Trail Baboon?

I was thinking I wanted this blog to have a familiar title  – something easy to recognize, but sly.  A turn of phrase that describes information that’s sent out solely for the purpose of observing the reaction of the audience. Something catchy but common.  However, somebody else has that title locked up, and so one must make do with the opportunity that one has.

Maybe “Braille Typhoon” would be better. “Teal Ballroom”?  I’m open to suggestions.

My name is Dale Connelly and I think I just emerged from a very long tunnel. When I went in, it was 1976 and Gerald Ford was the president. I was 20 years old and just got my first job with a radio station in a distant land – KRSW in Worthington, Minnesota. I was driving from Illinois and had been told to report to the manager’s home.

My car broke down in Iowa City and I arrived a day late. The man who hired me couldn’t wait around to welcome me to town – he and has family were headed to the big city – Sioux Falls – for the afternoon.

“Let yourself in,” he said. “We’ll be back by sundown.”

He didn’t know me. I’d sent him my resume, a powder blue document that featured a large picture of me wearing long, wispy, flippy hair and a polyester suit. The photo had to be big – it took up lots of necessary space.  I had no accomplishments to speak of and precious little training. He listened to a tape I made in college and we had talked on the phone just once.   Miraculously, it was enough to convince him that I was a safe bet to wander unsupervised through his house for a few hours. How could that be? I might have cleaned out the cupboards and made for the hills, but I chose to stay. He became my finest boss and a lifelong friend. It was a good start and I had a wonderfully long and rich career working for the same company for 34 years. Pretty remarkable.

I understand that kind of long-term work relationship is rare today. I wouldn’t know. I’ve been cloistered. Reporting to the same place for a paycheck for over three decades was a very peaceful and secure and comforting experience, but things change and everyone hits that dusty trail into the sunset eventually. It is my turn to take that walk and see what is over the next rise. No regrets.

But I’ll have to come up with a new resume. I don’t think that 1976 version will do the job.

If you were hiring someone to be your assistant, what qualifications would they need?