2023, Fantasy, Food, gardening, Nature

Watermelon Gone Wild?

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I knew when I planted two little watermelon seedlings in one bale that I was probably making a mistake.  While I’ve never grown watermelon before, I’ve certainly heard that it likes to spread out.  And spread out it has – it has completely overtaken the bale, spilling out over three of the four sides (I’ve been pushing it away on the 4th side where the cherry tomato plant is trying to hold it’s own).

You know me, had to google “watermelons gone wild” to see what funny stuff was out in cyberspace.  The first thing I discovered is that the comedian Gallagher, who was famous for smashing watermelon, passed away last year. I remember thinking he was hysterical back in his heyday.   Here is a clip with more smashing and less talking:

I also googled watermelon books.  There are a lot of kids’ watermelon books; none of them seemed all that exciting to me.  I did find Moons of Jupiter by Alice Munro with big watermelon slices on the cover.  Can’t find anything online that explains this so I requested the book from the library.  We’ll have to see.

But the biggest watermelon issue for me is the logistics.  If we get even a lukewarm harvest, what the heck are we going to do with all this watermelon? There are just two of us and I expect we’ll also be busy eating tomatoes at the same time. 

Any good watermelon books?  How about recipe for using up watermelon?

45 thoughts on “Watermelon Gone Wild?”

  4. Rise and Shine, Baboons,

    I love watermelon, so let me be the first to offer to take one/buy one from you. Recipes are limited, unless you want to spike one with vodka and become a watermelon/alcoholic. Beyond that, my only suggestion is donate them to a food shelf.

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  5. Well, WP decided against me yesterday and logged me out. Now I’m logging back in all the time.

    I really don’t know of any recipes for watermelon. The only thing I can think of is the large watermelons cut in half and filled with fruit. Not very helpful, am I?

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    1. Yeah, and that was just one watermelon. We’ll see what kind of harvest I get off these two plants. They they’re going a little crazy.

      The one thing that wasn’t in that last post is an update on how freezing all of that fruit went. Even frozen for smoothies. It was way too much for YA and I; the following summer I ended up throwing out three or four bags of cubed melons.

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        1. Those both look wonderful.

          I also make a Greek-style watermelon salad. There’s nothing very scientific about the recipe, but in addition to watermelon, I toss in some chopped tomatoes, cucumber, sweet or red onion, and pitted kalamata olives. A few capers don’t hurt. Add a handful of crumbled feta cheese and some chopped, fresh parsley and mint. Sprinkle the whole thing with some good extra virgin olive oil, a little red-wine vinegar, salt and pepper, and toss. I sometimes use fresh lemon juice instead of the vinegar. It’s wonderfully light and refreshing on a hot day.

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  8. It just seems like watermelon doesn’t really need a recipe.

    My mom used to put Vaseline all over a watermelon and throw it in the lake for us to play with. I’m not sure how good that is for the lake water, Vaseline being a petroleum product and all, but it was just enough to grease it up good and get us all covered with Vaseline too. Have you ever played with a greased watermelon in a lake? It was fun and next to impossible to fish it back out of the water.

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  9. I was told this by Grandma l. My maternal grandparents lived and attempted produce farming in Arkansas back in the Great Depression. They had an excellent crop of watermelons going until my teenaged uncles plugged them all in search for one to eat. Ruined the entire crop and Grandpa. The family (including my mother) ended up living in a railroad siding boxcar in Fargo. Dad comes into the story later. In a way, I owe my life to watermelon.

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  10. My grandfather had several gardens in different places on the farm here. There are still places my family refers to as ‘Grandpas garden’. One area was on the backside of a field. I’m not sure how come it ended up over there next to the trees unless Dad wouldn’t give him any better ground. Or maybe it was Grandpa’s idea. Must not have been as many deer back then. Eventually he moved the garden down by the house and he had a little 6′ x 6′ shack there with an Adirondack chair and his tools.
    He grew strawberries (why I will not pick strawberries these days) ground cherries, grapes, and I remember him hauling sand in and trying peanuts and watermelons. I know he did popcorn too.
    I remember eating peanuts and popcorn; I don’t remember him getting any watermelons.

    Fourth of July we’d go to my Grandmothers house to watch the fireworks and have watermelon.

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        1. Ah! I see. Yes, it’s usually not a good idea to force kids to do that kind of work consistently lest they develop a life-long aversion to it. It took me a long time to feel neutral about my vacuum cleaner, and I never did manage to get over my aversion to ironing, for that very reason.

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      1. I think this might be it!

        A poem: “Reflections on a Gift of Watermelon Pickle Received from a Friend Called Felicity”

        by John Tobias

        During that summer
        When unicorns were still possible;
        When the purpose of knees
        Was to be skinned;
        When shiny horse chestnuts
        (Hollowed out
        Fitted with straws
        Crammed with tobacco
        Stolen from butts
        In family ashtrays)
        Were puffed in green lizard silence
        While straddling thick branches
        Far above and away
        From the softening effects
        Of civilization;

        During that summer–
        Which may never have been at all;
        But which has become more real
        Than the one that was–
        Watermelons ruled.

        Thick imperial slices
        Melting frigidly on sun-parched tongues
        Dribbling from chins;
        Leaving the best part,
        The black bullet seeds,
        To be spit out in rapid fire
        Against the wall
        Against the wind
        Against each other;

        And when the ammunition was spent,
        There was always another bite:
        It was a summer of limitless bites,
        Of hungers quickly felt
        And quickly forgotten
        With the next careless gorging.

        The bites are fewer now.
        Each one is savored lingeringly,
        Swallowed reluctantly.

        But in a jar put up by Felicity,
        The summer which maybe never was
        Has been captured and preserved.
        And when we unscrew the lid
        And slice off a piece
        And let it linger on our tongue:
        Unicorns become possible again.

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    1. Have tried it but wasn’t to my taste. I’m not crazy about salt on top of sweet. Salted caramel also doesn’t do it for me!

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  15. I doubt you can make the pickles today. The rind has been bred just about out of it, unlike the thick rind from which my mother made it
    Clyde

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  16. In watermelon sugar the deeds were done and done again as my life is done in watermelon sugar. I will tell you about it because I am here and you are distant.
    ― Richard Brautigan

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