Category Archives: Mysteries

Family Fuel

Back to the macaroni gathering.

I’m sure you’ve all heard me say “why spoil a perfectly good holiday by spending it with my family”.  Sounds harsh but when my whole family is together, it gets weird fast.  The last time we were all together before my father’s death we were asked not to return to an Embers.  An Embers!

I wasn’t looking forward to the macaroni gathering but it’s one thing to `dis your family for decades behind their backs and another thing entirely to `dis them to their faces.  So Nonny and I got the condo ready; Nonny made her salad and I heated up the macaroni. 

The group included both my middle sister and her husband, my little sister, my niece, my niece’s partner, two nephews, one nephew’s partner and two boys. Oh, and Nonny and me.  It started out a little strained.  Even the St. Louis group doesn’t gather all that often and I know that my two sisters don’t approve all that much of the other one’s choices. 

At one point my middle sister starting telling a story about baby possums that had gotten into their house and how they had to catch to them release them outside.  My youngest nephew is all about animal rescue, trap/neuter/release and knows quite a bit about wild animal relocation.  He was horrified by my sister’s story, jumping in to express indignation and to educate us all about how most people handle relocation incorrectly.  My brother-in-law (let’s call him David) is a very nice man but in the dictionary, out in the margin next to the phrase “pours gas on the fire” is David’s picture.  As soon as he realized he had a captive audience, he was off and running.  There was an outrageous story about trapping possums under a trash can followed by his exhortation that you can’t keep possums in the house because when they grow up, then there is “possum mating”.  This was accompanied by him stamping his feet and slapping his hands together to illustrate how this mating would keep you up at night.  It was the funniest thing ever; it was a good thing I was sitting on the floor at the time because I would have fallen off my chair laughing. 

Unfortunately the one person in the room who did not get the joke and wasn’t laughing was my nephew.  He looked horrified.  I had to ask him if he understood the phrase “yanking your chain”.  Even once I explained it, you could tell he wasn’t too thrilled to join in the hilarity.  But the gas on the fire did the trick and loosened some of the tension.  Not perfect, but we did manage to spend another hour together without any incidents!

My middle sister is already asking when I think I’ll be visiting next year so we can do it again!  Oops.

Do you have any “gas on the fire” friends or relatives?  Or “gas on the fire” stories?

Getting From Here to There

It’s never a great sign when they close the plane doors, the walkway pulls back and then the plane just sits.  When I was headed to St. Louis it was pretty cold here.  Pilot came online to let us know that we had to get in line for de-icing.  I’m still not sure why we sat for an additional 45 minutes before we headed over to de-icing.  Then after de-icing, we also waited another 15 minutes before heading to the runway for take off. 

Not the end of the world… it was a direct flight so no anxiety about missing a connection and I had a good book.

On my return trip it was really cold and a lot of flights out of St. Louis were cancelled.  I’d checked all the flights to Minneapolis (my direct flight and all the connectors) and while most of the connectors were cancelled, my flight was still showing on time.  The plane wasn’t towed to the gate on time then a water hose was frozen.  They made us de-plane at that point for about an hour.  Then they put up back but we still sat.  Apparently hose was in running order but the computer had to be alerted that the maintenance was finished.  Then it turned out the plane had been put “out of service” and only somebody in Houston could correct that.   When we were finally all unlocked the pilot came online again to tell us that unfortunately due to the extremely cold weather, the drinks pod had sat outside too long and all the various pops and juices were frozen; they’d made the executive decision to forego beverage service so we wouldn’t have to delay longer.

There were audible groans heard throughout the plane at that point.  Me?  I laughed out loud. 

What do you consider a necessity when you travel?

I Will Not Finish the Puzzle….

I will not finish the puzzle today.  I will not finish the puzzle today.  I will not finish the puzzle today. 

