import 100 photos then crash. I slept 10 hours before making coffee and rushing to my laptop, eager to learn six days worth of movement in the country and read several dozen emails.
Imagine my upset when I discovered that Wayzata was in a power outage which had gone on for over eight hours?!! There have been few occasions in my life in which I truly did not know what to “do with myself”, but this was one of them. My phone, cable TV, and internet (bundled) were all not working for hours. Eventually, they fixed the problem and I rejoiced more for the return of these vital services than I can put into words. My next discovery was that not much had actually happened in the world with the passage of six days anyway!
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CB – I know I’ve been off the trail for a few days, so I might have missed it, but how was the cruise?
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Thanks for asking – it was worth every dollar and every minute of logistics anxiety I spent before embarking!! My daughter got the first break in her adult life from regular crises on her 92-horse boarding ranch; the first string of 8 hours of sleep a night, and came back determined to do a cruise again next year. It was a delight for me to witness her relaxing and being nourished. The 19-year old grand daughter, on the other hand, will never get a free cruise from me again. Her demeanor was acceptable, but when her mom begged her (with pay) to do the 3AM barn work only a few hours after arriving home and she said that she’d be “too tired”, I was furious. Her mom’s sacrificed and given way too much for years for this child but the entitlement overrides all else. I’m still pissed off about this.
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I didn’t watch the game at all.
I made a roast instead.
I also went to bell choir practice.
I also baked some bread.
I made some ginger cookies
from dough that I had frozen,
I was very happy and content
with the tasks that I had chosen.
I made Roesti potatoes, too,
brown and full of cheese,
Husband was at work, so I could
cook just as I pleased.
I do not like to see grown men
at risk for more concussions.
I know my views on this are harsh,
So thus ends this discussion.
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bravo
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Nice.
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I’m with you, Renee. Though not as ambitious in the kitchen.
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i love vacationing in yellowstone. the scenery the trails the woildlife. we can as a family alternate between roughing it (a tent) or luxuary (a rustic cabin) on set of cabins has an phone where we used to try to get internet back in n the phone modem days. tere are no towers for phones so you are kind of forced into seclusion. it is amazing what you come up with when the options call. sure everyone still palys solitare and skateboarding on the phone but the conversation, the walks , the other stuff that doesnt happen when electricity is present is refreshing. here on the homefornt i tend to do damage control and try to tell people to quit looking in the fridge to seee if everything is melting. i tell them we will get a cooler and fill it with ice and try to live out of that as much as possible. i generally have enough water to last and if i need to bring in heat in the winter i have propane and various scary propane options t keep us from freezing the pipe and we can boil water in the kitchen with gas to keep the chill off in that chunk of the house. candles flashlights and books in the winter, ice, guitar and a hammock in the summer. bring it on. i like the adventure.
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I didn’t watch the Super Bowl
Football makes me sick
Instead I watched the Puppy Bowl
The furballs give me a kick
Even after several hours out in the world, I can’t even tell you who was IN the Super Bowl and I didn’t know there had been a power outage.
Normallyif the power goes out at my house, it’s in the middle of the night, so usually I just go back to sleep. Suppose if I were up, reading by candlelight would be high on my priority list.
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Love it sherrilee
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I was a big football fan when I was young and still followed it not too many years ago. I don’t know if it was always a very violent game or if it has become more violent over the years. There may be some players who know how to avoid getting hurt and some that make an effort to not hurt other players. From what I can tell, there are many players who end up with very serious injuries and some very heavy hitting that is just considered part of the game by most or all of the people that play and watch football. I have more or less stopped being a football fan.
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Jim, the average NFL lineman has gained about 70 pounds in the last two decades. And gotten faster. Now how could that be? Better living through chemistry.
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That better living through chemistry is another problem. I think the guys that do that pay in the long run even if the authorities don’t catch them. There are side effects.
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Lance Armstrong is the most and best tested man in the history of sports. He never really got caught by a test. The conclusion is obvious: NFL, MLB, and NBA who test very poorly cannot catch much of anything.
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And they don’t want to
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You’re right Clyde Ed White in 1968 was the first Viking ever to weigh 300 lbs (
John michaels was vikings line coach lived across the street his son was vikes ballboy and my friend had lots of good inside stories) today it is common place today and sub 300 is puny for line
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Marvelous!!!
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I pretty much lost most of whatever interest I had in football when the Vikings moved indoors. Since the Packers were not in the Super Bowl (I pay attention just enough to know this and stay conversant, bless you, NPR), I didn’t even “watch it for the ads”.
I actually spent the earlier part of the day in an unexpectantly pleasant way and saw the Minnesota Opera production of Doubt. I thought I had missed my chance to see it (communications snafu) and at best thought it would be “interesting”.
I usually watch any live theatrical event with a mental legal pad, taking notes (habit of years in the business). Not this one. Enjoyed every bit of it all the way through. Nice to see all the pieces working well together. I had not seen the movie, so had no idea what to expect from the plot.
I guess I am glad the Ravens won. Goodness knows, the city of Baltimore can use a break. (see, I do sort of pay attention -lived in Buffalo the last time they lost a Super Bowl, disheartening doesn’t begin to describe it)
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“Doubt” was quite good, wasn’t it? I have learned (after the mess that was the operatic version of “The Handmaid’s Tale”) to be dubious of most “modern” operas. I have been pleasantly surprised a couple of times. This was one of them. The mezzo who sang the role of the boy’s mother was knock-the-doors-wide-open fantastic (saw her years ago singing “Carmen” – she is a memorable talent).
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I hope tomorrow will bring us some news about PJ. If you are reading this, PJ, please know that there is a lot of concern about your sadness and that many good wishes go out to you.
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Indeed PJ – I’m sure many of us have been holding you close in our thoughts.
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Haven’t had a power outage in a few years. I have one of those little clip-on booklights, so I am pretty content to just sit and read. There is always plenty of reading material close at hand. Or sometimes I put the book down and just sit and listen to the house. It sounds very different when nothing is humming in the background – just the ticking of the battery-operated clocks and the purring of the felines.
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