Category Archives: Kids

Family, Food, Gatherings, Kids, Uncategorized

I Shoulda Known Better…

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On our second day at the Fair, YA and I hit the Ag Building a little before lunch. She surprised me by asking if we could check out the Minnesota beers.  The surprise is because not only have I never had a beer at the Fair, she doesn’t drink much at all and I’ve never known her to drink beer.  But keeping an open mind, we went and looked at the Minnesota beers.  If you haven’t been to the Fair the last few years, you can now get four smallish cups of beer – there are about six different “themes”; you do not get to mix and match.  After looking at them all and asking if there were “sample sizes”, YA said no to beer.

We wandered around a bit more, petted some more baby animals and then found a good spot for the parade, right across from the International Market. After the parade, we headed over to the market to see what kind of good foods we might find and as we went, we passed the Schmidt Brewery store front where they do a flight of three beers.  One of them was a “fruity” and YA asked if we could get a flight to share.  I am not a beer drinker but I figured we were splitting 3 small cups, so even though I felt SURE that this wasn’t a good idea, we went for it.

The fruity one had grapefruit in it. I knew after one sip, that I wouldn’t be having more of that one.  YA felt the same, so we dumped that one.  YA kept the pale ale and I took the last one.  It really wasn’t to my taste, so after a couple more swallows, that one went in the trash as well.  Then YA baled on the pale ale, leaving it to me.  I was forcing myself to drink it, thinking if I didn’t, it was a complete waste of the money I’d spent.  I made it about 2/3 of the way through the small cup before I realized that the money was gone and my having a terrible time wouldn’t bring the money back.  Into the trash it went.  So I figure together we only drank about ¾ of one small cup.  Then we each got a lemonade to wash away the beer taste!

When was the last time you did something against your better judgment?

Art, Family, home, Kids, Media, Music, News, Uncategorized

Gender Bender

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I have followed with some dismay the recent criticism of poor little Prince George for taking ballet lessons, and was glad to see the support of his dancing by other media figures and dancers.  Our son studied ballet for 12 years. It helped with some of his motor coordination problems from his prematurity. He channeled it into a study of the martial arts in college, and now he can break a board on his head!  He still retains some dance moves, and it is amusing to see all 6’5″, 250 lbs. of him doing a pas de chat (dance of the cat) down the sidewalk.

I did not encounter much gender bias growing up. My parents encouraged me to do what I wanted to do. I remember being outraged at about age 5 when I was told I couldn’t run around outside without a  shirt, though. Most of my cousins were boys, so I played lots of sports with them and tagged along with them as they did their boy activities like building model cars and tree houses, stockpiling fire crackers, making homemade cannons, and setting pocket gopher traps.

I remember that boys with non-traditional interests had a harder time of it.  I remember the discomfort people back home had when a boy became the first male cheerleader at my high school.  It looks like, given poor Prince George,  that things haven’t changed much. I hope he keeps dancing. Maybe he will do a pas de chat through Westminister Abbey at his coronation.

What gender bias did you encounter or witness growing up?

Family, History, holidays, Kids, Travel, Uncategorized

Leading Me Astray and Egging Me On

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Daughter has done it again. She has cast out her net of excitement and wild ideas and caught me.

The other day she sent a photo via text. It was identical to the header photo, which is a shot of Hallstatt, Austria. “Mom!! Isn’t this place beautiful? Wouldn’t this be nice over Christmas!! We fly to Munich and then take the train. I’ll pay for my own airline ticket. Just think of the Christmas markets!”  She says this at a very rapid pace.

I said a trip like that takes a lot of planning. She replies, “Ok.  Let’s go the Christmas of 2020!! We will have lots of time to plan and save our money. Oh, Mom! Think of the Christmas markets!”  I feel myself sliding down the slippery slope to consider this seriously.  Daughter knows that if I am in favor of something like this, it will happen. Husband always says he wants his two beauties to be happy, and Daughter knows if I agree to something, her father will go along with it.

Husband chimes in “I think that is a historically interesting place.  The Celts settled there, and there are ancient salt mines.” He then goes to the basement to get a book about the region.