I have an obsession problem when it comes to jigsaw puzzles.  I have trouble stopping once I sit down in front of a puzzle.  There have been times that I have not walked away for hours.  I’ve skipped meals, I’ve been late to work, I’ve lost sleep.  YA has inherited this from me.  During the pandemic holidays, we worked 8 hours on a puzzle, taking turns picking movies to watch on tv.  Sad (although we DID finish before bed).  Because of this, sometimes I shy away from starting a puzzle if I have things that need getting done.

Over the holidays I did an Advent jigsaw puzzle.  It was 24 little boxes of 42 pieces; one little puzzle a day that made one big puzzle at the end.  It was wonderful… it was a fun and relaxing start to my day throughout the season and the fact that each day was in its own box kept me from jumping ahead.  I will definitely do it again.

So when I started a new puzzle last Thursday I told myself that would have a two-hour limit.  I figured if I set a boundary, like the little boxes had been boundaries, then I could avoid sitting at the table for hours and hours on end.  I even wrote it down on my daily “to-do” list.  Thursday turned out fine; it took me right about two hours to sort out all the edge pieces and put them together.  I spent 2½ hours on Friday; aided and abetted by having my Zoom book club for close to three hours. 

On Saturday, I was making good progress and watching tv and I felt myself sliding down the slippery slope.  The two-hour mark came and went.  “I’ll just work until this tv show is over”.  Then the next show.  As the next show started, I began my mantra.  “I will not finish this puzzle” today, I will not finish this puzzle today”.  This worked; I stood up from table after a little over five hours.

You know how this is going to end.  I spent 5 hours yesterday and finished it as it was started to get dark.   And just what happened to the two hours yesterday?  I excused myself from the rule because I was feeling sorry for myself… still coughing a bit much to hang around with healthy folks.  I can  come up an excuse with the best of them!

Do you ever have to set limits on yourself?

(Thanks to Jacque for the puzzle!)

Much Ado About the Birthday

Today is YA’s birthday.  A whooping 29 years old today!!

YA is one of those folks who likes a little fuss but doesn’t like to admit they want a fuss.  This is hard for me because #1: I love making a fuss and #2: when you don’t want to admit to wanting fuss, then you don’t admit to what you actually want.  I have to figure what she MIGHT like and not go beyond that!

The first thing we have is a banner that says “Happy Birthday” that I made a few years ago; I hang it up across the arch between the dining room and living room.  I added two big balloons, one on each end of the arch.  A “2” and a “9”.  (YA’s dog Guinevere is twenty years younger than YA so we will keep the “9” for the end of the month!).  That’s it for décor.

Goodies are harder.  Most of the time YA is not a cookies/cake/cupcake kind of person. Most of the time.  But you can’t count on her birthday being a day that she’s in the mood.  She does however like brownies most of the time – as long as they don’t have frosting… so I can make those.  I have two big candles (again a “2” and “9”).  I did get a can of cream cheese frosting so I can write “Happy Birthday” on the brownies.  That will be OK with her. 

For a gift, she’s saving up for a new laptop so there is a giftcard for her.  Not exactly original but it’s what she really wants.  She is fairly particular about what she wears, so I would never buy her clothing. I can never guess what she might like to read so no books.  Between us we got four jigsaw puzzles for the holidays so that’s out.  Giftcard it will be.

All this fuss will be set up during the day while YA is at work so she’ll come home to the fun.  Hopefully I will have gotten the fuss to non-fuss ration correct!

What kind of birthday fuss to you like?

Risky Business

A 22-year old from Taiwan was apprehended at the Bangkok airport before Christmas after he was found to be carrying two Asian small-clawed otters and a prairie dog.  The man has the critters in socks, taped inside his boxer shorts; security officers were suspicious of the big bulge below the man’s waistband.

If I were a man, I’m not sure I’d put anything with claws and teeth (much less three of them) in my shorts.

