Automotive, holidays, Kids, Mysteries, Uncategorized

Driving Me Crazy

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When YA was first driving, I asked a good friend of mine, who had two daughters older than YA, “when will I be able to get in a car with her while she’s driving, and not fear for my life.”   Without even a blink, Lori said “when you stop getting a car with her.”  I laughed at the time but 13 years later, I realize she was absolutely right.

YA wanted to drive on Thanksgiving.  She said it was to see if she could get better mileage on her new car (she bought it in July) but I think it was really to show it off to the Thanksgiving crowd.  She drives closer to other cars than I do and it makes me nervous.  I put my foot out a couple of times as if I could brake.  YA thought this was pretty funny.

She did NOT think it was funny on the way home.  It was dark and a couple of times she pulled into a lane with very little space between us and the car in front.  I tell myself that she actually drives more these days than I do and she hasn’t had an accident yet.  But I’ll admit that at one point I gasped and threw my hands out in front of me.  It was involuntary.  She gave me a stern warning and I sat on my hands the rest of the way home.

I don’t have these kind of issues when I’m riding with other folks.  I went all over Nashville two weeks ago with my friend Pat driving and never flinched once!

Do prefer to be the driver or the passenger?

26 thoughts on “Driving Me Crazy”

  2. I prefer to drive. Robin is a somewhat nervous passenger and I see her sometimes gripping the dashboard or stomping the floorboard when there is no real reason (from the driver’s perspective everything is under control). And that, I think, is the difference between being a driver or a passenger—that sense of control. On those occasions when I am the passenger and Robin the driver, I am conscious of fighting the urge to grip the dash now and then. The car feels faster and the movements in traffic seem more abrupt when you are not directing them.

    Also, Robin invariably brings some handwork like knitting or crocheting whenever we drive anywhere. Certainly on long trips but even for a drive across town. I don’t have anything similarly portable to occupy myself so it works better if I drive.

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  4. DRIVER 100%! I’m never comfortable as a passenger, even in sparsely populated southern MN. I don’t even care to have my wife drive me around town, like when she picks me up at the car repair shop when I bring one car in for service.

    I think I’ve funneled that preference to always drive into the ability to drive every mile of a long road trip out west or wherever we go.

    Chris in O-town

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  7. Either, I guess, if it’s an experienced driver. I thought I would be nervous about Husband’s driving after the stroke, but after the appropriate testing, he seems to drive as well as he ever did. He does flinch sometimes when not needed (from my perspective), which does drive me nuts. As Bill noted, I know I’m in control of things…

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  8. I prefer to be the passenger. I truly don’t like driving, though I’m content enough to do it if importuned.

    Once, some years ago, with three teenagers in the back seat and a nervous spouse seated beside me pumping invisible brake pedals and throwing up her hands, I pulled over and got out. When asked “why?” I replied that since she was driving anyway, she might as well be behind the wheel.

    I got reprimanded.

    Now, 25 years later, I hold onto the locution, “If you want to drive, I’d happily switch seats with you.” That’s when someone’s eyes get closed and the ride goes silent.

    For all that, I prefer to be the passenger. As much as possible.

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  9. My children are both excellent drivers. Except my son has always lived in large cities and has that metality all the time. Neither of them has ever been in an accident except minor ones that were not their fault. My s-i-l is also an excellent driver. My rare medical trips to the Cities I leave in their hands, like in three weeks to NW-Abbott. I have told them both that if they see I need to stop driving to take my license away. I have done a couple dumb things on the streets on Mankato lately, streets that are full of rude and stupid drivers. I have moved to a bank very near me. The grocery store is close by which is where my pharmacy is.

    I have been close to stone deaf for three days from impacted wax. I should have dealt with it earlier but distracted by Sandra issues. Then it suddenly got terrible. The drug store stuff made it worse. Just got it done at clinic. But my hearing is bad. Nearest Costco is 85 mies away. Cannot afford the audiology ones. Other ones are junk.

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  11. I’m used to driving so it’s strange for me to be a passenger. I’m grateful if someone else wants to drive. I enjoy really looking around at things when someone else drives.

    I do get that nervous feeling when I’m the passenger, but only with certain drivers and in heavy city traffic. I feel that way when my brother drives; he is a very good driver, but fast, and he is very used to driving in city traffic. He’d be mad if I showed it. I’ve learned to sit on my hands or shove them in my pockets. I definitely prefer driving in the countryside on county roads or even gravel. Highway 14 in southern MN has improved a lot since they made a 4-lane but Highway 60 is still deadly, especially in winter, and I use it a lot. I don’t drive at night as often as I used to.

    OT: My new counters still aren’t done. They need to be anchored down with adhesive. Also, I still don’t have a kitchen sink. It needs to be plumbed with a new drain and a new faucet. I decided to do away with the garbage disposal and just go with a regular drain. Mr. Jensen said he would be here at 5 to finish it. History teaches me that it will be closer to 6 or maybe even tomorrow night. I’ll be glad when it’s done. All my kitchen stuff is out and stacked around my living room and dining room.

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      1. Yes, he finished them at 8 last night. I’m very pleased with the results, although there will be some minor habit changes as we discussed a couple days ago. Also, the presence of Mr. Jensen’s contractor truck and trailer has ruffled some Association feathers. I’m receiving multiple nasty-grams from the president, who lives across the green space from me.

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  12. Since I live alone, I am rarely the passenger. I don’t mind being the driver, except in very slow rush hour. With my recent injury, I need to be the passenger for at least a little while. I don’t like someone telling me how to drive so I try very hard not to be a backseat driver.

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    3. I’m two and one-half year older than my sister, but she had a drivers license years before I did. (She started smoking at fourteen, and my parents offered that they would pay for her to take driving lessons so she could drive when she turned 18 if she would quit smoking. I never smoked, so no such offer was forthcoming to me. She quit smoking just long enough to get her license, and she still smokes.)

      Wasband taught me how to drive in his 63 VW beetle on the back roads near Cheyenne. I don’t drive much anymore, my eyesight isn’t good enough, and I have trouble turning my head. So I drive only during daylight hours, and only in areas I know well.

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  15. My dermatologist examined a blotchy patch on the left side of my face and said “It looks like you’re usually on the driver’s side.” This is true.

    My older sister doesn’t have a driver’s license. Her husband is the driver. I’m the youngest.

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  16. Its funny how universal this experience is for parents.
    .
    My son ropen-wheel race car driver. I’ve watched him driving into a corner at 100 mph in the rain and I am confident in his ability.
    .
    But if he drives us home from the race track, I have to just close my eyes. SO nerve wracking!

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