Photo credit: Nashville Convention & Visitors Corporation
On one of the afternoons I spent in Nashville with my friend, Pat, we went in search of a bakery that was listed online as “one of the best bakeries in Nashville”. We used her car’s GPS to find it; the area was quite busy as it was Sunday but we managed to find a free parking spot and Pat maneuvered into it. It was a beautiful day so we were looking forward to walking a couple of blocks to the bakery.
It was a really interesting neighborhood and Pat told me it was called 12 South – about a half mile stretch on 12th Avenue South – filled with restaurants, clothing stores, vintage clothing stores, an outdoor market, jewelry store, donut bakery, art gallery and a cookie shop. Lots and lots of folks were walking about, shopping and sitting in outdoor areas of the restaurants. Lots of dogs too.
The only problem was that the median age of everybody in the neighborhood appeared to be 30-25. Tops. I’m not kidding; Pat and I were the oldest people walking around. It certainly didn’t feel unsafe (and I did enjoy petting a lot of dogs) but I did feel a little out of place. I commented to Pat that maybe we needed passports to be in 12 South.
Have you ever felt out of place anywhere?
Trail Baboon 
Often.
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i feel out of place at places full of blue hairs then i walk by a window and see my reflection
when did my beard turn white?
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I look in the mirror and think, “who is that old lady?
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Planet Earth.
Chris in Owatonna
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I remember being with Wasband, who had a couple of masters degrees and could converse about things like quantum physics. I particularly dreaded one gathering of his friends, wondering how I could keep up with them. As it turned out, I was able to hold my own – and though I have no idea now what we talked about, it went a long way to making me more confident about my intelligence – or at least my ability to find something to talk about with smart people.
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Rise and Shine, Baboons,
I feel like I fit here on the Trail at most times—which is not the answer to your question, VS, but there it is. I was considering this, and thinking about Middle School/Jr. High ages when teens are trying so hard to fit and get peer approval, and few seem to meet the challenge. I think putting hundreds of kids in that developmental stage in a school, is a recipe for social problem after problem. They would do better in groups of mixed ages with many adults in the milieu and so many of the bullying and social problems would cease. Which replicates an old time country school.
The list of places/people in which I do not fit is long:
Sorority girls
Los Angeles
Evangelical or Orthodox religion of any kind
Florida
The GOP
Physics class
Texas
OT—we had an early, long day yesterday getting to an early flight. Everything went well with a nearly perfect flight. I needed two naps yesterday to recover. And now the weather for today is nearly identical to the weather in Minnesota. I am looking at the mountains which is not a MN landscape feature, though. I will head out for a long walk outside in a bit.
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I get massages from a place that is downtown Rochester in a pretty nice hotel. I walk in with my sleeveless shirts and dirty pants and EVERY. TIME. I feel out of place. But the massages have been tremendously helpful so I suck it up.
Actually any place sort of ‘dress up’ I feel out of place.
And boy, shops with too much stuff and narrow aisles. I feel like the bull in the china shop; I just need room around me and I get really nervous in antique stores full of stuff.
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My day to day wear over my life has always been worn, probably stained, shirts, jeans approaching extinction, etc. The Spanish people want to forget poverty and wear clean, untorn clothes at all times. So I feel out of place just going across the road in some of the Levi’s I still possess. Of course, jeans with “designer” rips would be fine, but I’ll die before I let a pair of them in the house.
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Right here in Palomar.
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OT: I have got to tell you guys! Eureka etc!! I’ve just realised a place has appeared in the house where I can put my record player and vinyl! Civilisation returns to Fenton’s life.
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“O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!”
He chortled in his joy. “
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I’m happy for you, Fenton!
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And while I’m playing my 45’s, I can be spreading out my LP’s and sorting them into genres (yet again)! Hours of fun to be had!
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I need a trip to England to get more vinyl. Hmm, now we’re moving the cats out, I can turn that building across the road into an R’n’R club!
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Not to mention a small amount of shellac.
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Well, I thought I was the only one who felt this way. I feel out of place often. I never used to. I used to be comfortable in social situations but as time goes on I am increasingly socially awkward and too self-conscious. I’m okay in restaurants or a bar and grill with a small group but not alone. Part of the problem could be my permanent singleness. Everyone is coupled up and I simply never found my partner. I might be more self-conscious about it than is necessary but there are times when I am aware that I’m among people who are judging me. I usually find a reason to leave at that point.
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That’s a tragedy, Krista. And you seem to be almost, but not quite, saying that you would have liked to find your partner . No doubt people do judge, as people will, and no doubt many make the wrong judgment. As people will. I understand your self consciosness, and am so sorry to hear about your situation.
Yes, I’ve been there.
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No need to feel sorry. I’m fine. I just adjust my life to fit my comfort level.
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I just knew I was asking for it. “I’ve been there, I understand.” It’s rarely true that you understand how another person feels, because you’ve “been there.”
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Yes, I’ve been in crowds where I didn’t feel I belonged and felt self-conscious about it. Sometimes it had to with how they or I was dressed; sometimes, I didn’t know a soul and didn’t feel like I had anything in common with any of them. I was much younger then, and felt I stuck out like a sore thumb. The reality probably is that I didn’t register on the radar of any of them.
Nowadays, I feel reasonably comfortable in my own skin, and that, I think, is key to not worrying about what others think of you. I pretty sure most people don’t actually notice me, and that’s just fine with me.
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I think the only place I might not feel comfortable would be at a conservative church service with a bunch of white evangelicals. There aren’t many other places I would feel out of place.
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Yes, so ironic that the Christian movement – I’ll start again.
Not ironic, perhaps. The Christian movement has become so fragmented (over the last 2000 years.) Room for both good people and bad people, supposedly with the same beliefs.
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I am glad of the anti white Christian nationalism statement the ELCA Lutheran Bishop has put out.
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Of course this. But where ever I’ve been is because I wanted to be there.
I often joke with kids in our congregation and ask. “Why are we here?”
What ever the answer
“Because we’re not there “
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I have a profitable platform where you can earñ a roi of $5000 with just $50 for registration
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