I noticed this because I was just thinking about taking a small bag of spices with me to St. Louis last week.  I needed to recreate my sister’s mac and cheese recipe while I was at Nonny’s and was pretty sure that Nonny might not have all these spices.  I didn’t want to buy whole jars of them in St. Louis.  Putting spices in a ziplock made me think about another time I had spices in my suitcase.

About twenty years ago, my bag was the very last one to arrive on the luggage belt after I had come home from Thailand.  The sniffer dog did not alert on my bag but the fact that I had stood there so long waiting brought me to the attention of the sniffer dog’s handler.  Of course this was the one time I ever had something a little suspicious in my bag.  I had purchased some spices at a road-side stand while in Thailand… just baggies of powder with no labels.  Luckily none of them were white and one of them was filled with whole nutmegs, so it was easily explainable.  I was very glad I had the nutmegs and had not purchased anything even remotely white!           

Have you ever transported something you probably shouldn’t have?

Helping the Javelina

This is the last post about Nashville.  I swear.

When I did the blog last year about Henrietta (my stuffed javelina) going to Madison, it was kinda funny and I enjoyed it.  So I thought it would be fun to do it again on my trip to Nashville.  What I didn’t expect was that others would take on the cloak of silliness with me.

My friend Pat was absolutely obsessed with getting a photo of Henrietta wherever we went – zoo, Strawberry Café lunch, shopping, pizza place, the winery.  You’ve already seen the photos at the Goo Goo Cluster store and the Moonshine distillery and the breakfast place.  But she wasn’t the only one concerned that I get a good photo with Henrietta. 

A complete stranger at the zoo volunteered to take a photo of me and Henrietta with some flamingos that we out doing “meet & greet”.  Is demurred, not too sure how close I wanted to get to a huge (they are much bigger up close than you think) strange bird.

The woman working the bookstore at the Belmont Estate also noticed Henrietta in my bag and asked about her.  We were waiting for our tour to start so Pat was happy to go on and on about all the places that we had taken Henrietta over the past couple of days.  The woman got all excited and led us to a spot we would never have seen on our own… under a staircase on the second floor of the mansion.  There was a small statue of a pig, complete with a red bow.  This was a photo I couldn’t resist. 

Although it’s been fun, I’m not sure I need to keep it up.  I will probably take her to Tucson in March; it is after all her birthplace (my friend purchased her for me while I was there last year) but I’m not sure she will go to St. Louis with me this month.

Do you take selfies when you travel?

Alarming Trends

I have noticed over the past year or so a really alarming trend for people to back into parking paces in parking lots. At the grocery store, it means that if you have a van or you put your groceries in the trunk that it is hard to access the rear of your vehicle. I guess people do this so that they have better visibility when they leave their parking space. I think it is really dumb. It takes longer to park, makes it harder to park, and also makes it quicker for someone to steal your vehicle since they can just drive off instead of having to take time to back out.

People at my agency also noticed over the past year a trend for Middle School and High School female students to try to convince us that they have Dissociative Identity Disorder aka Multiple Personality Disorder, and watch TikTok videos to practice the symptoms and the shifting into the other personalities. They are so disappointed when we dismiss the symptoms.

If you haven’t noticed, I wrote this when I was really crabby. That is usually not a trend for me, but this has been an annoying week. I will be alarmed if my crabby trend continues.

What has made you crabby this week? What were the passing fads when you were in Middle School and High School.

Dressed to Impress

YA and were invited to a nice party over the weekend – a surprise 70th birthday party for a friend.  The invite didn’t mention any particular dress code but the party was held in a big lovely home up in Kenwood and it seemed like dressing up would be the right way to go. 

Dressing up is not something that I’ve ever been good at.  Pandemic, furlough and retirement has not helped.  I do have a pair of black palazzo pants so I started there but was struggling with a top to go with the pants.  Static didn’t help.  At one point YA came in and said “why don’t you just wear a dress?”  

Well, because I no longer own a dress.  I decided to look in the attic to make sure I wasn’t forgetting about any dresses but no, nothing.  I don’t even remember the last dress I owned or when it left the house, presumably in a goodwill/value village bag. 

