Today’s post comes from Bart, the bear who found a smart phone in the woods.
Bart here, fading in and out of that wintertime state of torpor otherwise known as “hibernation”.
I’m not too excited about being awake right now, but as long as I’m up I do have a bone to pick with the people who make a big fuss over Groundhog Day.
Last year I said Groundhog Day could be lots more interesting if they made a big show out of rousting a bear to find out how much longer winter would last.
But nobody took me up on it. Yesterday came and went without even a knock on my door. Not that I have an actual door in my den, but you know what I mean. I waited around all morning hoping to be poked with a stick, but nothing happened.
Instead, all the coverage went to that stupid groundhog. Again.
So no, I’m not impressed that P. Phil “saw” his shadow. Casting a shadow is not a big deal in the animal world. Almost everybody can do it.
Rousting a bear would be much more active than waking a groundhog, and I can do a lot more than blink my eyes in the February sunshine. But I realize the whole groundhog thing is built around old fashioned “folk wisdom”, so I made up a little rhyme to get the bear rousting tradition going.
Wake a bear while he is nappin’
and he can tell you what will happen.
If he stomps upon your torso
spring’s delayed six weeks or moreso
If he bites you on your shoulder
March and April will be colder
But if he licks you on your face,
Spring will hurry here, apace.
Nice use of “apace,” eh? That’s Shakespeare. Let’s see a groundhog do that!
Share your favorite bit of folk wisdom.