I think, well, it isn’t that far from the area of Germany where Husband’s family hales from. Maybe we could visit Stuttgart and Wurttemberg as long as we were there. Husband has always wanted to do that.  I tell her I will contact our travel agent and get her working on it.

This is how we ended up in Europe three years ago. Daughter gets an idea, and then we just run with it. There are very few people who can propel me on adventures like my daughter can.

How do people convince you to do things you wouldn’t normally do?  Who in your family was (or is) good at getting you into trouble?

Family, Gatherings, Kids, Medicine, Uncategorized

Pessimist vs Optimist

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I must admit am a pessimist. I worry about the worst case scenario happening. I am happy to say I am usually wrong, though. You would think that I would have sufficient evidence by now to be more optimistic about things, but that hasn’t happened yet.

I was really worried during  our recent trip to  my father in law’s funeral.   Husband comes from a blended family with two full siblings and their spouses, three step siblings and their spouses, and various married children and their spouses.  We all have traditionally got along pretty well, but for some reason I was worried about all Hell breaking loose when everyone was together en masse for the first time in 25 years.  My training  as a psychologist causes me to hypothesize about future behavior, and I focus on negative possibilities.

We have a Trump-loving NRA fanatic, two Bipolar Manic types (one of whom refuses to take medications),  some who drink too much, someone with a pain medication addiction, a hoity toity, self appointed manners expert, several evangelical conservative Christians, ELCA Lutherans, and several liberal Democrats.  What could go wrong when everyone is upset over a death?  Plenty, in my pessimistic mind!

Well, I was completely wrong. Everyone was pleasant, no one drank too much, and no one was manic. The NRA supporter was so angry about the scandals at the NRA headquarters he could hardly speak about it, and religion and politics and manners critique took a holiday. Phew!

When have you been wrong? What are you pessimistic or optimistic about?

Family, History, Kids, Uncategorized, work

What About Cousins?

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I live pretty equidistant from about three Indian reservations in three different states.  I sometimes see tribal members  at my community mental health agency.  Part of doing my work is getting a good family history.  I have noticed, over 30 years of practice,  distinct differences in how tribal members and everyone who is not a tribal member describes family relationships.  For my tribal clients, there are any number of aunties, uncles,  sisters, and brothers who are important in their lives. They  just don’t match how I, in my eurocentric  orientation, define family.

A good friend of our, a person who is an Arikara Indian,  one of the Three Affiliated Tribes from the Fort Berthold Reservation where Husband works,  posted on Facebook recently a way to navigate these family relationships.

This apparently comes from some sort of Mandan, Arikara, and Hidatsa tribal handbook. Here is how you navigate relationships. for boys. Girls are pretty much the same.

Who is my mother?

  1. My birth mother.
  2. .My mother’s sister
  3. My father’s brother’s wife
  4. My clan father’s wives (My father’s clan brothers)

Who is my father? 

  1. My birth father
  2. My father’s brothers
  3. My sister’s husband
  4. My father’s mother’s brother
  5. My clan fathers (My father’s clan brothers)
  6. My father’s sister’s son

Who is my sister?

  1. My blood sister
  2. My father’s brother’s daughter
  3. My sister’s daughters
  4. My female clan members (My mother’s clan)
  5. Female children of my father’s clan
  6. My mother’s sister’s daughter

Who is my brother?

  1. My blood brothers
  2. My father’s brother’s sons
  3. My sister’s son’s
  4. My mother’s sisters’ sons
  5. My clan male mothers
  6. Male children of my fathers’ clan
  7. My mother’s brother
  8. My mother’s mother’s brother

Who is my auntie?

  1. My father’s sisters
  2.  My father’s sister’s daughter-each generation
  3. My clan aunts (My father’s clan sisters)

Who is my grandmother?

  1. My mother’s mother
  2. My mother’s mother’s sister (Grandmother’s sister)
  3. My father’s mother
  4. My father’s mother’s sister
  5. My mother’s father’s sister-each generation

I notice that great uncles, great aunts, and cousins are defined differently here.  I also find that if I use this to define my family relationships, I have a lot more siblings, parents, and aunts and uncles. That is kind of comforting.