I did find a top to go with the palazzo pants and the party was great but I kept thinking the rest of the weekend, “should I invest in a dress”?  Probably not a good use of income since I also can’t remember the last time the thought of wearing a dress even crossed my mind. 

When was the last time you dressed up?

More Baader-Meinhof

It’s been quite a while since I experienced the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon… when something you’ve just become aware of suddenly pops up seemingly everywhere.  It’s also called “frequency illusion” – even though you think you’ve discovered something for the first time, it’s just that you’ve noticed it for the first time.  Anyway, I’ve had a bunch lately:

Ljubljana, Slovenia.  Friends visited there this fall and wrote about it in their holiday newsletter.  First time I had heard of this city.  Then a couple of days letter, Ljubljana was mentioned in the National Geographic that I was reading. 

Tasmanian Tiger.  Also in National Geographic (although a different issue), there was a mention of the tiger.  Then the next day there was a sidebar in Scientific American.  I’d never heard of this dog-like “tiger” that went extinct in Tasmanian in the 1930s.  It’s been in the news because a paper came out in 2023 that they may have survived longer in the wild before the species died out.

Straight No Chaser.  While baking cookies right after Thanksgiving, I heard a funny carol on the radio – turned out to be a men’s acapella group called Straight No Chaser.  First time I heard of them (but I adore them already).  Then a week later, a friend of mind posted on Facebook that he was going to a Straight No Chaser concert that night. 

I do understand that the universe is not trying to send me coded messages but it’s hard to believe that the information is all around you and you’re just not registering it.  I do wonder why all three of these just popped up in the last month for me!

Any coincidences in your life lately? 

Time For a Change

The weekend Farm Report comes to us from Ben.

I have 4 analog wall clocks at the college that I reference often. All four are showing a different time. The one just off stage, that I knocked off the wall while changing a work light and it dropped 12 feet and bounce off the ladder, quit working. Go figure. I replaced the battery and reset the time and it went around to 12:10 and stopped there. That was about a month ago.

Another clock, back in the shop by the sign in sheet for the students, is running slow and it’s way off.

In my office is a clock with the Tasmanian Devil from Bugs Bunny on the face. It’s too much trouble to climb on the desk to change the time, so it’s accurate, but an hour off some of the year.

And down in the dressing room is another clock that’s off. If you plan your day and route accordingly, you can make all these work in your favor.

I got a lot of work done in the farm shop the last week. Threat of colder weather and snow prompted me. I got the carburetor installed on the 630 tractor and had it running last week. Cross that off the list! Yay! Here’s a short video just so you can hear the sound. It needs some adjustment yet, but at least it runs!

Or it did. The next time I went to start it, the starter shorted out and wouldn’t stop running and I had to disconnect the ground cable to make it stop. Sigh. Hang my head. Add that to the list. I used another tractor and pulled the 630 out of the way so I could get on with the rest of the projects. Pulling a tractor by yourself isn’t the smartest idea I’ve ever had; thank goodness the ground was level. The tractor not running kinda messes up my parking plans for the machinery. I think if I crawl under and disconnect the wire from the starter, I can put the ground wire back on, pull start the tractor to get it started, and then drive it to get it tucked away. We will worry about getting it out next spring. Always something.

While working on the shed, and talking out loud to myself, at one point I said, “Well, that’s not right.” And I thought to myself, ‘there’s a lot that’s not right in the world’. Later on, finagling three sheets of 14-foot pole barn steel, I said out loud, “This is not going at all like how I thought it was gonna go.” That’s about when I figured out I could do 2 sheets, but not three. Fourteen feet being taller than my center of balance, and all, created some issues. Anyway, I got the NE corner done and started moving stuff in.

It was just really nice to be home, and have the time, and do these projects. It just felt so good to “be of use”.

WHY CAN’T THINGS BE EASY?