How do you define family? How would your definition change given the above information? 

 

Art, Family, Kids, Uncategorized

Oops!

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After my father-in-law’s funeral last week,  Husband and his two siblings divided up the memorabilia. There was no quarreling or hard feelings or difficulties. Husband got lots of photos, an Ohio State sweatshirt, an acrylic painting of willows on the Sheboygan River that his mother had done years ago, and two beer steins that his dad and stepmother had bought in Germany and Austria.

We decided that our son should have the steins. He was back at the hotel when all this dividing up happened, and when we got back to the hotel I marched up to his room, a stein in each hand, knocked on the door, and enthusiastically announced “Bier Her!!”  A total stranger answered the door. I was at the wrong room on the wrong floor! The middle aged female occupant was very nice about it, and we laughed, but my did I feel embarrassed.

Tell about a time you were embarrassed. Any interesting stories about dividing up things after a funeral?

Business, Gatherings, Kids, Music, Seasons, Uncategorized, Weather, work

My Little Rock Star

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My company does a fun summer program that includes concerts out on the big lawn between two of our buildings. On Thursday it was Chris Kroeze.  As I was tapping my toe I noticed a toddler towards the front of the crowd, not more than four.  His folks and younger sibling were sitting on the grass behind him but there was no sitting for him.  He had a small electric guitar (probably not real) and he was wailing on it.  Non-stop.  And he had moves; he looked like he would have been right at home up on the stage.  I stayed out on the lawn for about 30 minutes and this kid was playing his heart out the entire time.   I thought about going over and introducing myself and asking his name, because I’m sure in 15-20 years, he’s going to be famous and I would be able to say I knew him when.

Have you ever met a famous person? Was it what you expected?

100 Words, Gatherings, Kids, Media, The Future, Travel, Uncategorized

Branded For Life

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I read with a great deal of amusement about the redheaded two year old who drove his electric John Deere tractor to the Chisago County Fair.  He made the national news and it was a relief to see something fun in the media for a change.

He is certainly an enterprising youngster, and I am glad his adventure was a safe one. I only hope this isn’t something that people bring up  for the rest of his life.

I hope there are other, more edifying things that will define him.  It would be terrible to be branded as a wild man at age two.

Tell about your experiences at the fair.

100 Words, books, Family, Kids, Nature, Uncategorized, Weather

There Must Be a Rainbow

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On Tuesday afternoon I stopped at the library and it started to rain a bit right then. As I was leaving, I was behind a young mom and her daughter, who was maybe 7 or 8.  As they reached the end of the covered portico, the mom said “It’s sprinkling a little.  There must be a rainbow somewhere.”

Most people would say “run quick to the car” or “let’s get home before it really starts”, perfectly acceptable. But I was struck by this mother’s wonderful way of looking at life.  It there is rain, there must be a rainbow.

What adage would you like to live by?

Family, Food, Gatherings, Kids, Nature, Travel, Uncategorized

Stuff Rant

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It was a gorgeous day for the zoo. Lots of young families.  Lots of strollers.  Big strollers.  Double-wide strollers.  Holding lots of stuff.  I guess the world has changed but when Baby and I went out and about, I used a narrow umbrella stroller, put a couple of diapers and a ziplock w/ some wipes in my purse, filled up a sippy cup and off we went.

Apparently these days you need considerably more to venture out into the world: multiples sippy cups (and strollers have sippy cup holders built in now), bags of animal crackers, apple slices, cookies, cheerios, large containers of wipes, massive numbers of diapers, toys, towels, changes of clothing for the little ones. I’m sure there is more needed, but this is just what I saw with my own eyes.  And that’s just the stuff for the kids. Parents need bottles and cup holders and snacks as well.

On a busy day, all these strollers full of stuff take up a LOT of room at places like the zoo. I wholeheartedly encourage  families with young kids to enjoy places like the zoo, but do they really need so much STUFF?

What kind of of stuff do you need for an outing?